The Winter is Approaching
a Shakespearean Sonnet130 total reviews
Comment from victor 66
Like many things in life, the best thing to do is to embrace that which to some can seem like a hardship. Growing up in Minnesota, as kids we gave little thought to the temperature or the conditions. you might have to just dress warmer. But we went outside pretty much all the time. There was ice skating, sledding, snowball fights, and building forts. It was all good. Happy Thanksgiving.
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Like many things in life, the best thing to do is to embrace that which to some can seem like a hardship. Growing up in Minnesota, as kids we gave little thought to the temperature or the conditions. you might have to just dress warmer. But we went outside pretty much all the time. There was ice skating, sledding, snowball fights, and building forts. It was all good. Happy Thanksgiving.
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Victor, Happy Thanksgiving and thank you so much for your gracious review :-) Brooke
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Brook, it's easy to write a positive review when you're writing it. You are most welcome.
Comment from kiwisteveh
Watch out - the Syllable nazis might count 'towards' as two syllables....
This is a lovely sonnet which does a great job of contrasting the dread chill of winter with its prettier side. The metaphor of the advancing army works really well to highlight the dangers and the message to 'abide' is thought-provoking.
I tend to agree with your comments about the repeating rhyme pair, although it is still something I would try to avoid.
Good luck.
Steve
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Watch out - the Syllable nazis might count 'towards' as two syllables....
This is a lovely sonnet which does a great job of contrasting the dread chill of winter with its prettier side. The metaphor of the advancing army works really well to highlight the dangers and the message to 'abide' is thought-provoking.
I tend to agree with your comments about the repeating rhyme pair, although it is still something I would try to avoid.
Good luck.
Steve
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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only if the syllable nazis are Brits LOL In American dictionaries twards is actually the preferred pronunciation :-) I see no need to avoid that which is not forbidden and which was used by Shakespeare more than once. It is, after all, called a Shakespearean sonnet. LOL Thanks for the feedback, Steve :-) Brooke
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Well you may think I'm being picky, but these are not just the same rhyme sound, but basically the same words:
aside/abide
side/abide
I don't think Shakespeare does that.
I checked out the two sonnets you mention. #3 does repeat 'thee' but that's a pronoun not a lexical word. In #4 I can't really see anything close to the repeated rhyme you have used...
Steve
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I wasn't looking to see if he repeated a rhyme in that same way, just that a rhyming group is re-used - I'm happy with repeating the words and challenge anyone to find any kind of "rule" stopping me - if poetry ever comes down to a matter of searching for rules about the repetition of lexical words, I will bemoan the state of artistic expression :-)
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Not worried about a 'rule' - It just doesn't feel right...
Comment from Martin Chan
A very composed Shakespearean Sonnet II poem written for the prompt entry.Perfect choice of words. I like the rhyme scheme also. The picture of a blue jay bird in winter scene is a perfect match for the theme of the poem.
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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A very composed Shakespearean Sonnet II poem written for the prompt entry.Perfect choice of words. I like the rhyme scheme also. The picture of a blue jay bird in winter scene is a perfect match for the theme of the poem.
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Martin, so good to hear from you :-) Thanks so much for your generous sixth star and gracious comments :-) Brooke
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You're welcome.
Comment from lakeport
The Winter is approaching, indeed winter seem to be in a hurry this year, that's a wonderful expressed poem,nice rhyming , I enjoyed reading it,God bless you,Hugs!lakeport.Happy Thanksgiving Day to you and yours!
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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The Winter is approaching, indeed winter seem to be in a hurry this year, that's a wonderful expressed poem,nice rhyming , I enjoyed reading it,God bless you,Hugs!lakeport.Happy Thanksgiving Day to you and yours!
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Erich, thank you so much :-) Brooke
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you are very welcome.Hugs!lakeport.
Comment from gazzagodbod
What a beautiful wintery picture fabulous little winter poem gave me a little shiver loved it another sixer from the xgodbodx
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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What a beautiful wintery picture fabulous little winter poem gave me a little shiver loved it another sixer from the xgodbodx
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Gazza, thank you so much, my thoughtful and generous friend :-) Brooke
Comment from RodG
This is definitely a worthy contest contender, Brooke.
I really like how you have personified Winter as an "interloper" and an unwelcome invader who leads an army toward the Speaker's abode.
An excellent contrast drawn in stanza 3 of Winter's "softer side" which you find splendid and beautiful.
The rhyme and meter are flawless!
Rod
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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This is definitely a worthy contest contender, Brooke.
I really like how you have personified Winter as an "interloper" and an unwelcome invader who leads an army toward the Speaker's abode.
An excellent contrast drawn in stanza 3 of Winter's "softer side" which you find splendid and beautiful.
The rhyme and meter are flawless!
Rod
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Rod, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Ekim777
Smoothly written. I'm sure the Bard would grunt his approval. Our poet covers all bases in the canvas she sketches. Despite the discomfort of the cold, we can all glory in the beauty of the snowflake. It seems that winter has a protective side and we might be reminded that; "If winter come, can spring be far behind. -Ekim777
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Smoothly written. I'm sure the Bard would grunt his approval. Our poet covers all bases in the canvas she sketches. Despite the discomfort of the cold, we can all glory in the beauty of the snowflake. It seems that winter has a protective side and we might be reminded that; "If winter come, can spring be far behind. -Ekim777
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Thank you, Ekim, for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from Gladness
I like the autumn and the winter, but the weather is mild where I live. No snow. We also do have the beauty of it to wonder at.
Many places are having a "frozen blast" this year.
Hope you are staying warm.
You have my vote for a well done sonnet. =)
Anita
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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I like the autumn and the winter, but the weather is mild where I live. No snow. We also do have the beauty of it to wonder at.
Many places are having a "frozen blast" this year.
Hope you are staying warm.
You have my vote for a well done sonnet. =)
Anita
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Thank you so much, Anita, for your kind contest wishes and thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from Lulube
beautiful imagery, great rhyming, even with a couple of repeats it does not interfere because of the length between them. I think back to back, it would take the effect of the rhyme away. But a little distance never hurt anything. lol
great job
lulube
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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beautiful imagery, great rhyming, even with a couple of repeats it does not interfere because of the length between them. I think back to back, it would take the effect of the rhyme away. But a little distance never hurt anything. lol
great job
lulube
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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lulube, thank you so much :-) Brooke
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welcome Brooke
lulube
Comment from Glasstruth
You make winter with its personification sound so elegant, like a suit and tie, and beautiful as it dances all over us. Like how you refer to it as an interloper which adds to what the rhymes mean in that stanza. Beautifully written. Les
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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You make winter with its personification sound so elegant, like a suit and tie, and beautiful as it dances all over us. Like how you refer to it as an interloper which adds to what the rhymes mean in that stanza. Beautifully written. Les
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Thank you so much, Les :-) Brooke
