Dark Covenant
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Witches' Brew"The Berwick Witches Series: Book One
15 total reviews
Comment from Dawn Munro
I'm not at all sure I care for dropping in on a story as I've done, simply because I'm not sure how fair it is to a writer - I'm not sure how thorough a review can be in that case.
But having said that, let me say now that this chapter is rich in description and dialogue, the pacing is marvelous, and the characters seem well defined and authentic. While I can't comment a lot on plot, the story seems compelling, and the narrative voice is strong. My only nit (and it surprises me because I love clichés and use them too) is the 'pin drop'. I'd prefer to see something original, written by the author, as it appears to me it shouldn't be any problem with skill like this.
Well done!
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2014
  |
I'm not at all sure I care for dropping in on a story as I've done, simply because I'm not sure how fair it is to a writer - I'm not sure how thorough a review can be in that case.
But having said that, let me say now that this chapter is rich in description and dialogue, the pacing is marvelous, and the characters seem well defined and authentic. While I can't comment a lot on plot, the story seems compelling, and the narrative voice is strong. My only nit (and it surprises me because I love clichés and use them too) is the 'pin drop'. I'd prefer to see something original, written by the author, as it appears to me it shouldn't be any problem with skill like this.
Well done!
Comment Written 03-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2014
-
Thank you very much.
Comment from daeneam
I got attracted to the title and I admired you for such a creative idea. I also read the prologue and the other chapters and I enjoyed it so much. Thank you very much. c", mae
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2014
|
I got attracted to the title and I admired you for such a creative idea. I also read the prologue and the other chapters and I enjoyed it so much. Thank you very much. c", mae
Comment Written 01-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2014
-
Thank you very much for reading. I'm glad you're enjoying the book.
Comment from robina1978
I completely lost the plot but you did not post for a while. The foot note helped to get into it a bit. Great artwork that complements it very well. Nice you are going to publish.
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2014
|
I completely lost the plot but you did not post for a while. The foot note helped to get into it a bit. Great artwork that complements it very well. Nice you are going to publish.
Comment Written 01-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2014
-
Thank you for keeping up with the book. I had provided a summary of the last chapter, but it made the chapter longer.
Comment from Gargantuan2
The chapter is well written, and it is a good step closer to resolution of some problems the characters have run into.
I found 3 things to ponder:
Veronica scold.
Veronica scolded.
in the 1800s.
(inside quotes means speech, I know of no human that speak numbers, the narrative side would be different)
in the eighteen hundreds.
Jewel lean forward
Jewel leaned forward
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2014
|
The chapter is well written, and it is a good step closer to resolution of some problems the characters have run into.
I found 3 things to ponder:
Veronica scold.
Veronica scolded.
in the 1800s.
(inside quotes means speech, I know of no human that speak numbers, the narrative side would be different)
in the eighteen hundreds.
Jewel lean forward
Jewel leaned forward
Comment Written 01-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2014
-
Thank you for your review and for corrections.
Comment from chasennov
Chapter 5 of the book Dark Covenant "Witches' Brew" This is an excellent chapter you have created here. You may somehow notice that FS readers do not read overly lengthy stories. I know because I have had that problem in the past. Well done.
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2014
|
Chapter 5 of the book Dark Covenant "Witches' Brew" This is an excellent chapter you have created here. You may somehow notice that FS readers do not read overly lengthy stories. I know because I have had that problem in the past. Well done.
Comment Written 01-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2014
-
I know many don't. But I find if your work is interesting, they'll keep reading. All my books on here will be published, so all I want is a few good feedback and I get that. Thanks for the review. I appreciate it.
-
You are most welcome.
Comment from marijmd
This I missed what the spell will do? Will it be the answer to stop killing the new born boys?
That plan did backfire completely - hope they can salvage it before all hell breaks loose!
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
|
This I missed what the spell will do? Will it be the answer to stop killing the new born boys?
That plan did backfire completely - hope they can salvage it before all hell breaks loose!
Comment Written 30-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
-
Thank you for keeping up with the chapters. No you didn't miss it. Jewel explains in a later chapter.
Comment from Writingfundimension
An excellent chapter, Amahra. The plan is very readily accepted, no matter the cost to Jewel and, obviously, the Sooner boy. I worry that things may not go as smoothly as the adults feel they will. Great dialogue, moving the story firmly forward.
:) Bev
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
|
An excellent chapter, Amahra. The plan is very readily accepted, no matter the cost to Jewel and, obviously, the Sooner boy. I worry that things may not go as smoothly as the adults feel they will. Great dialogue, moving the story firmly forward.
:) Bev
Comment Written 30-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
-
Thank you so much for reading. I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter.
-
You're most welcome!
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Who's going to kidnap and bite the kid? Good question, rather like belling the cat. Someone has to do it. I'm sure you've picked just the right werewolf.
I can't wait till Kayla learns more about Matt's family! :)
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
|
Who's going to kidnap and bite the kid? Good question, rather like belling the cat. Someone has to do it. I'm sure you've picked just the right werewolf.
I can't wait till Kayla learns more about Matt's family! :)
Comment Written 30-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
-
Thank you, Phyllis. Glad you're reading me.
Comment from royowen
A very interesting episode. Amahra, werewolves and witches. Jewell has discovered a ancient spell that may curtail the slaying of infant boys before they reach maturity, but it entails the sacrifice of a boy, however Matt has hatched a cunning plan, which deharshes it! Great episode Amahra, maybe we can see a healing of the rift between the brothers, enthralling episode! Well done, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
|
A very interesting episode. Amahra, werewolves and witches. Jewell has discovered a ancient spell that may curtail the slaying of infant boys before they reach maturity, but it entails the sacrifice of a boy, however Matt has hatched a cunning plan, which deharshes it! Great episode Amahra, maybe we can see a healing of the rift between the brothers, enthralling episode! Well done, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
-
Thank you, Roy. Blessings also.
Comment from adewpearl
Witches' Brew - add apostrophe for plural possessive
Dialogue conveys intense emotion well
arms folded across their chests and chins up in the air - excellent use of non-verbal communication to convey emotion/attitude
lots of intrigue to keep readers involved
Brooke
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
|
Witches' Brew - add apostrophe for plural possessive
Dialogue conveys intense emotion well
arms folded across their chests and chins up in the air - excellent use of non-verbal communication to convey emotion/attitude
lots of intrigue to keep readers involved
Brooke
Comment Written 30-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2014
-
Thank you, Brooke for this fine review. I'll make the correction.
