Framed
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "SANNOS"A thriller set in Washington
4 total reviews
Comment from JanetRussek
This story is unbelievable! I found myself reading faster and faster with each word. Darn it; cliffhanger chapter ending. Description of setting an character emotion is amazing. What else can I say. BRAVO.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2014
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This story is unbelievable! I found myself reading faster and faster with each word. Darn it; cliffhanger chapter ending. Description of setting an character emotion is amazing. What else can I say. BRAVO.
Comment Written 02-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2014
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Every writer dreams of six star reviews. You have made my day.
Comments like this re-motivate and ease the self doubt For that I thank you.
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Well, Bob, I'm just tellin' it like it is.
Regards, Janet
Comment from Charley489
I suspect you know more about writing than I do, being a novice.
I did find some reduction in words would make this smoother in my humble opinion; for example
The girl was naked on the ground while the rapist crouched above ---- The naked girl laid on the ground under her
attacker
It had been some form of training, military training. --- It had been a form military training....
Shock delayed the rapist's reaction, but only by an instant of a second ---- shock delayed the reaction of the rapist by a mere instant
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2014
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I suspect you know more about writing than I do, being a novice.
I did find some reduction in words would make this smoother in my humble opinion; for example
The girl was naked on the ground while the rapist crouched above ---- The naked girl laid on the ground under her
attacker
It had been some form of training, military training. --- It had been a form military training....
Shock delayed the rapist's reaction, but only by an instant of a second ---- shock delayed the reaction of the rapist by a mere instant
Comment Written 02-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2014
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Charley I thank you for your comment, and the generosity of five stars. I really appreciate reviews like this as they are most constructive and therefore help the writer hone his talent.
Comment from royowen
I really like this story, which is basically about survival, which our hero. Callin, has no recollection of a former life, bur appears to have skills linked to some sort of para military or similar, he has jumped from a slowing truck, hurt himself heaven knows where, come across a creep raping a girl and is finally faced by a gun! Well done, look forward to next! Well written, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2014
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I really like this story, which is basically about survival, which our hero. Callin, has no recollection of a former life, bur appears to have skills linked to some sort of para military or similar, he has jumped from a slowing truck, hurt himself heaven knows where, come across a creep raping a girl and is finally faced by a gun! Well done, look forward to next! Well written, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 02-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2014
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Thank you Roy. Comments like this not only boost a writer's ego, they motivate him to keep going.
If only you were an agent or a publisher.
Thank you again
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Good story Bob, sorry I'm not, perhaps some film studio could take it up! Blessings, Roy.
Comment from TOMORAL
Wow. Bring on the next chapter, please. This is riveting. I don't know whether the MC is to be pitied or hated, but the story is spellbinding. Great work, here.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2014
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Wow. Bring on the next chapter, please. This is riveting. I don't know whether the MC is to be pitied or hated, but the story is spellbinding. Great work, here.
Comment Written 02-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2014
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Tomoral, what can I say. Six stars, that really produces the WOW factor. It also re-motivates and inspires the writer to keep writing.
At the moment I'm actually starting out on a follow-up novel for Calin. So your posting has again fired up my enthusiasm. For that I'm indebted to you
