The Night the Lights Went Out
story poem in rhyming couplets131 total reviews
Comment from mermaids
This is an eery bone chilling poem that could be true to life,people panic and trample over others. You tell a horror story in poetic form that is scary yet has no ghouls,goblins or Halloween creatures,only man, who can be the scariest. Well done here.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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This is an eery bone chilling poem that could be true to life,people panic and trample over others. You tell a horror story in poetic form that is scary yet has no ghouls,goblins or Halloween creatures,only man, who can be the scariest. Well done here.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Elaine, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from persevere
A gripping story in a poem. It raises an interesting question as to what caused the stampede as guns were not fired and knives not drawn. I am reminded of a stampede in an athletic stadium.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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A gripping story in a poem. It raises an interesting question as to what caused the stampede as guns were not fired and knives not drawn. I am reminded of a stampede in an athletic stadium.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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persevere, thank you - yes, just like a stadium stampede where people inadvertently kill each other because they share the same panicked fear :-) Brooke
Comment from Wendyanne
Hi Brooke. This is an extremely well written piece of horror poetry. You have certainly described the scene vividly and I can picture it in my mind. Wonderful!!!
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Hi Brooke. This is an extremely well written piece of horror poetry. You have certainly described the scene vividly and I can picture it in my mind. Wonderful!!!
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you, Wendyanne, for your generous response to this poem :-) Brooke
Comment from Adri7enne
I guess "we have nothing to fear but fear itself." We can all do great harm by struggling in the dark. This is a departure from most of your upbeat poetry. Must be the Halloween spirit moving you. Well done, Brooke.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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I guess "we have nothing to fear but fear itself." We can all do great harm by struggling in the dark. This is a departure from most of your upbeat poetry. Must be the Halloween spirit moving you. Well done, Brooke.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Adrienne, thank you so much :-) Every October I allow the dark side to come out :-) Brooke
Comment from Sanku
Quite a terrifying story! The speaker was spared ,but was an unwilling witness to this mindless dance of death.I kept hoping that it would turn out to be a dream ,but no such relief.Halloween season is the time for scary stories!
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Quite a terrifying story! The speaker was spared ,but was an unwilling witness to this mindless dance of death.I kept hoping that it would turn out to be a dream ,but no such relief.Halloween season is the time for scary stories!
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you so much, Sanku :-) Brooke
Comment from Benny Beeharry
I am very touched by this writing. What more can i say. It is still happening.
We are still groaning under this heartless killing and bloodshed. God bless.this deserves a six.
Benny Beeharry
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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I am very touched by this writing. What more can i say. It is still happening.
We are still groaning under this heartless killing and bloodshed. God bless.this deserves a six.
Benny Beeharry
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Benny, thank you so very much for your generous response to my poem :-) Brooke
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Brooke, this is an exceptional poem and should be a 6, which I have not got. The rhyming couplets are very good with near rhyme count/out. The meter is so good - to tell a story with consistent 11 syllables per line) throughout, and the whole eight stanzas telling a perfect story that is not contrived in any way, is really admirable. I wish I had not been so profligate with my 6's. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Brooke, this is an exceptional poem and should be a 6, which I have not got. The rhyming couplets are very good with near rhyme count/out. The meter is so good - to tell a story with consistent 11 syllables per line) throughout, and the whole eight stanzas telling a perfect story that is not contrived in any way, is really admirable. I wish I had not been so profligate with my 6's. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Dorothy, thank you so very much :-) Brooke
Comment from zanya
Not unlike the world we inhabit today perhaps , where inexplicable tragedies emerge, veritably, out of nowhere, or so it would seem 'none claim to know who extinguished the lights'- perhaps it is the Light within our own Spirit we are extinguishing, as we smother Spirit with consumerism and indeed hatred - lots of food for though here
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Not unlike the world we inhabit today perhaps , where inexplicable tragedies emerge, veritably, out of nowhere, or so it would seem 'none claim to know who extinguished the lights'- perhaps it is the Light within our own Spirit we are extinguishing, as we smother Spirit with consumerism and indeed hatred - lots of food for though here
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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zanya, thank you so much for your generous and thoughtful response to this poem :-) Brooke
Comment from Caressa_08
A virtual six your way for your rhyming poem..Very in depth story & a fearful one, if such an event was ever to take place, & first time I've read a poem here of such an occurrence...The moon, every night is there & without that light, guess it could stir up some anarchy, or to some degree, or who knows, is anyone's guess, making people's character change, with many deaths & destruction.
Caressa
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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A virtual six your way for your rhyming poem..Very in depth story & a fearful one, if such an event was ever to take place, & first time I've read a poem here of such an occurrence...The moon, every night is there & without that light, guess it could stir up some anarchy, or to some degree, or who knows, is anyone's guess, making people's character change, with many deaths & destruction.
Caressa
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you so very much, Caressa :-) Brooke
Comment from Kenneth Schaal
What a picture of abject desperation. I don't know what you drew on her for inspiration, but the apt descriptions brought to mind a congestion of people propelled by the fear of fire, bombing, etc. Fear, all by it lonesome, is a killer. Nice lilt. Kenny
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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What a picture of abject desperation. I don't know what you drew on her for inspiration, but the apt descriptions brought to mind a congestion of people propelled by the fear of fire, bombing, etc. Fear, all by it lonesome, is a killer. Nice lilt. Kenny
Comment Written 25-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Kenny, thank you so much :-) Brooke
