Texas Dream Catcher
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "CHAPTER OCHO; PART DOS"Drug & human trafficking, can romance win?
39 total reviews
Comment from irishauthorme
Good dialogue, and interesting about the baked mescal and the prickly pear cactus. I'm trying to remember if prickly pear is the cactus we used to get the fruit from and eat it raw?
Good flow, and this chapter had a 'real feel' of actual events.
irish
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2014
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Good dialogue, and interesting about the baked mescal and the prickly pear cactus. I'm trying to remember if prickly pear is the cactus we used to get the fruit from and eat it raw?
Good flow, and this chapter had a 'real feel' of actual events.
irish
Comment Written 11-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2014
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I have heard you can eat it raw. I usually eat it cooked. Thank you.
Comment from Ookami Taki
I really enjoyed this read; I'll have to go back and look at other chapters to catch up! I apologize in advance if I stick my foot in my mouth by commenting on this chapter alone without knowing about the others. The writing is very smooth and flows fairly well. The dialogue is natural, and the characters are recognizable, even without me previously knowing them. This excerpt contains plot elements that competently carry what came before into foreshadowing a bit of what is to come - good job with that. It's subtle but not watered-down. The pacing is good too. Great job!
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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I really enjoyed this read; I'll have to go back and look at other chapters to catch up! I apologize in advance if I stick my foot in my mouth by commenting on this chapter alone without knowing about the others. The writing is very smooth and flows fairly well. The dialogue is natural, and the characters are recognizable, even without me previously knowing them. This excerpt contains plot elements that competently carry what came before into foreshadowing a bit of what is to come - good job with that. It's subtle but not watered-down. The pacing is good too. Great job!
Comment Written 23-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Sloegin
As usual, a well presented chapter. I missed your usual conflict and suspense. Especially after reading the super ending of your last chapter.
It's such a pleasure reading a SPAG free chaapter, after what I've been reading on FS lately. Thank you for posting.
Being a southerner, you made a word jump out at me;tator. I've always spelled it, tater.
Please keep writing, I read it all, but most times I don't have anything to critique.
sloegin
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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As usual, a well presented chapter. I missed your usual conflict and suspense. Especially after reading the super ending of your last chapter.
It's such a pleasure reading a SPAG free chaapter, after what I've been reading on FS lately. Thank you for posting.
Being a southerner, you made a word jump out at me;tator. I've always spelled it, tater.
Please keep writing, I read it all, but most times I don't have anything to critique.
sloegin
Comment Written 23-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the kind review Tomorrow's post is a little light on action, but the following one, will definitely have some.
Comment from Neonewman
Outstanding piece, I certainly can see why it received the all time best ribbon. I love the taste of buffalo meat and have a little Indian in me as well. God Bless!
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Outstanding piece, I certainly can see why it received the all time best ribbon. I love the taste of buffalo meat and have a little Indian in me as well. God Bless!
Comment Written 23-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Loren (7)
Being from Oklahoma, I'm used to this question:) "Did you expect teepees or wigwams?" I liked the way you incorporated the native food into this chapter, too. I've eaten some of what you've indicated, but not all ... especially not the gators ...even if someone were to tell me they taste just like chicken :) Loren
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Being from Oklahoma, I'm used to this question:) "Did you expect teepees or wigwams?" I liked the way you incorporated the native food into this chapter, too. I've eaten some of what you've indicated, but not all ... especially not the gators ...even if someone were to tell me they taste just like chicken :) Loren
Comment Written 22-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from drivenbackward
A very quick and engaging read. Two notes to consider:
but usually around 600. -- Write out numbers in dialogue unless it's a large and confusing. I think 'six hundred' would work better here.
Hurry-up!" -- Hurry up!
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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A very quick and engaging read. Two notes to consider:
but usually around 600. -- Write out numbers in dialogue unless it's a large and confusing. I think 'six hundred' would work better here.
Hurry-up!" -- Hurry up!
Comment Written 22-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Yes, You are correct. I will fix that. Thank you for the reminder.
Comment from Cumbrianlass
I have tasted bison meat. Good chapter, Barbara. Very smooth, with a nice flow to the dialogue. I like Jim. I guess Soni is getting dressed for the celebration. I have attended native pow-wows in Ontario, and love them.
Look forward to the next.
Av
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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I have tasted bison meat. Good chapter, Barbara. Very smooth, with a nice flow to the dialogue. I like Jim. I guess Soni is getting dressed for the celebration. I have attended native pow-wows in Ontario, and love them.
Look forward to the next.
Av
Comment Written 22-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from donaldww
I'm wondering what the event is that Soni is participating in, and am looking forward to the next installment.
You got me with "coasterners." I had already jotted down a note to ask you about it before I read the next line!
Great job!
Cheers,
DW
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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I'm wondering what the event is that Soni is participating in, and am looking forward to the next installment.
You got me with "coasterners." I had already jotted down a note to ask you about it before I read the next line!
Great job!
Cheers,
DW
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Emily George
I enjoyed this story it is well written and the conversations between your characters are believable. I enjoyed hearing about the cultural traditions and the way they "look after the land and it will look after them."
Thankyou for a good read
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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I enjoyed this story it is well written and the conversations between your characters are believable. I enjoyed hearing about the cultural traditions and the way they "look after the land and it will look after them."
Thankyou for a good read
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from jaeladarling
Sounds like quite a feast! Lots of tasty things to choose from. And everything steeped in tradition - very cool! Great chapter. Looking forward to the next. :)
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Sounds like quite a feast! Lots of tasty things to choose from. And everything steeped in tradition - very cool! Great chapter. Looking forward to the next. :)
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the kind review.
