Comment from RGstar

Excellent

You have succeeded with your thesis or aim. Unrelenting pace in this write.
Good alliteration, suspense filled with the antagonist not identified by name.
Good eerie writing.
Good delivery.
Well done.
Best of luck, Steve.
Rgstar

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

RG, thanks for the warm review.

Steve

Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin

Excellent

Hi, Steve...

I really like this a lot.

However, the font seems to be screaming at me because it is so large. Perhaps a size smaller would be good.

Best of luck in the contest.

Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*.*)

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

Thanks, Jax - sorry about the screaming!

Steve

Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep

Exceptional

It worked for me, Steve, very well, and Pete thought it was brilliant! Good luck in the competition. It's unusual in its blackness demonstrating your versatility, Giddy

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

Thanks, Giddy (and Pete).

You're right, my poems seem to be getting a little darker, or perhaps it was just the feel of the trochaic rhythm in this one that drew me there.

Steve

Comment from angelface2

Excellent

Yes, Kiwisteveh, it works for me. It sounds a little like Edgar Allen Poe. Are you a goner?! I enjoyed reading it. thanks for sharing. Miss Sally

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

Thank you, Sally.

Yes, we all owe a lot to Poe...

Steve

Comment from perpetualwallflower

Excellent

I think your unstressed syllables work very well. You did a magnificent job on this poem and I think that your artwork matches your poem perfectly.

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

Thanks for th kind words.

Steve

Comment from fairydancer

Excellent

I think we're so used to reading iambic meter on this site, this makes a great change. Your words match the rhythm wonderfully.
Like the seasonal theme too.
Excellent ~ Cally :)

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

Thanks, Cally.

Haven't seen you around for a ....

Steve

reply by fairydancer on 15-Oct-2014

Well, you know... you try to dwell in a blissful fantasy on FS but reality will keep interrupting!
Had stuff to sort out... and still have... for a long time, so will not be here much, but will keep popping by occasionally ;)

Comment from judiverse

Excellent

This is lovely, and your rhyme is excellent. The flow is lovely. As far as I can tell, you are consistent in ending with an unaccented syllable. Your word choices add to the mood of foreboding. The howling wind and the ravens contribute to the dark mood of the poem. "It's you the grey man's seeking" makes a powerful ending. Oh, my, who is that shadowy man? Excellent work that casts a spell. judi

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

Judi, thanks a lot for the thoughtful review.

Steve

reply by judiverse on 15-Oct-2014

You're very welcome. judi

Comment from Sasha

Excellent

I read the rules to this contest several times and they only remind me why I am NOT a poet. My goodness, way to complicated for me. Despite not understanding the rules, I must say I definitely enjoyed this poem. Perfect for the season too. I do hope it meets the requirements and I sincerely wish you all the best.

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

Thanks, Sasha - yes, I'm well within the rules. I wasn't thinking of Halloween when I rote this - not traditionally celebrated here, but creeping in on the back of retailers....

Steve

Comment from Kingsland

Excellent

The stressed or unstressed syllables are not my forte. But what matter here is the message and the way the piece is delivered poetically. As that goes, this poem is excellently written and reads very smoothly. I enjoyed partaking of it... John

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

John, thanks for your very kind ords - glad you enjoyed.

Steve

Comment from INtity

Exceptional

Beautiful! I love the mythology and the imagery in this poem. I love the wordplay and the mysterious ending as well. Buffeted by winds, wave-tip spear-points.... awesome images! This reminds me of my poem Pazuzu's Rage which Pazuzu is the demon of storms and in your poem you use the God of storms. Love it and well done! I wish I could give it seven stars!

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Oct-2014

Thank you so much for the enthusiastic review and the six stars. I must look up your Pazuzu poem...

Steve