A Functional Drunk
A character study24 total reviews
Comment from Nosha17
Well written, enjoyable story, Quite ironic really that his family liked him better when he was a drunk and were totally unaware that he was teetotal. Well narrated, good dialogue, good strong story line and interesting characters. Faye
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
Well written, enjoyable story, Quite ironic really that his family liked him better when he was a drunk and were totally unaware that he was teetotal. Well narrated, good dialogue, good strong story line and interesting characters. Faye
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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Thanks so much.
Comment from sibhus
Yep, I don't know which end of the stick you were on the alcoholic, or the family memeber, but you really got this down pat. Excellent description that really show the stuation, I don't know how many times I have seen families break up after Daddy gets somber and isn't any fun anymore, or is not predictable anymore. At times i have thought about writng my own experiences down, but i have always thought no one would be interested in that crap, but this proves me wrong. This was a very interesting, well written story that was entertaing.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
Yep, I don't know which end of the stick you were on the alcoholic, or the family memeber, but you really got this down pat. Excellent description that really show the stuation, I don't know how many times I have seen families break up after Daddy gets somber and isn't any fun anymore, or is not predictable anymore. At times i have thought about writng my own experiences down, but i have always thought no one would be interested in that crap, but this proves me wrong. This was a very interesting, well written story that was entertaing.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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Everyone should write their own story. While this isn't mine, the underlying emotions are not strangers.
Comment from donaldww
Reflections of a crotchety drunk, sober enough, at the moment, to share his thoughts. Thus the title "Functional Drunk."
But the narrator quickly proves his functionality to be unreliable "I'm in the middle of an intervention and not one of these bastards realize I've been sober for forty days and forty nights."
He has no insight into why he needs intervention. The forty nights quip shows he has a Jesus complex.
"Who was I kidding? I've been self-medicating for decades--and it worked--for everybody. And sober--it's not working for anyone."
More faulty logic. Obviously he has no inkling of what everyone around him was going through.
"You're an asshole, Jerry." seems to sum him up quite nicely.
Excellent job!
Cheers,
DW
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
Reflections of a crotchety drunk, sober enough, at the moment, to share his thoughts. Thus the title "Functional Drunk."
But the narrator quickly proves his functionality to be unreliable "I'm in the middle of an intervention and not one of these bastards realize I've been sober for forty days and forty nights."
He has no insight into why he needs intervention. The forty nights quip shows he has a Jesus complex.
"Who was I kidding? I've been self-medicating for decades--and it worked--for everybody. And sober--it's not working for anyone."
More faulty logic. Obviously he has no inkling of what everyone around him was going through.
"You're an asshole, Jerry." seems to sum him up quite nicely.
Excellent job!
Cheers,
DW
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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You seem to have some experience with this world. This character suffers deep and chronic depression and has hidden it for years, especially from himself. Sobreity doesn't give him a second chance. Thanks.
Comment from GWHARGIS
I loved this because it was real. The whole 'it's not working for anyone' that was genius. Jerry's voice was true and I could picture everything about him. Thirteen year olds are hard to take and I could empathize with him. This was one of your best and that's saying something. Great work. Gretchen
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
I loved this because it was real. The whole 'it's not working for anyone' that was genius. Jerry's voice was true and I could picture everything about him. Thirteen year olds are hard to take and I could empathize with him. This was one of your best and that's saying something. Great work. Gretchen
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the many stars and kind words. I decided to get inside the heads of a few characters that might show up in future stories, and take stock of who they are.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
This is an extremely sad story. His brave effort went un-noticed by his family. His wife seemed to like him drunk better than sober. What a shame she didn't support him. I take it at the end he has decided to take his own life in the garage. He was a very unhappy man. Good story. Nancy
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
This is an extremely sad story. His brave effort went un-noticed by his family. His wife seemed to like him drunk better than sober. What a shame she didn't support him. I take it at the end he has decided to take his own life in the garage. He was a very unhappy man. Good story. Nancy
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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Many thanks for the kind words, especially for a sad story.
Comment from emrpoems
You certainly gave an excellent account of an alcoholic's life. It is amazing how people never take the time to assess anything. They fall into a habit just like the drunk does, only theirs is the habit of ridicule. With a little acknowledgement of his improvement things could have moved forward in the right direction. Well written and held my attention throughout
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
You certainly gave an excellent account of an alcoholic's life. It is amazing how people never take the time to assess anything. They fall into a habit just like the drunk does, only theirs is the habit of ridicule. With a little acknowledgement of his improvement things could have moved forward in the right direction. Well written and held my attention throughout
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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Thanks so much for all those stars. I appreciate the read.
Comment from Green Lake Girl
Excellently penned! What a surprise; a man finally gets sober and no one likes his sober personality. No longer anesthesized, he says what's on his mind, alienating everyone. You do such a great job of portraying a disappointing marriage and life. The cheating teenager; funny and sad all at once. A wonderfully complete story in an economy of words. Very well done!
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
Excellently penned! What a surprise; a man finally gets sober and no one likes his sober personality. No longer anesthesized, he says what's on his mind, alienating everyone. You do such a great job of portraying a disappointing marriage and life. The cheating teenager; funny and sad all at once. A wonderfully complete story in an economy of words. Very well done!
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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Sobreity might work for person, but often doesn't really work for those around him that don't like the new guy. Thanks for the stars and the read.
Comment from gypsycaravan
Wow. What a fabulous piece of writing. Absolutely NO spag to distract the reading. Metaphors and clever descriptions scattered liberally throughout the entire piece. The first two paragraphs are classic-terrific writing. I have an alcoholic stepson (recently deceased from alcohol at age 57) who was the same. His sober periods were so lonely because no one liked his personality then, so his drinking became necessary to him in order to fit in and be personally acceptable to others. So sad. I am in awe of the writing.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
Wow. What a fabulous piece of writing. Absolutely NO spag to distract the reading. Metaphors and clever descriptions scattered liberally throughout the entire piece. The first two paragraphs are classic-terrific writing. I have an alcoholic stepson (recently deceased from alcohol at age 57) who was the same. His sober periods were so lonely because no one liked his personality then, so his drinking became necessary to him in order to fit in and be personally acceptable to others. So sad. I am in awe of the writing.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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It happens more often than not that the sober individual has no common ground with people who have only known him drunk. Thanks for the generous stars.
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You are quite welcome and deserving.
Comment from Diny
No that was sad.... I can imagine it to be truth for someone, and your observations were exquisitely expressed. Bravo!
I had to go back and look if it was a contest piece - Nope just good solid prose!
Write on my pleasure to have stumbled upon this one tonight-
Di
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
No that was sad.... I can imagine it to be truth for someone, and your observations were exquisitely expressed. Bravo!
I had to go back and look if it was a contest piece - Nope just good solid prose!
Write on my pleasure to have stumbled upon this one tonight-
Di
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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Yes, it is a sad story, but more common than most people can imagine. Thanks.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
You've done a great job of getting inside the head of a man who gives up the drinking that's made his life almost tolerable to find life is worse when he's sober. Suicide is the logical next step and he's about to take it.
Your narration and dialog shift through time and space flawlessly. Professional stuff, Ingrid. :) Nancy
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
You've done a great job of getting inside the head of a man who gives up the drinking that's made his life almost tolerable to find life is worse when he's sober. Suicide is the logical next step and he's about to take it.
Your narration and dialog shift through time and space flawlessly. Professional stuff, Ingrid. :) Nancy
Comment Written 12-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2014
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Thanks so much for the generous stars. Enjoy the beach.