Ball and Chain
spiritual free verse36 total reviews
Comment from padumachitta
Hi Teresa. Well, it would make a good bluegrass kind of thing. Needs a bit of a bluesy feel, I think. But, hey ...I am a poet not a musicain. Sounds like a good bit of thinking though.
hope allis well.
padumachitta
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
Hi Teresa. Well, it would make a good bluegrass kind of thing. Needs a bit of a bluesy feel, I think. But, hey ...I am a poet not a musicain. Sounds like a good bit of thinking though.
hope allis well.
padumachitta
Comment Written 30-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
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thanks. i
'm good. had shoulder surgery last week. using only left hand. very tired but back to work part time. all well with you?
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Hey, shoulder OP, ouch. I hope it helps down the line. And back at work, wow, iron gal:-)
Yeah ok, a bit disillusioned with the Site, but it comes and goes...
Life here is a bit tough at the mo...so, maybe it is just all projection...but it will change...everyday is new.
padumachitta
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sorry about tough time. good way to look at it. you still looking for a house? take care.
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Hi Oh ya, house hunting, job hunting..word hunting...
I will light a candle for your health , if that is okay...padumachitta
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thank you:)
Comment from José Ángel
I liked your poem, the way you approach the issue of sin, the blame and like everyone has an outlet. Interesting work, well done and good expressed forms. Congratulations for your work, a hug from Chile.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
I liked your poem, the way you approach the issue of sin, the blame and like everyone has an outlet. Interesting work, well done and good expressed forms. Congratulations for your work, a hug from Chile.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
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thanks so much:)
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hey, Teresa....
AWESOME...six star worthy.
One minor tweak I observed by reading this like a song. It could just be me, BUT, (It) in the last line kind of throws the rhythm off in my head.
This ball and chain
has been laid down
it has been laid down
Instead, I'd just repeat the line
--- has been laid down ---
Another approach is you could keep rhythm by adding a couple of words ---
it has been laid down.
oh, yes, it has been laid down
For what it is worth, so use or lose, kiddo. Great job either way.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax (*.*)
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
Hey, Teresa....
AWESOME...six star worthy.
One minor tweak I observed by reading this like a song. It could just be me, BUT, (It) in the last line kind of throws the rhythm off in my head.
This ball and chain
has been laid down
it has been laid down
Instead, I'd just repeat the line
--- has been laid down ---
Another approach is you could keep rhythm by adding a couple of words ---
it has been laid down.
oh, yes, it has been laid down
For what it is worth, so use or lose, kiddo. Great job either way.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax (*.*)
Comment Written 30-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
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Thsnks for the six!!! i had it that way originally. I do agree as i read it again. thanks:)
Comment from Neonewman
Outstanding and proven to be true, I would love to hear the music behind this amazing creation. Jesus is the answer and is always by your side. God Bless!
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
Outstanding and proven to be true, I would love to hear the music behind this amazing creation. Jesus is the answer and is always by your side. God Bless!
Comment Written 30-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
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Thanks:)
Comment from patcelaw
Yes, writer these could be song lyrics. The words flow in such a way that they sing to me. As a person of faith and knowing how much Jesus did for me when He took my sin upon Himself I am awed. I want to praise Him and to do the best I can to bring honor to Him. Keep writing, Blessings, Pat
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reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
Yes, writer these could be song lyrics. The words flow in such a way that they sing to me. As a person of faith and knowing how much Jesus did for me when He took my sin upon Himself I am awed. I want to praise Him and to do the best I can to bring honor to Him. Keep writing, Blessings, Pat
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Comment Written 30-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
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thank you pat:)
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My life story has been made into a radio drama and is to start airing on Oct 5th (part 1)and Oct 12 (part2) at this link
www.oneplace.com/ministries/unshackled
God bless, Patricia lawrence
Comment from chasennov
spiritual free verse 'Ball and Chain.' This is a great spiritual poem you have managed to create here. More words have been used as inspiration from the Bible, than any other source on earth. Well done.
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reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
spiritual free verse 'Ball and Chain.' This is a great spiritual poem you have managed to create here. More words have been used as inspiration from the Bible, than any other source on earth. Well done.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2014
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thank you:)
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You are welcome.