Dear Brother Bill
Short Story37 total reviews
Comment from nancy_e_davis
What a nice story. Amazing what a small bit of whisky can do for a fella. He was able to visit with his son for a few minutes. I have a sister with Alzheimer's. It is so sad. Good story here. Nancy
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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What a nice story. Amazing what a small bit of whisky can do for a fella. He was able to visit with his son for a few minutes. I have a sister with Alzheimer's. It is so sad. Good story here. Nancy
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Thank you, Nancy, for your kind comments, and the stars! I see that you had a special understanding of this story, and probably guessed that it came from life.
Thanks again, irish
Comment from Ric Myworld
Thanks for the pleasure of reading your outstanding story. I try to spend at least one day a week, and more when I can, just walking around talking with people at a nursing home about an hour from where I live. Many don't remember our conversations for more than minutes, but I figure that getting them to smile once or twice is a success. Great Story. :-)
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Thanks for the pleasure of reading your outstanding story. I try to spend at least one day a week, and more when I can, just walking around talking with people at a nursing home about an hour from where I live. Many don't remember our conversations for more than minutes, but I figure that getting them to smile once or twice is a success. Great Story. :-)
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Thank you for your kind comments, Ric, and the stars. I appreciate hearing of your visits to the nursing home. It is appalling, how some of those poor, elderly people are abandoned. I am sure that your visits cheer them.
Thanks again, irish
Comment from Genya
This was a very interesting read and I enjoyed it from start to finish. Good dialogue between the characters in a well scripted story. It reminded me slightly of a film I once saw called the notebook. Really enjoyed reading this. Alzheimer's really is a dreadful illness and I have been so upset when spending time with people who have this condition. Terrible for everyone concerned. Really enjoyed reading. Genya
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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This was a very interesting read and I enjoyed it from start to finish. Good dialogue between the characters in a well scripted story. It reminded me slightly of a film I once saw called the notebook. Really enjoyed reading this. Alzheimer's really is a dreadful illness and I have been so upset when spending time with people who have this condition. Terrible for everyone concerned. Really enjoyed reading. Genya
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Thank you, Genya, for your kind comments, and your insight. I hold out hope for the latest research, finding a cure for this terrible disease. Thank you for the rating, and the stars. irish
Comment from jim lawler
That was a very touching few moments I just spent reading your story. It brought me close to tears. I take it, this is an actual account of someone dear to you. It is written superbly and needs no editing. I enjoyed it from start to finish. I connected with this story partly because I too have a loved one afflicted with dementia; my wife, she's about five years along and slowly slipping away from me. Good luck on your next endeavor. Jim Lawler
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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That was a very touching few moments I just spent reading your story. It brought me close to tears. I take it, this is an actual account of someone dear to you. It is written superbly and needs no editing. I enjoyed it from start to finish. I connected with this story partly because I too have a loved one afflicted with dementia; my wife, she's about five years along and slowly slipping away from me. Good luck on your next endeavor. Jim Lawler
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Jim, thank you so much for the exceptional rating and all those stars! I really appreciate your understanding, and you surmised that this was taken from life. Tragic to watch someone you love slip away, and I admire and applaud your efforts with your wife.
Thanks again, irish
Comment from rmj09
Very well written story under the genre of general fiction.
The focus is the old man and the developing storyline of the world the old man lives in.
The mental picture I had was of an elderly man in a nursing home. A visitor opens a letter and starts reading it. The old man refuses to take his pills for the nurse, but takes them from the young man who gives him Irish whiskey in water. We the readers discover the young man is his son and that the letter was written by the man when he discovered he had Alzheimer's.
The feelings I felt were surprise, interest and sadness.
This story hit close to home for 15 years I took care of my parents in their home for Alzheimer's. I worked during the day and had a caretaker stay with them until I got home.
Keep on writing.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Very well written story under the genre of general fiction.
The focus is the old man and the developing storyline of the world the old man lives in.
The mental picture I had was of an elderly man in a nursing home. A visitor opens a letter and starts reading it. The old man refuses to take his pills for the nurse, but takes them from the young man who gives him Irish whiskey in water. We the readers discover the young man is his son and that the letter was written by the man when he discovered he had Alzheimer's.
The feelings I felt were surprise, interest and sadness.
This story hit close to home for 15 years I took care of my parents in their home for Alzheimer's. I worked during the day and had a caretaker stay with them until I got home.
Keep on writing.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Thank you for your kind comments, and the stars. I can see you had a special understanding of this story, after your labor of love with your parents. This story was hard to write, but needed to be told. Thanks again, irish
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I'm sorry but I forgot to put the errors down.
...take the kids outside and show (chg then to them) the daffodils...
...Irene was an usher...and came back three (chg night to nights) in a row.
Sorry I forgot to put it down with my review.
Comment from Fridayauthor
This was a very nice story written with a lot of feeling. It flowed very well and I liked the mix of dialog and description.
You asked for criticism so I'll offer, at least my opinion for improvement.
I would drop the entire paragraph of the earliest memories. While it is nicely written, memory does not begin that early and it adds nothing that you don't say in the next paragraph when they are older.
Try not to repeat the same words close together. It's not a mistake; it simply doesn't sound smooth. Example...
...plastic chair and cross his legs... (Next line.)
Robert crossed his legs, ...
While the "cantaloupe?" line is humorous, it didn't seem to fit with the tone of the story. Just a personal opinion...
(I'd save it for another story where it was a better fit.)
Nice job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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This was a very nice story written with a lot of feeling. It flowed very well and I liked the mix of dialog and description.
You asked for criticism so I'll offer, at least my opinion for improvement.
I would drop the entire paragraph of the earliest memories. While it is nicely written, memory does not begin that early and it adds nothing that you don't say in the next paragraph when they are older.
Try not to repeat the same words close together. It's not a mistake; it simply doesn't sound smooth. Example...
...plastic chair and cross his legs... (Next line.)
Robert crossed his legs, ...
While the "cantaloupe?" line is humorous, it didn't seem to fit with the tone of the story. Just a personal opinion...
(I'd save it for another story where it was a better fit.)
Nice job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Thank you for your comments, and the stars. You are a sharp reader. Story was actually from real life experiences, and wrote "Robert crossed his legs,' to identify the visitor again, to the reader. 'Cantaloupe' story was included to relieve the pathos. And, I am blessed with a great memory, and can recall baths in the kitchen sink, and wet diapers that stank.
Thanks again, irish
Comment from c_lucas
It would be difficult for one to forget everything. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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It would be difficult for one to forget everything. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Thank you Charlie, had a hell of a time posting this and keeping the italics.
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HTML Italics end.EE has never been able to break HTML You're welcome Irish. Charlie
