Unexplained Vanishings
People are missing all over the world7 total reviews
Comment from Jay Squires
Not an original story, but well told. I had to deduct a star for the SPAG, but will return it upon your telling me the corrections were made.
Here with me is a woman that witnessed ["who" for animate, "that" for inanimate.]
Back to you ,Fitzerald." [misplacement of the comma.]
Fellow citizens, it saddens me [Paragraph spacing error. Also, no quote marks around the Mayor's dialogue.
Good writing...
Jay
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Here you go, as promised. Reads much better, now.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
Not an original story, but well told. I had to deduct a star for the SPAG, but will return it upon your telling me the corrections were made.
Here with me is a woman that witnessed ["who" for animate, "that" for inanimate.]
Back to you ,Fitzerald." [misplacement of the comma.]
Fellow citizens, it saddens me [Paragraph spacing error. Also, no quote marks around the Mayor's dialogue.
Good writing...
Jay
***********************************************************
Here you go, as promised. Reads much better, now.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Thank you for your good feedback and I will make the corrections. I made the corrections. Thank you again for taking your time to make these corrections of my work.
Comment from Writingfundimension
This is an interesting scenario and you provide a practical concern regarding those lifted up. That would create just the kind of chaos you describe well. Very inventive!
:) Bev
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
This is an interesting scenario and you provide a practical concern regarding those lifted up. That would create just the kind of chaos you describe well. Very inventive!
:) Bev
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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thank you for taking the time to write a review.
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You're very welcome.
Comment from GracieAnn
LL, this is a good write to remind or inform those about Jesus' second coming. Whether a person is pre, post rapturist or a millennial, we should live as if it is our last day on earth every day. Nice work. :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
LL, this is a good write to remind or inform those about Jesus' second coming. Whether a person is pre, post rapturist or a millennial, we should live as if it is our last day on earth every day. Nice work. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Thank you for taking your time to review.
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written. I did not see any errors. You did an accurate summation of the day of Resurrection. Your post has good imagery.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
This is very well written. I did not see any errors. You did an accurate summation of the day of Resurrection. Your post has good imagery.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Thank you for your review.
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You're welcome, LL. Charlie
Comment from adewpearl
Back to you, Fitzgerald. - add comma for direct address
You report the manner in which people vanish in excellent detail and create a mysterious sense of something really bizarre going on well
I assume from your Bible passage at the end that you are attributing the vanishings and all the destruction they bring to the second coming - nothing in my understanding of God would lead me to believe He would be part of causing wrecks and suffering like this. But you tell your story well. Brooke
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
Back to you, Fitzgerald. - add comma for direct address
You report the manner in which people vanish in excellent detail and create a mysterious sense of something really bizarre going on well
I assume from your Bible passage at the end that you are attributing the vanishings and all the destruction they bring to the second coming - nothing in my understanding of God would lead me to believe He would be part of causing wrecks and suffering like this. But you tell your story well. Brooke
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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I thank you for your corrections and how you always take your time to help make me a better writer. Even when you don't see eye to eye with my faith. God is a just God. He gave us His Holy word the Bible to tell us of what is going to happen. He has warned each of us that if we do not accept His son Jesus, we will face the tribulation, if we don't die first. He gave us a choice. He doesn't cause the pain or suffering, we do by the decision we make to either follow Him or deny Him. This is not what I made up, I live by the Holy Word Of God that is the Bible. I am sorry if this is too lengthy , but I am passionate about my faith. Thank you for always respecting my faith. Blessings, LyngLyng
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I admire the fact that you stand by your beliefs :-)
Comment from CHIGYSISKI
Very nice.I thoroughly enjoyed reading this and the rendition from the viewpoint of the media at the time of the occurrence of the rapture is innovative. Great job. I like the addition of scriptural references about the end time at the end of the write up.Well done!
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
Very nice.I thoroughly enjoyed reading this and the rendition from the viewpoint of the media at the time of the occurrence of the rapture is innovative. Great job. I like the addition of scriptural references about the end time at the end of the write up.Well done!
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Thank you for your encouraging review! Blessings, LyngLyng
Comment from Linda England Bonam
You did an awesome job of writing this! I didn't see anything that needed changed. Very timely for a piece like this, the way things are going in this country right now. And no, no one know when He will return, so be ready!!! This was worth a six in my opinion. You told the story smoothly and no glitches.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
You did an awesome job of writing this! I didn't see anything that needed changed. Very timely for a piece like this, the way things are going in this country right now. And no, no one know when He will return, so be ready!!! This was worth a six in my opinion. You told the story smoothly and no glitches.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Thank you Linda! We all need to be ready and warn our lost friends and loved ones. Blessings, LyngLyng