Magnificent Maria
Contest entry...please see notes if confused about language.19 total reviews
Comment from LadyCosgrove
Brilliant! I love this double edged sword. It reminds me of the film 'Kinky Boots'. You definitely have a way with words :-)
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2014
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Brilliant! I love this double edged sword. It reminds me of the film 'Kinky Boots'. You definitely have a way with words :-)
Comment Written 16-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2014
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Hello. Thanks for the review...I will have to look the film up, I do not know it. Thank you for the compliment:-) padumachitta
Comment from Just2Write
A great story, Padumachitta - No wonder it placed so well in the contest. Congratulations. I loved the down-home values of the protagonist and how you kept us wondering if the story would somehow twist back into the expected. It didn't.
Each time I thought I knew where you were going, you moved in another direction. Great writing.
Rose.
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2014
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A great story, Padumachitta - No wonder it placed so well in the contest. Congratulations. I loved the down-home values of the protagonist and how you kept us wondering if the story would somehow twist back into the expected. It didn't.
Each time I thought I knew where you were going, you moved in another direction. Great writing.
Rose.
Comment Written 13-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2014
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Hi Rose. Thank you for a grat reveiw. And just to let you know, I had no idea I had placed until I read your review! So thank you for letting me know:-) padumachitta
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I wondered if that might happen. The results of the contest just went up. R.
Comment from onebrit
I had no idea what was coming with this. I thought it was a woman singing. Well written, good descriptions, I'm not sure why it was a secret. Many female impersonators are proud of their ability to pass as women, takes more than makeup.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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I had no idea what was coming with this. I thought it was a woman singing. Well written, good descriptions, I'm not sure why it was a secret. Many female impersonators are proud of their ability to pass as women, takes more than makeup.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Hi. Thanks for the good review. Ah, but you see, he played at being Gay to get more fans...and he is a high school teacher...where I come from unless you are pretty much a WASP, you must be a little careful...
At any rate it was written for a bit of fun and in memory of one of my buddies back in the wild old days..
Thanks again...padumachitta
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, padumachitta, you did an excellent job writing this story about the way the man financed his house and provided for his family, but ended it quickly when it was paid for. I used to work with a female impersonator. his stage name was polly darton. made two thousand dollars a weekend. when he got into an argument with his "Husband" the husband threw his falsies in the garbage bin behind the hotel. good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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this is an excellent write, padumachitta, you did an excellent job writing this story about the way the man financed his house and provided for his family, but ended it quickly when it was paid for. I used to work with a female impersonator. his stage name was polly darton. made two thousand dollars a weekend. when he got into an argument with his "Husband" the husband threw his falsies in the garbage bin behind the hotel. good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Hi. Thanks for the great review. Ah, yes, I have known a few Drag Queens in my life. And they always seemed to have the most outrageous fun. Me too padumachitta
Comment from mikemagine
On thin ice, he didn't fall through...Mark. Very nice development, pace. Full characterizations, great dialogue. Fine job SHOWING...
Impeccable, far as I can tell.
Thanks!
Mike
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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On thin ice, he didn't fall through...Mark. Very nice development, pace. Full characterizations, great dialogue. Fine job SHOWING...
Impeccable, far as I can tell.
Thanks!
Mike
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Hi Mike. Thanks for your wonderful review. padumachitta
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Sure thing!! Very glad to:)
Mike
Comment from Jay Leeward
A truly excellent piece of work. The switch to Mark and 'he' was a bit of a surprise. Mark's wife, Mary, was a total surprise. I smiled at 'Maria's' wife being Mary and thought it a nice touch. Mark as a drama teacher is outstanding!
And just when the reader thinks he's safe, you sneak in this little gem. "He loved his boy. Still, it had to be done." Oh gawd, now what's he going to pull out of his hat? Poor reader. Up and down and up and down. Marvelous journey!
Minor spag notes: "The fans could turn like over bred Pit Bulls...". You may want to consider hyphenating -- over-bred.
"Let it go. You need to close this quote -- go."
A very strong contest entry. Good luck with this.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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A truly excellent piece of work. The switch to Mark and 'he' was a bit of a surprise. Mark's wife, Mary, was a total surprise. I smiled at 'Maria's' wife being Mary and thought it a nice touch. Mark as a drama teacher is outstanding!
And just when the reader thinks he's safe, you sneak in this little gem. "He loved his boy. Still, it had to be done." Oh gawd, now what's he going to pull out of his hat? Poor reader. Up and down and up and down. Marvelous journey!
Minor spag notes: "The fans could turn like over bred Pit Bulls...". You may want to consider hyphenating -- over-bred.
"Let it go. You need to close this quote -- go."
A very strong contest entry. Good luck with this.
Comment Written 01-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Hi Jay...thanks for a super review. I appreciate the detail and the help with spags and typos:-)
padumachitta
Comment from CHIGYSISKI
Nice twist to the story.I never imagined Maria was a male.Well done.Just goes to show the extent a need may push one to be creative and earn more to meet that need. Best of luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2014
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Nice twist to the story.I never imagined Maria was a male.Well done.Just goes to show the extent a need may push one to be creative and earn more to meet that need. Best of luck with the contest.
Comment Written 01-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2014
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Hi. Thank you for your review and comments. padumachitta
Comment from Spitfire
What a super job you did with this! When I looked at the picture, I thought "What an ugly girl. She looks like a man". The brows and arms gave that impression. The rest of her body looks like a Picasso rendering. Love the choice of symbolic songs considering the situation. I do wonder about her throwing off the wig. Wouldn't that reveal her as a him?
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2014
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What a super job you did with this! When I looked at the picture, I thought "What an ugly girl. She looks like a man". The brows and arms gave that impression. The rest of her body looks like a Picasso rendering. Love the choice of symbolic songs considering the situation. I do wonder about her throwing off the wig. Wouldn't that reveal her as a him?
Comment Written 31-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2014
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Hey Ya. Thanks for the great review(I do agree about the picture)Ah, the wig...see the thing is,he is a female impersonator, the tongue in check is that everyone thought her was gay(hence the fellas at the drag bar going bananas)...it was his wife and son he had to hide...
I wanted to make this longer to 'drag' it out more and make it clearer. However, I know anything much over 1200 words just doesn't get read.
Maybe I really should do a re write.
Thanks for helping me see a few problems...
padumachitta
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I get it now. "drag" it out. LOL Good one.
Comment from Cajungirl
Marvelous, well-written story. I didn't spot any SPAG. What a fantastic twist. Your entry should do very well in the contest. Best of luck.,
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2014
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Marvelous, well-written story. I didn't spot any SPAG. What a fantastic twist. Your entry should do very well in the contest. Best of luck.,
Comment Written 31-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2014
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Hi. Thank you for your review and comments.I am so glad you liked the twist. padumachitta
Comment from amahra
That was a nice well written short story. Full of great details for such a short piece. I loved your writing. It was very modern times and a great story. I often wondered how straight men could do that.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2014
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That was a nice well written short story. Full of great details for such a short piece. I loved your writing. It was very modern times and a great story. I often wondered how straight men could do that.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2014
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Hi. Thank you for your review and comments. They do it with a lot of make up and a sense of fun, I would say.-)padumachitta
