She brings the beauty....
The steadfast love...133 total reviews
Comment from Acquired Taste
This is sweet and very heart-warming. Keeping your grand daughter in God's light, His hand and His way is so important... and the fact that you acknowledge that she now is seemingly filled with those things is beautiful.
The photo is absolutely lovely. You are blessed. Keep her in God's way! AT=/
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2014
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This is sweet and very heart-warming. Keeping your grand daughter in God's light, His hand and His way is so important... and the fact that you acknowledge that she now is seemingly filled with those things is beautiful.
The photo is absolutely lovely. You are blessed. Keep her in God's way! AT=/
Comment Written 29-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2014
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Thank you so much for these lovely comments and review, blessings, Roy.
Comment from DR DIP
Really nice Roy and a beautiful photo of your grand daughter to accompany. We really do write with similar canter so I really do find reading your work so easy to get into the flow. 4 line rhyme, be it in AABB ABAB ABCB just seems so natural no wonder its my favourite form of poetry!
Thanks for sharing just one thing if I may be so bold to suggest and this is purely to create the appropriate pauses
the way I am reading it:
She brings the beauty with the morning,
Like grace; she brightens each new day,
Like the sparkle in the dew drop,
Like joy within, reveals His way!
Like a gem beyond all value,
Captures, holds God's holy light,
Like the dappled dancing plumage,
Of eagle's wings, in soaring flight.
Like the glory of the sunrise,
Chases shadows, conquers night,
She fills our cup, with hope's wonder,
Her candle glows, our heart's delight.
Just a few added commas, I feel, makes the reader hold the rhythm and the canter just my opinion I suppose
dip
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2014
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Really nice Roy and a beautiful photo of your grand daughter to accompany. We really do write with similar canter so I really do find reading your work so easy to get into the flow. 4 line rhyme, be it in AABB ABAB ABCB just seems so natural no wonder its my favourite form of poetry!
Thanks for sharing just one thing if I may be so bold to suggest and this is purely to create the appropriate pauses
the way I am reading it:
She brings the beauty with the morning,
Like grace; she brightens each new day,
Like the sparkle in the dew drop,
Like joy within, reveals His way!
Like a gem beyond all value,
Captures, holds God's holy light,
Like the dappled dancing plumage,
Of eagle's wings, in soaring flight.
Like the glory of the sunrise,
Chases shadows, conquers night,
She fills our cup, with hope's wonder,
Her candle glows, our heart's delight.
Just a few added commas, I feel, makes the reader hold the rhythm and the canter just my opinion I suppose
dip
Comment Written 29-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2014
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Thank,you Dip for the wonderful review and comments, and thanks for the tips, blessings, Roy
Comment from The Persisting
Well written, i really like the flow, and the way you used the punctuation...with lessons learned for my writing. Thank you.
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reply by the author on 29-Aug-2014
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Well written, i really like the flow, and the way you used the punctuation...with lessons learned for my writing. Thank you.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2014
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I have more in my portfolio, I will try to get to your poem over the weekend, I will perhaps help you to use the language t make, hopefully an impact! Thank you for the great review, blessings, Roy.
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Thanks Roy, much appreciated. God Bless
