Bel Air: A Bard's Guide
Viewing comments for Chapter 41 "The Prison is Leveled."Sequel to The Bard of Bel Air.
12 total reviews
Comment from Nosha17
Good story line with good use of descriptive language and well described action scenes. I hope her knowledge of caves serves her well and they get out of there. In my kids' adventure stories there was always a way out of dungeons etc. by pulling a ring on the wall or moving an immovable stone or through a whole in the roof. Enjoyable as always. Faye
Good story line with good use of descriptive language and well described action scenes. I hope her knowledge of caves serves her well and they get out of there. In my kids' adventure stories there was always a way out of dungeons etc. by pulling a ring on the wall or moving an immovable stone or through a whole in the roof. Enjoyable as always. Faye
Comment Written 21-Aug-2014
Comment from ProjectBluebook
Just a handful of children left, say eleven. I wonder how far them silver mine catacombs run? Do mines have air shafts leading to the surface? I would get as much distance from them as possible. The Bard is one poetry machine. He finds humor no matter how bleak things become -- it seems. Looks like the prison cells got flattened pretty good. How did that Barry survive? Say, one soldier has the loot? I would take the loot and abandon my mission. I t probably pays better. Looks pretty well penned. Nice chapter. Later ... count your doubloon, wackydo
Just a handful of children left, say eleven. I wonder how far them silver mine catacombs run? Do mines have air shafts leading to the surface? I would get as much distance from them as possible. The Bard is one poetry machine. He finds humor no matter how bleak things become -- it seems. Looks like the prison cells got flattened pretty good. How did that Barry survive? Say, one soldier has the loot? I would take the loot and abandon my mission. I t probably pays better. Looks pretty well penned. Nice chapter. Later ... count your doubloon, wackydo
Comment Written 20-Aug-2014
Comment from GracieAnn
Mikey, I wish I had suggestions, but I'm fresh out tonight. I think the flow of the story is steady and winding down nicely.Sergeants is such a weird word. Check spelling. :0 GracieAnn
Mikey, I wish I had suggestions, but I'm fresh out tonight. I think the flow of the story is steady and winding down nicely.Sergeants is such a weird word. Check spelling. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 20-Aug-2014
Comment from robina1978
I missed your chapter before this one but your intro makes it clear what happened. Now after a tense episode all are free and cared for.
I missed your chapter before this one but your intro makes it clear what happened. Now after a tense episode all are free and cared for.
Comment Written 19-Aug-2014
Comment from l.raven
you just have to love that Bard...what a heart of gold...ok!!! Michael....so of the kids made it out...but some are still trapped...and so is my beloved Bard...sigh...a great chapter Michael...love it!!! very well written....Luff Linda xxoo
you just have to love that Bard...what a heart of gold...ok!!! Michael....so of the kids made it out...but some are still trapped...and so is my beloved Bard...sigh...a great chapter Michael...love it!!! very well written....Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 19-Aug-2014
Comment from nordicgirl
This is a tough situation. Wow. Damage can still be done to that mine. Rescuers donnot even know it is there. Maybe communications can be established. But, still, they are in an abandoned mine!!! Great write. NG
This is a tough situation. Wow. Damage can still be done to that mine. Rescuers donnot even know it is there. Maybe communications can be established. But, still, they are in an abandoned mine!!! Great write. NG
Comment Written 18-Aug-2014
Comment from seaglass
The site ate my comments before I finished...again. so you may get two of these. I've always avoided caves so I have to advice how to get them out but it does seem you've killed off the bad guys so trials won't be necessary. We'll see haw you get yourself out of this, Mikey.
The site ate my comments before I finished...again. so you may get two of these. I've always avoided caves so I have to advice how to get them out but it does seem you've killed off the bad guys so trials won't be necessary. We'll see haw you get yourself out of this, Mikey.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2014
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the story. The kids and the team seem to be stuck in the mind. The bad guys are harming themselves by blowing up the only entrance they know about. There has always been more than one way to enter a mine. There are usually air holes. The good guys know The Bard. They are not giving up. The bad guys do not know about the FBI and the other troopers yet. Great work. Get those kids out!
I love the story. The kids and the team seem to be stuck in the mind. The bad guys are harming themselves by blowing up the only entrance they know about. There has always been more than one way to enter a mine. There are usually air holes. The good guys know The Bard. They are not giving up. The bad guys do not know about the FBI and the other troopers yet. Great work. Get those kids out!
Comment Written 18-Aug-2014
Comment from drivenbackward
No suggestions on plot. Your baby. Another smooth chapter. Just one small note to consider:
Somehow, everyone went on their way with a little smile on their faces. -- The word 'Somehow' is making me more aware of the author's presence. But, maybe it's just me.
No suggestions on plot. Your baby. Another smooth chapter. Just one small note to consider:
Somehow, everyone went on their way with a little smile on their faces. -- The word 'Somehow' is making me more aware of the author's presence. But, maybe it's just me.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2014
Comment from CR Delport
I've always suspected there was more to the Bard than just being nuts. Although things don't look too rosy for them in the mine, there is hope. Another well crafted chapter.
I've always suspected there was more to the Bard than just being nuts. Although things don't look too rosy for them in the mine, there is hope. Another well crafted chapter.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2014