Reviews from

When Johnny Comes Marching Home

fictionalized reality

34 total reviews 
Comment from maggieadams
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Such a sad and all too often true story. You have given this mother such a poignant voice and I read it with tears streaming down my face. I saw the prompt at the end, and you have nailed it.

 Comment Written 21-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2014
    I'm humbled, but glad you cried because these tragedies and sorrows are played out in every hospital, in every neighbourhood across the globe. Through compassion and empathy we might help each other face the inevitable.
Comment from Andrewajgblue
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Such a heartbreaking story, describing the daily battle this lady goes through, I thought it was so true to life that I was with her 100%, so well written, excellent ,
Andrew

 Comment Written 21-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2014
    Andrew, it is true. Only the characters and circumstances are fictionalized. Thanks for spending some time with me.
Comment from ujbhurtah
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Congratulations for the wonderful sharing experience you wrote for us, spiritual echo. The way you described the state of mind of the mother seeing his son suffering and wishing to die was exactly the duplicate of the state of mind my cousin had when she saw her son suffering in front of her. Just like your main character (the mother seeing her child suffering), my cousin was separated from her husband, an irresponsible guy who left her for another person. Just like your main character, the child who was suffering from cancer was the youngest child of the family, whereas the other ones were healthy and very difficult. You inspired me a lot through that text. Thank you so much!

 Comment Written 21-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 21-Jul-2014
    This was actually the second story I wrote for the prompt, having read the original and been in conversation with you, I sensed you were looking for some clarity. I molded the story to your original set of parameters because for me, it's just a story. For you, it's an effort to understand the process, the things you witnessed and felt at some deeper level. But like most, I don't have any answers. I can absorb and return the feelings of hopelessness that a mother who gave birth, swore to protect her child, is beaten down, and in her own mind, and perhaps others, fails.
Comment from emrpoems
Excellent
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I read your story out of curiosity and felt all the emotion you put into it. I wonder why people remain blind to the fact that cancer can be cured but depending on the traditional treatments will not help. Research other methods, check out alternative methods and you will soon be helping lots of those patients to return home. Hope you do
Very well penned piece and good luck in the contest.


There is already the cure for cancer but the authorities have kept in covered up to protect the industry. You should consult a doctor who practices alternative medicine. I know of many cancer patients who have been cure using simple methods and other alternative methods. Cancer cannot live in oxygen so research the methods of oxygenating your body. Hyperthermia is another way of curing cancer and it works.

Good luck in your fight against this cruel but curable disease.

/The%20Budwig%20Diet%20-%20Flaxseed%20Oil%20and%20Cottage%20Cheese.htm

http://www.cancertutor.com/Cancer/Budwig.html

paste these in the bar and see what you think

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2014
    That's not my job, it's yours. Mine was an emotional microscope looking at the lives of people who have been afflicted, their journey and either their victory or defeat.

    If you feel you have something more to offer, then you should or might, but it is certainly not my place to find solutions. I have been a chronicler, not a prophet and certainly, I have never held the answer in my hands.
Comment from Nosha17
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What brave people who have to go through this terrible illness, whether it be the patients or their families, they are all suffering. You have made good use of language in the narrative and descriptions and the story line is strong. Characters are well drawn and it read really well. Good luck in the contest. Faye

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2014
    I remember asking my friend, Mike Dinner, who not only was diagnosed with 4th stage leukemia, a week later he was in a car accident that snapped his spine and threw him over the shoulder of the road, out of sight. He crawled on his elbows to become visible and get help from motorists. I asked him how he survived. His simple answer was, "you play the cards you're dealt."

    He didn't make it in the end, but damn, he fought for life.
Comment from GWHARGIS
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This was an unwaivering look at the real deal. How life to keep a child alive is neither romantic or even rewarding at times. The other children resent the time away, and sometimes resent thee dying or sick child. Your prose was so real, that it almost brought me to tears. I kept referencing fiction in the top right hand corner. Great job as per your usual.

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2014
    You are so right, there is nothing romantic about being the hand that one clings to and I've been there which possibly why the emotions ring true--they are. Of course the story is not true, but the doubts, the competitive rage of those who should share the emotional doubts and compassion, often don't.

    Thanks for all the glowing stars. I really appreciate it.
Comment from adewpearl
Excellent
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before the doctor's found out - drop the apostrophe
what a gritty account of being the mom of a child with cancer as well as children who have to cope with all her attention and time being devoted to the sick one - compelling character development of the ex and his mother - you make this all seem so real besides being tragically unfair
Brooke

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2014
    Cancer is tragic and it happens to the whole family. We hear about bravery and heroism, but there is little written about the rage and despair of family members. Thanks for the apostrophe alert. I know better--shame on me, but thanks.
reply by adewpearl on 20-Jul-2014
    Reminds me of when Miranda was struggling with the conditions of Sawyer's twin, who died in utero - she had a frank and honest doctor who told her when you read those miracle stories about itsy bitsy preemies who live, that they don't tell you about the child's blindness and undeveloped lungs and mental deficiencies... We love happy endings and miracle cures and problems that are clean and neat
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2014
    Gosh, I didn't know. What a harsh, bittersweet reality. Thank God there is at least one smile left.

    I've always been able to deal better with a brutal truth than a sugar-coated pipe dream that does nothing more than delay the truth.
reply by adewpearl on 20-Jul-2014
    Sawyer is my daughter's reward for months of grief and dozens of doctor appointments and more shit than any young couple should ever have to grow through - he is so exceptional, and I always think of how much his twin's death contributed to his survival, like a noble sacrifice. Sawyer started to thrive once that precious little one was no longer complicating things, and every single time he does something remarkably advanced, I give a little nod of thanks to his brother.
Comment from abbasjoy
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is such a heartfelt story, that even though it is categorized as Fiction, it could very well be someone's life, and how they have to manage it, despite all that is going on.
When one child has cancer, and you have a support system in place, with friends and family assisting, it's one thing; but when you are deprived of that support, and have only a mother-in-law, who obviously doesn't care for you or your family very much, that is heart breaking.
Well written, and shows the reality of what Cancer can do to a child as well as their family.
Great job.

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2014
    Many thanks for the bouquet of stars and also totally understanding that cancer happens to everyone around the original victim.
Comment from Chrisfiore
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Spiritual Echo,

Good story, it is a tragic thing to watch helplessly as friends and relatives succumb to this dreaded disease.

A book? Hmmm... didn't know about that. Very good. Hope it works out well for you. ;) Chrisfiore

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2014
    Check out Page and Spine.com It's written under my name, Ingrid Thomson, and called 'Measuring Time.' The E-zine is published each Friday with a chapter every week. We're up to about chapter 12, but all previous chapters are archived on the site for anyone who wants to start at the beginning. Advisable, as each chapter, about 1000 words each can not stand alone.

    Thanks for stopping by. Don't see you here very often anymore.
Comment from Sasha
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is superbly written and brought up many not so fond memories of my own. Having someone there to help you through the difficult days is so important. I have known several that have fought this horrid disease and seen too many families fall apart in the process. Cancer is terrible, but when a child gets it, it is even harder to deal with. This is a very powerful story and a terrific entry for this contest. I wish you all the best.

 Comment Written 20-Jul-2014


reply by the author on 20-Jul-2014
    You have walked this journey several times and understand the battles and the emotional carnage that this stranger brings to lives.

    Thanks for all the stars.