Comment from Swagman

Excellent

I like the imagery of this short, effective poem - it reminds me of staring at the stars on a clear, cloudless night. I think the image/picture fits well with the theme and title. This has good structure, flow and simple language to understand. Very good.

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2005

Comment from Always_Hope

Excellent

A voice
quivers
forlorn
in yesterday's
warm breeze. - my favorite lines.

Your poetry is simply amazing! Enjoyed immensely!

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2005

Comment from LunarSecret

Excellent

What a peaceful poem, it is just the right length to capture and hold the readers attention.

Shadows
silently
floating
on my mind,
warm glow
on my breast,
reflections
of quiet
memories

I also love your line

lost words
cling to the stars

Take Care
Lunar
'

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2005

Comment from robeth

Excellent

Nice free verse, I can't find and technical things wrong with it. However, it did not stir an emotion or even really grab me. Maybe work on content of this poem a bit more and it could be great.

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2005

Comment from shelley kaye

Excellent

awesome write!!

"A voice
quivers
forlorn
in yesterday's
warm breeze.
Shadows
silently
floating
on my mind,
Songs
filled the night
from far away,
lost words
cling to the stars."


thank you for sharing :-)

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2005

Comment from Kingsland

Excellent

and the stars twinkle bright
in the warm moonlight
for the delight of one
until the sun arises
the twinkling stays in sight
to reflect in your eyes
until daylights reprise... John

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2005