Reviews from

haibun (needed rain)

contest entry

15 total reviews 
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
Excellent
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The prose in this haibun has some good concrete imagery portraying the thirsty garden. I like the double-meaning satori line of the haiku: "rainbow blossoms." Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer

 Comment Written 18-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 18-Jul-2014
    Thank you so. Jeanie. Have a blessed day
Comment from Patti R.
Excellent
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This is beautiful, Debbie and a strong contender as you've carefully followed all the rules set out for this contest. Dry, parched yards and gardens do seem to breather freer after a much needed and life-giving rain.

Good luck in the contest.

Patti

 Comment Written 18-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 18-Jul-2014
    Thank you so much, my friend~Debbie
Comment from Carolyn 'Deaton' Stephens
Excellent
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Dear Debbie,
As usual your Haibun is descriptive to the point of 'feeling the rain.' I loved the words, rainbow blossoms. Good luck in the contest.
Love, Carolyn

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 18-Jul-2014
    Tang to so very much. hugs, Debbie
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
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I read the rules for this contest and you followed them perfectly. The periods and no capital letters really through me. It's my problem, no yours. I did enjoy reading your post and it's a strong contest entry. Good luck.

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 16-Jul-2014
    Yes, I didn't understand that and it is not typically the way haibun are written. Thank you, my friend~Debbie
Comment from Capricorn30
Excellent
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This is a lovely haibun Debbie;
Rain satiates the needs of both earth and garden by providing nourishment;
"quenched and cleansed";
"rainbow blossoms"--this line serves also as the formation of a rainbow--in its own fashion, it blossoms.



 Comment Written 16-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 16-Jul-2014
    Thank you so very much, my friend. Glad you enjoyed it~Debbie
Comment from Jean Lutz
Excellent
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Your words bring refreshment, but let us continue to pray for those living in earth parchment. Great haibun and I wish you well in the contest.

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 16-Jul-2014
    Thank you, Jean. I heard an update on the water situation in Detroit. So far 15,000 have had their water shut of (I assume that is households, not people) Another 7,000 expected to be shut off yet this month. The Canadians are delivering water across the border as they are so horrified that the US allows this. Yes, I would gladly send them water if I could, but will have to settle for prayers. Take care, my friend~Debbie
reply by Jean Lutz on 16-Jul-2014
    I join with you in the prayers.
Comment from adewpearl
Excellent
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good assonance in mist persists
nice alliteration in nature's nectar
and linger on leaves
vivid detail of setting with good appeal to senses not limited to the visual
lovely pairing of haiku and prose sections
Brooke :-)

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 16-Jul-2014
    Thank you so very much, Brooke. I'm not sure why we couldn't use capitalization in the prose as it is usually written that way. Thank you for the great review. Take care, my friend~Debbie
Comment from shelley kaye
Excellent
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love those last drops lingering!

this was excellent. could ya send some of that needed rain to california, please? we REALLY need it lol!

great haibun! thank you for sharing and good luck in the contest :-)



 Comment Written 16-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 16-Jul-2014
    I'd love too. We've had too much here. Thank you for starting this contest and for your most very kind review~Debbie
Comment from Domino 2
Excellent
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Excellent terse and dramatic prose without waffle and word wastage, as this contest requires'

Top imagery too.

I really like your personified haiku too.

Good luck and best wishes, Ray.


 Comment Written 16-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 16-Jul-2014
    Thank you, my friend. Have a blessed day~Debbie
Comment from mumsyone
Excellent
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A great entry for the haibun contest, Debbie. It should do well. I thought about entering the contest until I saw the guidelines for it. Wishing you the best.

Hugs,
Lois

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2014

reply by the author on 16-Jul-2014
    Thank you. my friend. I wasn't sure about some of the guidelines, but need all the practice I can get. I even used some articles in it, LOL. Hugs~Debbie