Bel Air: A Bard's Guide
Viewing comments for Chapter 22 "The Bard's Hat, Kids On the Run"Sequel to The Bard of Bel Air.
13 total reviews
Comment from ravenblack
And now the thought dialogue of a cat? Risky. And it works well though stop with the urge to poke holes in your parachute. Birdman- maybe consider an entire story from an animal's perspective.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2014
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And now the thought dialogue of a cat? Risky. And it works well though stop with the urge to poke holes in your parachute. Birdman- maybe consider an entire story from an animal's perspective.
Comment Written 09-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2014
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I know. I need to get the quirky urges out of my system and get back to the story. One more little bit in the next chapter. Ha! Once Wayne Newton is out of the way my brain will return to whatever is normal for it...
Comment from ProjectBluebook
Like the hat. Man--I'm way behind. heluva chapter, Mikey. Lots of action going on. Reads smooth as silk. I was entertained. Saw no SPAG. I like the way you let us know where the scene is taking place. It's a big help. Looks good too. Got some more chapters to read. This was good stuff. Keep truckin' count your doubloon, Sir Mikey.
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Like the hat. Man--I'm way behind. heluva chapter, Mikey. Lots of action going on. Reads smooth as silk. I was entertained. Saw no SPAG. I like the way you let us know where the scene is taking place. It's a big help. Looks good too. Got some more chapters to read. This was good stuff. Keep truckin' count your doubloon, Sir Mikey.
Comment Written 09-Jul-2014
Comment from Nosha17
This was a great chapter, so much is going on at the same time. I liked the fun bit with the bard and the hat. Well written narrative and dialogue as always. Enjoyable read. Faye
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This was a great chapter, so much is going on at the same time. I liked the fun bit with the bard and the hat. Well written narrative and dialogue as always. Enjoyable read. Faye
Comment Written 08-Jul-2014
Comment from CR Delport
The Bard is a hoot as always. I love the cat talk. A pity nobody understood what he had to say. Angela and a few others got away. I just hope they can stay out of Elsa's hands. Another well crafted chapter with no obvious errors.
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The Bard is a hoot as always. I love the cat talk. A pity nobody understood what he had to say. Angela and a few others got away. I just hope they can stay out of Elsa's hands. Another well crafted chapter with no obvious errors.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2014
Comment from l.raven
hey you, I love Bards winks, thumbs ups, and peace signs...LOl...and now that Angela and some of her friends are free....Let them go!!! lets see what you come up with sweetie...go get them Michael....Love it!!! Luff Linda xxoo
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hey you, I love Bards winks, thumbs ups, and peace signs...LOl...and now that Angela and some of her friends are free....Let them go!!! lets see what you come up with sweetie...go get them Michael....Love it!!! Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 07-Jul-2014
Comment from GracieAnn
Mikey, the subtitles really help the reader make sense of all the different subplots that are going on simultaneously. The whole chapter has cohesiveness. Good hook at the end. Well done, my friend. :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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Mikey, the subtitles really help the reader make sense of all the different subplots that are going on simultaneously. The whole chapter has cohesiveness. Good hook at the end. Well done, my friend. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 06-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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I'm so pleased they help. It helps me too. That way I can jump around a little bit more and have things happening at the same time like they actually are. Thank you.!! mikey
Comment from seaglass
This is another very entertaining chapter. This is very flat desert country, (I use to horseback ride with cousins around the Vegas area) Hiding will be hard and it's very hot and dry especially if you have no water with you, . It will add excitement and realism to include details about that as these kids get away... or don't, whatever your plan.
Just a few things to look at...
"It says Samson on his (color), Sir." (collar)
"They find us there is no telling, Angela" (this sound a bit odd, did you need to add (and) or something?
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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This is another very entertaining chapter. This is very flat desert country, (I use to horseback ride with cousins around the Vegas area) Hiding will be hard and it's very hot and dry especially if you have no water with you, . It will add excitement and realism to include details about that as these kids get away... or don't, whatever your plan.
Just a few things to look at...
"It says Samson on his (color), Sir." (collar)
"They find us there is no telling, Angela" (this sound a bit odd, did you need to add (and) or something?
Comment Written 06-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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That's good to know. Apparently there is not much difference between that area and the area I'm in. That gives me a good picture of it. I'll look at that sentence. It does look strange now that you mention it. Thanks, mikey
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Very well done. Wonder what the Bard is up to.
I hope they don't catch all the kids. Let one escape and get out the word where they are, or else how will they ever be found? Or... do what you want, and I'll just enjoy reading it. :)
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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Very well done. Wonder what the Bard is up to.
I hope they don't catch all the kids. Let one escape and get out the word where they are, or else how will they ever be found? Or... do what you want, and I'll just enjoy reading it. :)
Comment Written 06-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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I have everybody running around everywhere now! I'm glad you are enjoying. Now, what to do....
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the story. There are a lot of things coming to a head. Winston is cornered by several groups. Elsa is in danger of being found out. Her daughter took off. Great work.
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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I love the story. There are a lot of things coming to a head. Winston is cornered by several groups. Elsa is in danger of being found out. Her daughter took off. Great work.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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Hi. So pleased you enjoyed this. Thank you so much for a great review. My head is in the clouds seeing stars!! mikey
Comment from Sankey
Good chapter again mate thanks for looking at my poem/songs Another great read in here found a couple of spags for ya ok!
snuk (snuck)
"It says Samson on his color,(collar)
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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Good chapter again mate thanks for looking at my poem/songs Another great read in here found a couple of spags for ya ok!
snuk (snuck)
"It says Samson on his color,(collar)
Comment Written 06-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2014
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Glad you liked this. I always spell that wrong, snuk, hahaha. It always looks wrong to me too! Then I see it spelled right and I wonder why it doesn't stick in my brain. Collar... good catch. mikey
