Should Droughts Deplete the Land
rhyming quatrains in 6//6/8/6129 total reviews
Comment from Dean Kuch
Ah-h-h-h... Oh-h-h-h-h, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, even tho' the sound of it is something quite atrocious, if you say it loud enough you'll always sound precocious, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!...or something like that, LOL.
I loved Mary Poppins as a child. Heck, I still do today. So it's no wonder why little Sawyer enjoys hearing that catchy word, or song.
Nice poetic tribute to the one who inundates your life with smiles, Brooke.
Great stuff!
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Ah-h-h-h... Oh-h-h-h-h, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, even tho' the sound of it is something quite atrocious, if you say it loud enough you'll always sound precocious, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!...or something like that, LOL.
I loved Mary Poppins as a child. Heck, I still do today. So it's no wonder why little Sawyer enjoys hearing that catchy word, or song.
Nice poetic tribute to the one who inundates your life with smiles, Brooke.
Great stuff!
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Dean, thank you so much. And he doesn't even realize yet that his mommy is a nanny just like Mary Poppins, minus the flying :-) Brooke
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What? You mean nannies don't really fly?! Now you've gone and broken my heart, Brooke (LOL).
You are always welcome, my friend.
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Don't be upset. Miranda might fly when I'm not watching. It wouldn't be the first time a child kept secrets from her mother :-)
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Aint THAT the truth!
Comment from angelface2
Oh my goodness, how sweet, Brooke. Such a lovely poem about someone so loving in your life. You have a great talent, Brooke. Miss Sally
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Oh my goodness, how sweet, Brooke. Such a lovely poem about someone so loving in your life. You have a great talent, Brooke. Miss Sally
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Miss Sally, thank you so much for your generous response to this poem :-) Brooke
Comment from whizpurr ^-^
Hi Pearly One,
After a few months away from FS, it was a delight to return and read your heart-grabbing poem that expressed so many sweet sentiments gracefully and sweetly. The expressive mug shots of your dandy little man topped it off perfectly. These little ones are so precious and dear.
Hugs, Aggie (W ^-^)
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Hi Pearly One,
After a few months away from FS, it was a delight to return and read your heart-grabbing poem that expressed so many sweet sentiments gracefully and sweetly. The expressive mug shots of your dandy little man topped it off perfectly. These little ones are so precious and dear.
Hugs, Aggie (W ^-^)
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Aggie, thank you so much for your generous response to this poem - it is always good to see you :-) Brooke
Comment from catch22
Hi Brooke, this reminds me of a song by the band Neutral Milk Hotel called In the Aeroplane over the Sea. You should have a listen on Youtube. This is one of my favorite messages in poetry and the greatest wish we can have in life--to die with no regrets or wondering what if. I'm a big fan of the 8/6/8/6 quatrain structure. My only criticism is that the following line read a little unnaturally to me because of the inverted syntax:
nor life shall I revile,
I don't have any quick fixes for this either. It's just a personal preference on mine.
Other than this, I love the photos of Sawyer. He's got to be the happiest child I've ever seen:) Take care.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Hi Brooke, this reminds me of a song by the band Neutral Milk Hotel called In the Aeroplane over the Sea. You should have a listen on Youtube. This is one of my favorite messages in poetry and the greatest wish we can have in life--to die with no regrets or wondering what if. I'm a big fan of the 8/6/8/6 quatrain structure. My only criticism is that the following line read a little unnaturally to me because of the inverted syntax:
nor life shall I revile,
I don't have any quick fixes for this either. It's just a personal preference on mine.
Other than this, I love the photos of Sawyer. He's got to be the happiest child I've ever seen:) Take care.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Gail, thank you so much for your thoughtful feedback. Even when I was composing the poem I wondered if someone would mention that line, but I decided I like and it would keep it. :-) And yes, he is an amazingly happy child, though his mother assures me he has his moments. LOL Brooke
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You're very welcome.
Comment from Terror2s
You really ought to try to get this one on a card. It is so warm and thoughtful. Thanks for sharing. I hope you are getting some visits with Sawyer this summer. T2
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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You really ought to try to get this one on a card. It is so warm and thoughtful. Thanks for sharing. I hope you are getting some visits with Sawyer this summer. T2
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Abby, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Domino 2
Hi, Brooke.
I haven't used, 'supercalifragilisticexpialidocious' in casual conversation for days now. ;-)
I find this one a rather 'abrupt' read, except for the last two flowing lines, though the meter is fine. However, as usual, the content is extremely interesting and poetically well expressed enough to make the reader think and be entertained.
Best wishes, Ray
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Hi, Brooke.
I haven't used, 'supercalifragilisticexpialidocious' in casual conversation for days now. ;-)
I find this one a rather 'abrupt' read, except for the last two flowing lines, though the meter is fine. However, as usual, the content is extremely interesting and poetically well expressed enough to make the reader think and be entertained.
Best wishes, Ray
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Thank you, Ray, for your thoughtful feedback :-) Brooke
Comment from DR DIP
thats is sweet and quaint and could be a pllied as a love poem to any lover and maybe the lines in a wedding vow but you have chosen sweetly for it to be about your grandson..again!! haha which is so sweet
thanks for sharing Brooke I really did like this one as it can be applied more generally for interpretation as well
dip
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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thats is sweet and quaint and could be a pllied as a love poem to any lover and maybe the lines in a wedding vow but you have chosen sweetly for it to be about your grandson..again!! haha which is so sweet
thanks for sharing Brooke I really did like this one as it can be applied more generally for interpretation as well
dip
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Thanks so much, dip - yes, there are many poems inspired by Sawyer that I intend to have broader applications :-) Brooke
Comment from ravenblack
Touched by our children, how can we ever revile life? Drought, seas vanishing- environmental threats, your clock echoes of the doomsday clock reflecting the conflicts blossoming all over the world- our children, their smiles are the spark of life that makes it all worthwhile. And all worth fighting for.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Touched by our children, how can we ever revile life? Drought, seas vanishing- environmental threats, your clock echoes of the doomsday clock reflecting the conflicts blossoming all over the world- our children, their smiles are the spark of life that makes it all worthwhile. And all worth fighting for.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Thanks so very much, ravenblack, for your thoughtful reading of this poem :-) Brooke
Comment from l.raven
Hi Brooke, it's funny how the smallest things can make us so happy...and bigger this not so much...I love your poem...and so love the pictures of Sawyer...so little to make this little guy smile...very well written...Luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Hi Brooke, it's funny how the smallest things can make us so happy...and bigger this not so much...I love your poem...and so love the pictures of Sawyer...so little to make this little guy smile...very well written...Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Thank you so much, Linda :-) Brooke
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your so welcome Brooke...xxoo
Comment from Joy Graham
I love the meter of your quatrains. It adds a special something to the overall feel of the poem. I must try it sometime. I'm thinking you used hyperbole in this theme to emphasize the affection you convey for Sawyer.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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I love the meter of your quatrains. It adds a special something to the overall feel of the poem. I must try it sometime. I'm thinking you used hyperbole in this theme to emphasize the affection you convey for Sawyer.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Joan, thank you so much for your generosity, and yes, I've certainly used a touch of hyperbole :-) Brooke
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I've not been called Joan before lol!
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Dear Lord - that is my headache talking LOL
