Bel Air: A Bard's Guide
Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "The Kids Arrive & So Does the Cat"Sequel to The Bard of Bel Air.
10 total reviews
Comment from GracieAnn
Mikey, the lay out is better with the breaks for me. ROTFLOL at "You mean like Biblically? Well... I'm blushing... Great use of sarcasm and humor in this chapter. A calm before the storm. Well done. I've been MIA dealing with stuff. :0 GracieAnn
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Mikey, the lay out is better with the breaks for me. ROTFLOL at "You mean like Biblically? Well... I'm blushing... Great use of sarcasm and humor in this chapter. A calm before the storm. Well done. I've been MIA dealing with stuff. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 23-Jun-2014
Comment from Nosha17
You are good at the descriptions of places that feature in your stories. Those details are useful to the reader. Your story has reached a high point, wonder what will happen next. Very believable, well written as always. Faye
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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You are good at the descriptions of places that feature in your stories. Those details are useful to the reader. Your story has reached a high point, wonder what will happen next. Very believable, well written as always. Faye
Comment Written 21-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Thank you for noticing. I try to remember to slow down and describe the landscape like you do!!! Now I got to get them into action! mikry
Comment from l.raven
Rolling along...singing a song...side by side...OK...Michael...Barry has landed...Angela is in a room of her own...she's not sure where she is at...and Bard and Lucky met a the elevator ...and got back on...and lets take it from there...I take it you like the movie Tomestone...I love it...later you...your doing great...Luff Linda xoox
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2014
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Rolling along...singing a song...side by side...OK...Michael...Barry has landed...Angela is in a room of her own...she's not sure where she is at...and Bard and Lucky met a the elevator ...and got back on...and lets take it from there...I take it you like the movie Tomestone...I love it...later you...your doing great...Luff Linda xoox
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2014
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YES!! LOVE Tombstone!! "I don't need to go heeled to get the jump on a tub like you!!" I have the movie memorized. Hahaha. I have all I can do not to let the Bard shoot him and say "You're no Daisy!!" mikey
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LMAO!!!!yes I misspelled Tombstone...sigh...you are a nut...Truly love it too!!!later you...have a great day...Luff
Comment from ravenblack
Doc Holliday and Planet of the Apes. Just hope that the bard has a dead eye for a dead shot when that elevator door opens. C'mon, plant some lead between Winston' s eyes. Good job keeping the suspense rolling throughout this chapter.
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2014
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Doc Holliday and Planet of the Apes. Just hope that the bard has a dead eye for a dead shot when that elevator door opens. C'mon, plant some lead between Winston' s eyes. Good job keeping the suspense rolling throughout this chapter.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2014
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Loooove Tombstone!! Doc Holliday's my favorite. Holding back as best as I can. Hahaha. I'll get Winston eventually. Might have to get medieval...
Comment from ProjectBluebook
Now, it's a waiting game ... waiting on that big pussycat. Idiots, they were tracked by that stupid cat. Mikey, I adored that phrase ... I'm your huckleberry. I heard them words on some weird show, can't recall. The suspense is thickening. I wonder how the negotiations will go down. Will the hoodlums want the loot first, before they reveal the kids location? How will they get it without being seen? There are cameras everywhere in a casino. Maybe, they will schedule to rendezvous someplace else for the exchange. This is very risky. Hard to pull this off, this day. This read smooth as glass. Although, I can read anything, little commas and such don't blockade me, ridiculous. I speculate ... some readers are spoiled. This is an excellent chapter Dismissed Sir Mikey. wackydo
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Now, it's a waiting game ... waiting on that big pussycat. Idiots, they were tracked by that stupid cat. Mikey, I adored that phrase ... I'm your huckleberry. I heard them words on some weird show, can't recall. The suspense is thickening. I wonder how the negotiations will go down. Will the hoodlums want the loot first, before they reveal the kids location? How will they get it without being seen? There are cameras everywhere in a casino. Maybe, they will schedule to rendezvous someplace else for the exchange. This is very risky. Hard to pull this off, this day. This read smooth as glass. Although, I can read anything, little commas and such don't blockade me, ridiculous. I speculate ... some readers are spoiled. This is an excellent chapter Dismissed Sir Mikey. wackydo
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Tombstone!! Wyatt Earp, Doc Holiday, one of my favorite movies. A must see. Yeah, good point. They'll have to meet somewhere outside of the Vegas lights and glitz. Eyes everywhere. Taken a day off, trying to catch up a little. mikey
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Me too, i got sidetracked,m was working on a chapter. Makes you feel good when you can get them free member dollars. it's addicting! I will check out your progress.
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
So Barry was about to shoot Winston and end everyone's misery when Winston tricked him, dammit. I want to see those kids get rescued, but I know you can't hurry it. :)
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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So Barry was about to shoot Winston and end everyone's misery when Winston tricked him, dammit. I want to see those kids get rescued, but I know you can't hurry it. :)
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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I really would like to hurry it too! I can't let Barry shoot him, he should be shot too. Maybe I'll have the cat shoot him!!
Comment from seaglass
There's good detail in this one; description of the cars and the room Angela, etc. This is fresh and bones of a story, the word pictures that make it real.
One thing to consider...
"Lucy noticed (him) slipping a bill to (him)."
I was told this can confuse readers when I did it. One of the 'hims'' should be identified.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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There's good detail in this one; description of the cars and the room Angela, etc. This is fresh and bones of a story, the word pictures that make it real.
One thing to consider...
"Lucy noticed (him) slipping a bill to (him)."
I was told this can confuse readers when I did it. One of the 'hims'' should be identified.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Yes, you are so right. I don't even know looking at it. I'll go and fix that. Pleased you noticed the detail, I'm trying to remember to do that. I should read one of your chapters before every writing session!! mikey
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I can't get over how I miss simple errors like commas and exclamation marks even though I re-read no les than 6 times.
Comment from nordicgirl
Excellent pace in this installment. I feel i can visualize the abandoned school. All thevplayers in place now. Now i see the importance of the kidnapping. It gives the situation a more cat and mouse feel. Care must be taken because of the persinal stake!! NG
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Excellent pace in this installment. I feel i can visualize the abandoned school. All thevplayers in place now. Now i see the importance of the kidnapping. It gives the situation a more cat and mouse feel. Care must be taken because of the persinal stake!! NG
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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So pleased. I was trying to add some detail and slow the pace a bit. Thank you so much. mikey
Comment from CR Delport
Yeah, Winston would definitely recognized them. I wondered how long it would take Angela to start feeling and behaving like a captive. Another good chapter with no obvious errors.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Yeah, Winston would definitely recognized them. I wondered how long it would take Angela to start feeling and behaving like a captive. Another good chapter with no obvious errors.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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I think she is just starting to feel that now. Good point. Thank you. mikey
Comment from Sankey
Good chapter seaglass says she is enjoying the ride as well glad you introduced me to her. Good work, only one little spag...
She'll be her(e) in a couple hours.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Good chapter seaglass says she is enjoying the ride as well glad you introduced me to her. Good work, only one little spag...
She'll be her(e) in a couple hours.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Great Gal. Here book just came out on Amazon. My Walls Speak, a dandy little story. That's next for us! Catching up. Got to get over and review. I know you have something posted over there!! mikey
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Thanks mate! Gotta get back to all the work I need to do on my Auto!! Grrrr!
