Bel Air: A Bard's Guide
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Flying Qantas"Sequel to The Bard of Bel Air.
9 total reviews
Comment from l.raven
OH Michael, the sky is falling...I love Bard...so now we have landed...and have to be careful around Susan...smiles...but the chip just turned a different way...so lets see where it goes...glad those windshield wipers were changed...Bard was about to jump...LOL...love it....Luff Linda xxoo love ya
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2014
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OH Michael, the sky is falling...I love Bard...so now we have landed...and have to be careful around Susan...smiles...but the chip just turned a different way...so lets see where it goes...glad those windshield wipers were changed...Bard was about to jump...LOL...love it....Luff Linda xxoo love ya
Comment Written 18-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2014
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I love the Bard too! When I flew to Nevada last year, I noticed the windshield wipers and that struck me as pretty funny. I guess I am the Bard. Hahaha. mikey
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I always knew you were...LMAO...on to the next chapter...had to eat some lunch...haven't been eating good lately...luff ya
Comment from nordicgirl
Another great chapter. Glad to see yhe focus shifting to Vegas now. Lots of possibilities there. Another awesome piece of poetry thrown in as a bonus. Captures something wonderful about our species for a change. NG
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Another great chapter. Glad to see yhe focus shifting to Vegas now. Lots of possibilities there. Another awesome piece of poetry thrown in as a bonus. Captures something wonderful about our species for a change. NG
Comment Written 17-Jun-2014
Comment from seaglass
More movement forward...we now get more scoop on Susan, what a gold digger. Luckily the cat hasn't passed the chip. I'll bet it got lodged in his intestine, hung up in a fur ball, no doubt. LOL
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More movement forward...we now get more scoop on Susan, what a gold digger. Luckily the cat hasn't passed the chip. I'll bet it got lodged in his intestine, hung up in a fur ball, no doubt. LOL
Comment Written 17-Jun-2014
Comment from ProjectBluebook
Mikey, how many people are coming to Vegas? Does it require two Lear jets? I'm puzzled? Where is Wayne Newton? Good idea with the period. Instead of using too many commas I can use a period. It pauses things pretty good I see. Get a few folks off my back. Don't know what it is but if I use any kind of stuff like ... or a hyphen or comma they are all over me. I believe I ruffled some feathers. I'm on the radar. When will that cat take a dump? I like, the Bard added. It's unique. This is your novel. You make the rules. Harper noted, that is good too. Your diversifying your vocabulary, nice work. See you make a new paragraph after a new subject is introduced. Hell yeah, Phyllis put the whip to me and woke me up, I give her that. I'm still confused about putting a , after but or and? Puzzles me. I want to believe too, Mikey. If you ain't got a dream, might as well be a fracking zombie. Statistics prove most ransom jobs, most villians get nabbed! They must have a devious plan. Wonder what the Bard is like, high? A scary thought ... Charming poem, wit of the Bard. Not everyone can add a poem. Takes perfect timing, has to be part of the story. Impressive. Not many can add such character to a novel. Many play it safe. Go for it! people get tired of the old ways, boring stuff, move over everyone, this is the future. Take note. Barry is a stool pigeon, basically a goon. He is a decoy. Route 15, that highway must run North/south. Usually odd numbers go north/south. The chase is on .... count your doubloons. Out of sixes, sorry mate. This is worthy. Great chapter. This is your story. wackydo
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Mikey, how many people are coming to Vegas? Does it require two Lear jets? I'm puzzled? Where is Wayne Newton? Good idea with the period. Instead of using too many commas I can use a period. It pauses things pretty good I see. Get a few folks off my back. Don't know what it is but if I use any kind of stuff like ... or a hyphen or comma they are all over me. I believe I ruffled some feathers. I'm on the radar. When will that cat take a dump? I like, the Bard added. It's unique. This is your novel. You make the rules. Harper noted, that is good too. Your diversifying your vocabulary, nice work. See you make a new paragraph after a new subject is introduced. Hell yeah, Phyllis put the whip to me and woke me up, I give her that. I'm still confused about putting a , after but or and? Puzzles me. I want to believe too, Mikey. If you ain't got a dream, might as well be a fracking zombie. Statistics prove most ransom jobs, most villians get nabbed! They must have a devious plan. Wonder what the Bard is like, high? A scary thought ... Charming poem, wit of the Bard. Not everyone can add a poem. Takes perfect timing, has to be part of the story. Impressive. Not many can add such character to a novel. Many play it safe. Go for it! people get tired of the old ways, boring stuff, move over everyone, this is the future. Take note. Barry is a stool pigeon, basically a goon. He is a decoy. Route 15, that highway must run North/south. Usually odd numbers go north/south. The chase is on .... count your doubloons. Out of sixes, sorry mate. This is worthy. Great chapter. This is your story. wackydo
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from ravenblack
Eek- right at the starting gate you have a tense problem- makes a call should be made a call. And Qantas does not have windshield wipers- just a guy chained outside with a rag.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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Eek- right at the starting gate you have a tense problem- makes a call should be made a call. And Qantas does not have windshield wipers- just a guy chained outside with a rag.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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Damn. I thought I fixed that. I had it right to begin with and then I changed it for some unknown reason. That is too funny. Hahaha. Even funnier knowing that it's true!!!
Comment from Eigle Rull
This piece was very nicely written in words that are easy to read and understand. It held my interest and attention very well. It had both a great story-line and dialog. I enjoyed reading it. It was excellent.
Always with respect,
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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This piece was very nicely written in words that are easy to read and understand. It held my interest and attention very well. It had both a great story-line and dialog. I enjoyed reading it. It was excellent.
Always with respect,
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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Wow. Some very encouraging words. That is so great to hear. Most appreciated. Thank you kindly, mikey
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
I see you took both my suggestions (flight plan and Susan's background). That's pretty cool. :)
Great chapter. So, in those red rock mountains, huh? Not many places to hide out there... hardly a tree. They'd hide a lot better in the city. But this is good... makes them easier to find.
>> Harpster pulled his cell phone out of his coat pocket and makes a call.
Should say MADE a call, for verb tense agreement.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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I see you took both my suggestions (flight plan and Susan's background). That's pretty cool. :)
Great chapter. So, in those red rock mountains, huh? Not many places to hide out there... hardly a tree. They'd hide a lot better in the city. But this is good... makes them easier to find.
>> Harpster pulled his cell phone out of his coat pocket and makes a call.
Should say MADE a call, for verb tense agreement.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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I was wondering about the terrain. No trees huh? Hmmm. I'll consider that. I had it "made", I don't know why I changed it. I always listen, you make good suggestions!! mikey
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My kid lives in Vegas. She's always hiking and rock climbing in those hills. It's largely desert and rock formations with only low-growing vegetation.
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Maybe he IS going to Vegas, but took that road IN CASE they were being followed, just to throw off anyone pursuing him. Most criminals are paranoid, you know.
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It's a good idea to do research BEFORE writing. LOL! Just use Google maps set to aerial view.
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Yeah! You read my mind. Hahahaha
Comment from CR Delport
Oh my word, Mike. You have me on the floor clutching my belly with laughter. The Bard is a hoot. I love it! Haha, the wipers are out! Brilliant!
Tenaya bent forward in the limo towards Lucy, --- Tenaya leaned toward Lucy, might sound better.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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Oh my word, Mike. You have me on the floor clutching my belly with laughter. The Bard is a hoot. I love it! Haha, the wipers are out! Brilliant!
Tenaya bent forward in the limo towards Lucy, --- Tenaya leaned toward Lucy, might sound better.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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I love the Bard, so much fun. He's liable to say anything. Oh yes, better on the sentence. Thank you.
Comment from Sankey
Fun, Fun, Fun till her daddy takes the T-Bird away!! I loved the Carpenters I miss them. Good chapter main spag is QANTAS! mate! QANTAS dude! No U Stands for Queensland and Northern Territory Air Service!
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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Fun, Fun, Fun till her daddy takes the T-Bird away!! I loved the Carpenters I miss them. Good chapter main spag is QANTAS! mate! QANTAS dude! No U Stands for Queensland and Northern Territory Air Service!
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2014
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I fixed that. There's a fix right from the source!! I was just going by the sound. From the movie "Rainman". Beachboys, yes.
