Surprise!
a kyrielle120 total reviews
Comment from A TARNISHED KNIGHT
Well ain't this just the cutest of poems..One thing that is not a surprise is that your work is always just darn right fantastic
TK
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Well ain't this just the cutest of poems..One thing that is not a surprise is that your work is always just darn right fantastic
TK
Comment Written 09-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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TK, thank you so very much :-) Brooke
Comment from rama devi
Love the emotional depth in the closing--a nice human example after all the great list of positive examples of animal's and transformational surprises. A very effect write. Lovely tone, pacing and fine rhyming and rhythm
Good alliteration and other poetic devices; I especially like the resonant R's here:
A raindrop finds a riverbed
Nice repeating line nice presentation. Nice mood and message!
Love,
rd
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Love the emotional depth in the closing--a nice human example after all the great list of positive examples of animal's and transformational surprises. A very effect write. Lovely tone, pacing and fine rhyming and rhythm
Good alliteration and other poetic devices; I especially like the resonant R's here:
A raindrop finds a riverbed
Nice repeating line nice presentation. Nice mood and message!
Love,
rd
Comment Written 09-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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rama devi, thank you so very much :-) Brooke
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:-)))))
Comment from Tomes Johnston
Surprises certainly do happen each day. I have been moved to a new building at work, but we have to be flexible in life and work. I suppose as long as I have a job I will not complain.
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Surprises certainly do happen each day. I have been moved to a new building at work, but we have to be flexible in life and work. I suppose as long as I have a job I will not complain.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Tomes, thank you so much :-) Brooke
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My pleasure.
Tom.
Comment from Opal H.
Mother nature sure does know how to make surprises happen. Indeed such lovely little surprises, such as a baby bird spreading its wee wings for the first time and surprising the world with new flight, or a cocoon you never noticed was there suddenly breaking and releasing a butterfly, would surely brighten anyone's day.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Mother nature sure does know how to make surprises happen. Indeed such lovely little surprises, such as a baby bird spreading its wee wings for the first time and surprising the world with new flight, or a cocoon you never noticed was there suddenly breaking and releasing a butterfly, would surely brighten anyone's day.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Opal, thank you so very much :-) Brooke
Comment from CR Delport
Ah look at the Cute Little One having fun on the beach with Daddy. Seems like those two are pretty close. This is very well written.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Ah look at the Cute Little One having fun on the beach with Daddy. Seems like those two are pretty close. This is very well written.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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CR, thank you so much. Yes, Sawyer and his daddy are extremely close, lucky to have each other :-) Brooke
Comment from krys123
Brooke, I truly enjoyed the picture which complements your writing so much with the persons in the photo being so surprised. Your writing is most descriptive, Interpretive and expressive in its imagery to explain how certain things can surprise and make one wonder from the creation of things to come. Your writing was most excellent and your rhythm flowed smoothly throughout your poem. Thank you so much for sharing am posting this for everyone and made the Lord bless you always Brooke.
Alex
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Brooke, I truly enjoyed the picture which complements your writing so much with the persons in the photo being so surprised. Your writing is most descriptive, Interpretive and expressive in its imagery to explain how certain things can surprise and make one wonder from the creation of things to come. Your writing was most excellent and your rhythm flowed smoothly throughout your poem. Thank you so much for sharing am posting this for everyone and made the Lord bless you always Brooke.
Alex
Comment Written 09-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Alex, thank you so much :-) Brooke
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You are so sincerely welcome Brooke
:-)
Alex
Comment from Leonardo Wild
Hi adewpearl,
A very nice poem about our changing world and the constant surprise given to us by nature. Very touching and insightful.
A suggestion:
--as if he crawls on feet of clay,
>>as if it crawled on feet of clay, <<
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Hi adewpearl,
A very nice poem about our changing world and the constant surprise given to us by nature. Very touching and insightful.
A suggestion:
--as if he crawls on feet of clay,
>>as if it crawled on feet of clay, <<
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Thank you, Leonardo, for your feedback :-) Brooke
Comment from STEPHEN A CARTER
LOVE THESE BITS:
A breeze/seeds Lovely intro
caterpillar creeps/crawls/ clay,
A robin's egg begins to break, love the 'b's
its blue perfection cracked away, A WOW!! line
A polliwog can't leave the creek, polliwog = memories
no legs to help him leap and play,
A raindrop finds a riverbed Love 'finds'
Well balanced, good strong flow makes this piece an excellent read. Love the pic..Sawyer of course!
Regards:
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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LOVE THESE BITS:
A breeze/seeds Lovely intro
caterpillar creeps/crawls/ clay,
A robin's egg begins to break, love the 'b's
its blue perfection cracked away, A WOW!! line
A polliwog can't leave the creek, polliwog = memories
no legs to help him leap and play,
A raindrop finds a riverbed Love 'finds'
Well balanced, good strong flow makes this piece an excellent read. Love the pic..Sawyer of course!
Regards:
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Thanks so much, Stephen :-) Brooke
Comment from poetbear
Great photo.
The magic of a child to share.
The ordinary is extraordinary because they share it.
Well written and constructed.
Reads and flows very well.
Many will be touched by it.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Great photo.
The magic of a child to share.
The ordinary is extraordinary because they share it.
Well written and constructed.
Reads and flows very well.
Many will be touched by it.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Maddy, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from judester
A wonderful poem about the little surprises that happen every day. Life is a beautiful cycle and unfolds around us every day. You appreciate this through the eyes of your grandchild and the cycle continues. I enjoyed this, cheers judester
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
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A wonderful poem about the little surprises that happen every day. Life is a beautiful cycle and unfolds around us every day. You appreciate this through the eyes of your grandchild and the cycle continues. I enjoyed this, cheers judester
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
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judester, thank you so much :-) Brooke
