Surprise!
a kyrielle120 total reviews
Comment from Righteous Riter
Good use of the abcb rhyme scheme. Good end rhyming. Good perfect rhyming with way/day. Good description and alliteration. Good rhythm and flow. Good complimentary photo followed by a clear message.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
  |
Good use of the abcb rhyme scheme. Good end rhyming. Good perfect rhyming with way/day. Good description and alliteration. Good rhythm and flow. Good complimentary photo followed by a clear message.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
Righteous Riter, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from lancellot
Interesting, style. a second line with matching end rhymes in each stanza. A common evolutionary theme of life changing forms. Yes, to a young person, it's a surprise that can happen everyday.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
|
Interesting, style. a second line with matching end rhymes in each stanza. A common evolutionary theme of life changing forms. Yes, to a young person, it's a surprise that can happen everyday.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
lancellot, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from nancyjam
I enjoyed your Kyrielle and the
examples of surprises each day holds.
Strong rhyme and meter carry this along,
as well as wonderful images .
Love the picture of Sawyer and his dad.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
|
I enjoyed your Kyrielle and the
examples of surprises each day holds.
Strong rhyme and meter carry this along,
as well as wonderful images .
Love the picture of Sawyer and his dad.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
nancy, thank you so much :-) I could kiss my son-in-law for how good he is with Sawyer :-) Brooke
Comment from angelface2
Nice poem, Brooke. Usually, you tell the meaning of the form. What exactly is a Kyrielle?, please. I like it. It has a nice flow. Miss Sally
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
|
Nice poem, Brooke. Usually, you tell the meaning of the form. What exactly is a Kyrielle?, please. I like it. It has a nice flow. Miss Sally
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
Miss Sally, thank you so much :-) A kyrielle is a poem of at least three quatrains with any rhyme scheme the poet chooses. The meter is iambic tetrameter. And each stanza ends with the same refrain line :-) Brooke
-
ok Thanks so much Brooke. I appreciate your taking time to explain.
Comment from l.raven
OMG Brooke, this one has to be framed...what a wonderful picture...Sawyer looks soooooooooooooo happy...he just loves seeing his father buried in the sand...I so remember when we did that as kids...what delightful picture...and the poem is wonderful...I love how you described the different things in nature...and how they change...amazing life is...so very well written Brooke...Luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
|
OMG Brooke, this one has to be framed...what a wonderful picture...Sawyer looks soooooooooooooo happy...he just loves seeing his father buried in the sand...I so remember when we did that as kids...what delightful picture...and the poem is wonderful...I love how you described the different things in nature...and how they change...amazing life is...so very well written Brooke...Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
Linda, thank you :-) Miranda is quiet, Andy is bigger than life, the kind of guy who commands the room. And he loves to act like an over-sized kid when he is around kids :-) Brooke
-
I think all men have that kid thing going on...my daughters husband is the same way...LOL...the cute they are...LOL..luff
your so welcome...xxoo
Comment from RodG
This is a delightful way of explaining to Sawyer how many things in life are unexpected surprises.
Great choice of subjects to illustrate your refrain: seeds becoming fields, caterpillars changing into butterflies, baby birds being born, et. al.
A nice change of focus in your final stanza where a secondary lesson is shared about the unexpected arrival of a friend.
Nicely done. Rod
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
|
This is a delightful way of explaining to Sawyer how many things in life are unexpected surprises.
Great choice of subjects to illustrate your refrain: seeds becoming fields, caterpillars changing into butterflies, baby birds being born, et. al.
A nice change of focus in your final stanza where a secondary lesson is shared about the unexpected arrival of a friend.
Nicely done. Rod
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
Rod, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from visionary1234
The kyrielle works well here Brooke - that last line echoes the way a child would say it: "Surprises happen every day". Simple, uncomplicated, no questions. Love the little twist you add to each one. I'd forgotten about kyrielles - they're quite a lovely form!
:)Sharyn
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
|
The kyrielle works well here Brooke - that last line echoes the way a child would say it: "Surprises happen every day". Simple, uncomplicated, no questions. Love the little twist you add to each one. I'd forgotten about kyrielles - they're quite a lovely form!
:)Sharyn
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
Than you so much, Sharyn :-) Brooke
Comment from Domino 2
Hi, Brooke.
a 'pollywog'? - is that Yank-speak for a tadpole?
Brilliant imagery of the caterpillar. Now I think of it, they do walk funny - as if they have 'feet of clay'.
I don't have any 'friends', and my 'door' has a loonie-bin lock on it. MWAHA!
Terrific read of imagination and poetic quality.
Best wishes, Ray
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
|
Hi, Brooke.
a 'pollywog'? - is that Yank-speak for a tadpole?
Brilliant imagery of the caterpillar. Now I think of it, they do walk funny - as if they have 'feet of clay'.
I don't have any 'friends', and my 'door' has a loonie-bin lock on it. MWAHA!
Terrific read of imagination and poetic quality.
Best wishes, Ray
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
Yep, Ray, it's a tadpole with a cuter name :-) Don't be a Debbie Downer - go out and find some friends! Brooke
-
LOL, Brooke.
In the UK, 'wog' is considered a very bad insult to black West Indians. Maybe a 'POLLY-wog' is a black parrot. Haha!
Another example of our different languages. LOL.
Ray xx
Comment from Tegan1311
A very well done poem. You use an easy flow of words and it's easy to understand. Although each paragraph is about something normal (the different stage of life in nature) you end each one with the reader thinking it's a small miracle. Well done.
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
|
A very well done poem. You use an easy flow of words and it's easy to understand. Although each paragraph is about something normal (the different stage of life in nature) you end each one with the reader thinking it's a small miracle. Well done.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
-
Tegan, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from kiwisteveh
I love your collection of natural events that each lead to a surprise ending. And of course you find a way to bind them all together with an ending of your own and relate everything to our human condition.
Wet and stormy today and a gloomy outlook - we could do with a friend at the door, although I fear most of them have too much sense to venture out in this!
Steve
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
|
I love your collection of natural events that each lead to a surprise ending. And of course you find a way to bind them all together with an ending of your own and relate everything to our human condition.
Wet and stormy today and a gloomy outlook - we could do with a friend at the door, although I fear most of them have too much sense to venture out in this!
Steve
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
-
Thank you so much, Steve, for your thoughtful reading :-) Brooke
