Bel Air: A Bard's Guide
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "Susan Surprises, Angela is Surprised"Sequel to The Bard of Bel Air.
10 total reviews
Comment from Michaelk
So we have the suspect narrowed down, and Susan is looking guilty. Would she really have her own child kidnapped? Maybe uncle Barry is a scapegoat and Susan is behind the whole thing. Tenaya seemed to pick up on Susan being less than honest. Is there more to it than just an affair? Good chapter. I look forward to the kids revolting.
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So we have the suspect narrowed down, and Susan is looking guilty. Would she really have her own child kidnapped? Maybe uncle Barry is a scapegoat and Susan is behind the whole thing. Tenaya seemed to pick up on Susan being less than honest. Is there more to it than just an affair? Good chapter. I look forward to the kids revolting.
Comment Written 10-Jun-2014
Comment from ravenblack
Wassup? I never received notification of this chapter. Salatia- is it a made up name or if not, what is the English equivalent? I'd change my name too. So far, I like your development of Angela.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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Wassup? I never received notification of this chapter. Salatia- is it a made up name or if not, what is the English equivalent? I'd change my name too. So far, I like your development of Angela.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2014
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I made it up. Wanted something that sounded like Salacious. I figured no one received a notice of this. That happened with my last book. Really messes things up. Glad you found it. mikey
Comment from l.raven
OMG Michael, sooooooooooooo many suspects...I'm losing count...LOL...and now I have to stop and wonder if Susan is one...her own daughter...and now lets see what Unc Barry has to say...later...very interesting...hummm... very well written sweetie...love it!!! Luff Linda xxoo
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OMG Michael, sooooooooooooo many suspects...I'm losing count...LOL...and now I have to stop and wonder if Susan is one...her own daughter...and now lets see what Unc Barry has to say...later...very interesting...hummm... very well written sweetie...love it!!! Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
Comment from Nosha17
This was a very well written chapter, with lots of new intrigue, complications and new sides to the characters. The dialogue and story line flow well and we learn much from the dialogue. Most enjoyable as always. Faye
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
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This was a very well written chapter, with lots of new intrigue, complications and new sides to the characters. The dialogue and story line flow well and we learn much from the dialogue. Most enjoyable as always. Faye
Comment Written 08-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2014
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So pleased you are enjoying this. Appreciate the encouragement. I do read these and am delighted with your responses. Just buried! mikey
Comment from seaglass
It's interesting to watch Angela become her own character. Having the spotlight on the kids makes for a nice twist. This family definitely have all the scummy secrets that often inhabit the elitist
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It's interesting to watch Angela become her own character. Having the spotlight on the kids makes for a nice twist. This family definitely have all the scummy secrets that often inhabit the elitist
Comment Written 06-Jun-2014
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Odd turn of events with eight kids on a boat with Barry. What could he possibly want with them?
Interesting plot and development... Just one comment on the technical aspect:
You have a habit of writing a whole paragraph of dialogue without indicating who is talking until near the end of it... very confusing. You might want to let us know WHO is speaking very early in the paragraph. In this chapter, you never did say who was speaking in the first paragraph... tho we could figure it out. SHouldn't be so much work for us readers, though.
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Odd turn of events with eight kids on a boat with Barry. What could he possibly want with them?
Interesting plot and development... Just one comment on the technical aspect:
You have a habit of writing a whole paragraph of dialogue without indicating who is talking until near the end of it... very confusing. You might want to let us know WHO is speaking very early in the paragraph. In this chapter, you never did say who was speaking in the first paragraph... tho we could figure it out. SHouldn't be so much work for us readers, though.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2014
Comment from Sankey
Great stuff mate. Seems to get warmer and warmer each chapter. I love the Bard you do him well. Wonder if he is related to one of your residents? Mind boggles ha!
Some spags...and comments...now getting crow(d)ed I don't think the crows are at it ha!
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Great stuff mate. Seems to get warmer and warmer each chapter. I love the Bard you do him well. Wonder if he is related to one of your residents? Mind boggles ha!
Some spags...and comments...now getting crow(d)ed I don't think the crows are at it ha!
Comment Written 06-Jun-2014
Comment from chasennov
"Susan Surprises, Angela is Surprised" I would obviously offer a number of suggestions, but this chapter was created quite remarkably in your ongoing Mystery and Crime Fiction series. Well done.
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"Susan Surprises, Angela is Surprised" I would obviously offer a number of suggestions, but this chapter was created quite remarkably in your ongoing Mystery and Crime Fiction series. Well done.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2014
Comment from nordicgirl
Love that picture! Great work here. This is great character development. These are some of the most real people thst I have ever encountered in literature. Even the Bard has great depth and is totally believable. Finally, some clues to the mystery and the sluething can begin. Lincolns role if any still unknown. Winston must be lurking around though he may not be involved in this. Cannot wait for more!! NG
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Love that picture! Great work here. This is great character development. These are some of the most real people thst I have ever encountered in literature. Even the Bard has great depth and is totally believable. Finally, some clues to the mystery and the sluething can begin. Lincolns role if any still unknown. Winston must be lurking around though he may not be involved in this. Cannot wait for more!! NG
Comment Written 06-Jun-2014
Comment from ProjectBluebook
A lot going on, but I kept up. This is turning into a mystery? That picture, is it a dancing banana? Funny. I saw Long Beach mentioned. Bet you have seen the Spruce Goose. I saw it once and the Queen Mary. So, uncle Barry reveals his mug. He must have some answers for the kidnapping. Guess, I got to wait and see what develops. Kidnapping Angela, why was that so important? That runs in me brain. Shipshape sailor. Did you see that awesome poem Dean wrote today. This was good. Dang, I went overboard, rated #101 as reviewer, lost me pen. I got to get her back. This should help somewhat. Seems like everyone is reviewing today, i can't get below 100, dang!
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A lot going on, but I kept up. This is turning into a mystery? That picture, is it a dancing banana? Funny. I saw Long Beach mentioned. Bet you have seen the Spruce Goose. I saw it once and the Queen Mary. So, uncle Barry reveals his mug. He must have some answers for the kidnapping. Guess, I got to wait and see what develops. Kidnapping Angela, why was that so important? That runs in me brain. Shipshape sailor. Did you see that awesome poem Dean wrote today. This was good. Dang, I went overboard, rated #101 as reviewer, lost me pen. I got to get her back. This should help somewhat. Seems like everyone is reviewing today, i can't get below 100, dang!
Comment Written 06-Jun-2014
