Deaddy Scare
An aging cop and his young daughter are threatened at home.53 total reviews
Comment from emrpoems
Very dramatic write that keeps the reader glued to the page.
Good use of dialogue and character interaction.
Good character development
Loved ending and how everything ties together
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Very dramatic write that keeps the reader glued to the page.
Good use of dialogue and character interaction.
Good character development
Loved ending and how everything ties together
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Well, this wasn't scary at all...except for the home invaders. Hahaha... Love to see the bad guys get their due. Surprised that the girl was an adult at the end, but that explains how she could kill with a knife... and her mother asked for it too. Happy endings are my favorite kind. :)
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Well, this wasn't scary at all...except for the home invaders. Hahaha... Love to see the bad guys get their due. Surprised that the girl was an adult at the end, but that explains how she could kill with a knife... and her mother asked for it too. Happy endings are my favorite kind. :)
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from Gungalo
Awesome Dean and scary for sure. It goes to show you what a mature imagination can concoct. LOL. Good luck in the contest.
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Awesome Dean and scary for sure. It goes to show you what a mature imagination can concoct. LOL. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from Green Lake Girl
I think Selena should be institutionalized! However, criminals did invade her personal space, so they had it coming. Well done story, Dean. Great twist at the end. You should do well in the contest!
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I think Selena should be institutionalized! However, criminals did invade her personal space, so they had it coming. Well done story, Dean. Great twist at the end. You should do well in the contest!
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from Spiritual Echo
I have to say that if I was your wife, I'd be terrified to close my eyes around you. Definitely a master at this stuff.
Why don't you check out Page and Spine.com They're sponsoring a flash fiction contest and I can see it now, "First Kill."
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I have to say that if I was your wife, I'd be terrified to close my eyes around you. Definitely a master at this stuff.
Why don't you check out Page and Spine.com They're sponsoring a flash fiction contest and I can see it now, "First Kill."
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from rod007
Excellent entry for the contest, Dean. Great dialogue and the twist at the end when we learn that the "Teddy bear" avenger is 27 makes the story awesome. Best of luck in the contest, my friend.
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Excellent entry for the contest, Dean. Great dialogue and the twist at the end when we learn that the "Teddy bear" avenger is 27 makes the story awesome. Best of luck in the contest, my friend.
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I have a teddy with his eye patched and his arm hanging off, I think I had best keep an eye on him! He is ancient. LOL, Where did this one come from? What a clever story, you hear about children who are 'special' having abusive parents. I bet they would all like to do what Selena did! Good luck in the contest, Dean. xsx Sandra
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I have a teddy with his eye patched and his arm hanging off, I think I had best keep an eye on him! He is ancient. LOL, Where did this one come from? What a clever story, you hear about children who are 'special' having abusive parents. I bet they would all like to do what Selena did! Good luck in the contest, Dean. xsx Sandra
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from Jackarrie
This is a brilliant write, it had me on the edge of my seat just reading it. A great twist in the end about the daughter. I enjoyed reading it, even though I am not into horror. the images were very impressive.
Very creative piece of work. Well done. Mary
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This is a brilliant write, it had me on the edge of my seat just reading it. A great twist in the end about the daughter. I enjoyed reading it, even though I am not into horror. the images were very impressive.
Very creative piece of work. Well done. Mary
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from adewpearl
Excellent dialogue throughout
good character development
You create and sustain suspense well
Fantastic reveal as we learn the age of the "child" and the back story
Dramatic and scream-worthy ending
Brooke
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Excellent dialogue throughout
good character development
You create and sustain suspense well
Fantastic reveal as we learn the age of the "child" and the back story
Dramatic and scream-worthy ending
Brooke
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
Comment from Andrewajgblue
This was brilliant as always, I loved the twist at the end, I really enjoy your stories, the characters were really well portrayed and the plot was fast ,
Great writing ,
Andrew
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This was brilliant as always, I loved the twist at the end, I really enjoy your stories, the characters were really well portrayed and the plot was fast ,
Great writing ,
Andrew
Comment Written 27-Apr-2014
