Sand In My Eyes
For all our veterans.74 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
This is a very gut wrenching musing of a soldier questioning his choice to fight. Is his killing a sin? Is it really what he thought of before he left? I always thought that once seeing the "enemy" might evoke a feeling of is this really what an enemy looks like? The governments are enemies not the people of the country.
The picture shows a girl at peace, like we all should be.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
This is a very gut wrenching musing of a soldier questioning his choice to fight. Is his killing a sin? Is it really what he thought of before he left? I always thought that once seeing the "enemy" might evoke a feeling of is this really what an enemy looks like? The governments are enemies not the people of the country.
The picture shows a girl at peace, like we all should be.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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Dragon,
Thank You Very Much.
Ward Hays
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No problem.
Joan
Comment from kiwijenny
This flat out gave me chills and goosebumps....I do not have a six left
But your power poem deserves the contest win....exceptional writing
God bless....and God bless the soldiers...I have sand in my eyes too
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
This flat out gave me chills and goosebumps....I do not have a six left
But your power poem deserves the contest win....exceptional writing
God bless....and God bless the soldiers...I have sand in my eyes too
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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Kiwijjenny,
Thank you very much.
Ward Hays
Comment from royowen
A very cleverly composed and contrived poem, there is no sin that Christ can't forgive, and none big enough to faze Him! So that's out of the way, and well tears?!? A very well written poem, great imagery woven into the readable narrative! I enjoyed it from beginning to end! Nice aabb rhyme, 1st three stanzas, then abab rhyme last 3, varied syllable count, but ok with me! Well done, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
A very cleverly composed and contrived poem, there is no sin that Christ can't forgive, and none big enough to faze Him! So that's out of the way, and well tears?!? A very well written poem, great imagery woven into the readable narrative! I enjoyed it from beginning to end! Nice aabb rhyme, 1st three stanzas, then abab rhyme last 3, varied syllable count, but ok with me! Well done, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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Royowen,
Thank you very much.
Ward Hays
Comment from linsbm
Beautiful interpretation of sand in your eyes. God sees everything in this world. Sins are just dirt that we can always remove if we want to. We should not be deceived by the beautiful cover of one's face behind the truth of goodness that dwells within us. God's eyes is perfect to see us through.
Excellent spiritual poem. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
Beautiful interpretation of sand in your eyes. God sees everything in this world. Sins are just dirt that we can always remove if we want to. We should not be deceived by the beautiful cover of one's face behind the truth of goodness that dwells within us. God's eyes is perfect to see us through.
Excellent spiritual poem. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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Linsbm,
Thank You very much.
Ward Hays
Comment from mumsyone
Congratulations on your win! Easy to see why your poem won the Spiritual contest. The message is heart-wrenching, especially the last two stanzas.
reply by the author on 05-May-2014
Congratulations on your win! Easy to see why your poem won the Spiritual contest. The message is heart-wrenching, especially the last two stanzas.
Comment Written 05-May-2014
reply by the author on 05-May-2014
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Thank you.
Comment from CR Delport
I can see why this was a winner. It is very well written and very well presented. It sure deserved to win. Well done and thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 05-May-2014
I can see why this was a winner. It is very well written and very well presented. It sure deserved to win. Well done and thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 05-May-2014
reply by the author on 05-May-2014
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Thank you very much for your kind review.
Ward Hays
Comment from Pegcook
"Sand In My Eyes" made my spirit weep. I believe that had I read this in a non-poetry delivery, it would have made my eyes weep, but not my spirit. This one will haunt me for a long, long time.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2014
"Sand In My Eyes" made my spirit weep. I believe that had I read this in a non-poetry delivery, it would have made my eyes weep, but not my spirit. This one will haunt me for a long, long time.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2014
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Thank you for your review. The story did not load properly but is now available in full. Please be so kind as to read the whole story.
Regards,
Ward Hays
Comment from BeasPeas
This is a well written and heartfelt poem that let's the reader glimpse the life of soldier performing his/her duty oversees in a dangerous environment. Congratulations on your win.
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2014
This is a well written and heartfelt poem that let's the reader glimpse the life of soldier performing his/her duty oversees in a dangerous environment. Congratulations on your win.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2014
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Thank You!
Comment from MagKing
Your piece is good but I still very much belief you need to work on the rhyme scheme. It is in total disorder.
Still you didn't include that in your notes.
But your write up is good with a fine concept.
Try editing before the end of the contest.
No offense.....
MagKing
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
Your piece is good but I still very much belief you need to work on the rhyme scheme. It is in total disorder.
Still you didn't include that in your notes.
But your write up is good with a fine concept.
Try editing before the end of the contest.
No offense.....
MagKing
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
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Thanks!
Comment from jEliza
I have never stood where you describe.
Your poem is full of emotions; sadness, anger, and acceptance that holds its own emotive power.
I have experienced misplaced trust in those who are there to be trusted, but and healing takes place over time.
Technically your words flow through the rhythm and end with and emotional jerk. (a tug not a stupid person!)
Thank you
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
I have never stood where you describe.
Your poem is full of emotions; sadness, anger, and acceptance that holds its own emotive power.
I have experienced misplaced trust in those who are there to be trusted, but and healing takes place over time.
Technically your words flow through the rhythm and end with and emotional jerk. (a tug not a stupid person!)
Thank you
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
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Thank You!