Life, Love, and Other Disasters
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Abandoned"A collection of poems on these themes
109 total reviews
Comment from catch22
Very nicely written and emotionally-charged poem for the ABAB contest. The rhythm is impeccable due to your use of trochees in the lines, and the rhymes were all pure and natural sounding. This is a very tough thing to pull off IMO. The story of regret and guilt comes through pretty clearly in your images of an abandoned house where once lived someone you loved. I wish you the best in the contest. This will be a very strong contender.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
  |
Very nicely written and emotionally-charged poem for the ABAB contest. The rhythm is impeccable due to your use of trochees in the lines, and the rhymes were all pure and natural sounding. This is a very tough thing to pull off IMO. The story of regret and guilt comes through pretty clearly in your images of an abandoned house where once lived someone you loved. I wish you the best in the contest. This will be a very strong contender.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
-
Gail, thanks so much for the thoughtful review.
Steve
Comment from LadyCosgrove
Fabulous! I have not read anything with such strong, well detailed mental images for quite a while. One to be extra proud of :-)
.............................
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
|
Fabulous! I have not read anything with such strong, well detailed mental images for quite a while. One to be extra proud of :-)
.............................
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
-
Thank you, My Lady.
Yes, I was pretty pleased with how this came out.
Steve
Comment from 1954speed
What a hauntingly beautiful poem! It portrays the very essence of love lost! And the broken reminder of that love is clearly depicted in the ramshackle cottage by the sea. Well said.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
|
What a hauntingly beautiful poem! It portrays the very essence of love lost! And the broken reminder of that love is clearly depicted in the ramshackle cottage by the sea. Well said.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
-
Thanks for the kind words.
Steve
Comment from GracieAnn
Steve, this ABAB Poetry Contest entry meets the elements of the contest and then some. It has the meter and tone of Edgar A. Poe's Raven, as well as, its tenor. Unique descriptive phrases in nearly every line-too many to mention here. Intriguing and interesting from start to finish. All the best in the contest! :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
 |
Steve, this ABAB Poetry Contest entry meets the elements of the contest and then some. It has the meter and tone of Edgar A. Poe's Raven, as well as, its tenor. Unique descriptive phrases in nearly every line-too many to mention here. Intriguing and interesting from start to finish. All the best in the contest! :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
-
Thanks, GA
You are not the first to find Poe-like qualities in this poem - perhaps he would have been even more melancholy.
Thanks for the six shiny stars too.
Steve
Comment from humpwhistle
Simply outstanding, Steve. A true word-painting (if there is such a thing). Vivid images of a delapidated cottage
reflecting the remains of a delapidated man still pining (angry) after his lost love. While the sea taunts.
(and while my guitar gently weeps).
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
|
Simply outstanding, Steve. A true word-painting (if there is such a thing). Vivid images of a delapidated cottage
reflecting the remains of a delapidated man still pining (angry) after his lost love. While the sea taunts.
(and while my guitar gently weeps).
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
-
Thanks, Lee.
Pretty happy with how this one emerged...
Steve
Comment from l.raven
Hi Steve, so very sad...your poem expresses very well the pain of a love that will never return...so very well written...and I love this picture...perfectttttt...luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
|
Hi Steve, so very sad...your poem expresses very well the pain of a love that will never return...so very well written...and I love this picture...perfectttttt...luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
-
Linda, thanks for the warm review.
Steve
-
sooooooooo welcome...have a wonderful Easter Day...luff Linda xxoo
Comment from Dawn Munro
Oh, this poem is heartbreaking! How stunningly beautiful, the tragedy fairly leaping from the screen. Nothing moves me more than eloquent poetry, rich with passion and fabulous imagery! This is exquisite, Steve - just masterful.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
|
Oh, this poem is heartbreaking! How stunningly beautiful, the tragedy fairly leaping from the screen. Nothing moves me more than eloquent poetry, rich with passion and fabulous imagery! This is exquisite, Steve - just masterful.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2014
-
Dawn, thanks so much for the enthusiastic review and the six stars.
Steve
-
It was my pleasure.
Comment from Dom G Robles
I love the poem with the sketch-art accompanying. The scene portrayed is vivid, and varied. The rhyme and rhythm, too,
captivated me. The figures of speech...the choice of words is one of a kind that I liked and admired. It was as if a storm came out in the night, devastating and creating havoc along its path...Very well written. I love reading this poem from beginning to end. Congratulations. Dom
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2014
|
I love the poem with the sketch-art accompanying. The scene portrayed is vivid, and varied. The rhyme and rhythm, too,
captivated me. The figures of speech...the choice of words is one of a kind that I liked and admired. It was as if a storm came out in the night, devastating and creating havoc along its path...Very well written. I love reading this poem from beginning to end. Congratulations. Dom
Comment Written 18-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2014
-
Dom, thanks so much for the kind words and the generous rating.
Steve
Comment from emrpoems
Good ABAB rhymes
Good use of alliteration
Excellent choice of words that create vivid imagery
Awesome presentation.sorry I don't have any sixes since this poem deserves one.
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2014
|
Good ABAB rhymes
Good use of alliteration
Excellent choice of words that create vivid imagery
Awesome presentation.sorry I don't have any sixes since this poem deserves one.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2014
-
Thanks for the kind words and the virtual six stars.
Steve
Comment from Lothlorien
This is a great poem! The descriptions are simply stupendous as they create a excellent vivid picture for the reader. It also brings out the emotion of appropriate sadness. Good luck to you in the contest!
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2014
|
This is a great poem! The descriptions are simply stupendous as they create a excellent vivid picture for the reader. It also brings out the emotion of appropriate sadness. Good luck to you in the contest!
Comment Written 18-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2014
-
Thank you!
Steve
