Reviews from

Finding Daisy

Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Oberon"
Another Ess and Oz comic fantasy

4 total reviews 
Comment from comanalbert
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Extraordinary chapter, surreal descriptions and real magic flowing throughout. Excellent details and dialogue. One thing though, should you notexplain why the king of fairies can't use his magic to find Daisy? It works on people.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2014


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2014
    In this universe they can 'glamour' people. I think the king has influenced Ess such that she cannot refuse to return after a week, but maybe I'll make that more obvious. Thanks for the review
reply by comanalbert on 15-Apr-2014
    That is obvious enough, but what if she comes without Daisy? That will kill your character. If she finds her, that will kill the story. More obvious should be that the fairies and their king can ONLY glamour people, their only power. That is why the king needs Ess , he can't do it himself...
Comment from Adri7enne
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow, snod! You've unleashed your imagination and it's such fun! I love how you described the transition into the other dimension.

Yeah, that was total fun! I had to shake myself awake, almost like Oz when it was all over. LOL! What a great imagination you have. And a great way of describing it all. Fun, snod! And don't be gone so long next time. Although, such a work of imagination might take a while to cook up, uh? Next!

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2014


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2014
    What? It was less than a week. Don't be greedy. Though I'm on holiday next week, so maybe I'll just have to tease. Thanks for the review. I must admit I wasn't too sure about this one. My descriptions (subject aside) doesn't often stray from the normal.
reply by Adri7enne on 15-Apr-2014
    Ah, you love me greedy! LOL! I shall expect a rundown of the holiday, too. More, more, give me more. LOL!
Comment from Briar172
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I entered your World reluctant. I enjoyed it nonetheless. More perhaps as I had no miss-thoughts. No preconceived ideas of what it was to walk there. Good job and I was taken by then story up and whirled away. Only suggestion for this is a bit more descriptive language.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2014


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2014
    Thanks. I'm glad I changed your mind, and guilty as charge. My dialogue is always stronger than my descriptive voice.
Comment from CR Delport
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I haven't read the previous chapters but this seems quite interesting. You think the king would be a little bit more grateful that someone want to help his daughter that might be in trouble. This is very well done.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2014


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2014
    You're very kind, thanks. Yes, he's a bit of a grump, isn't he.