A Scream Beyond the Darkness
Things aren't always what they seem to be...72 total reviews
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
Amazing.
Written with such control it still caught my attention and manipulated my response.
An impressive and very effective presentation.
It's great to know that your poetry can create this response and yet not leave physical or emotional scars.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Amazing.
Written with such control it still caught my attention and manipulated my response.
An impressive and very effective presentation.
It's great to know that your poetry can create this response and yet not leave physical or emotional scars.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Hah, yes, it is indeed, seken58. I'm so very glad that you enjoyed this one. Thanks for such a complimentary review.
Comment from CALLAHANMR
This poem is wonderful. Mood and atmosphere, suspense perfect. Can't get any better than that. The only thing that needs correction: perched it's neck. The possessive pronoun is its. It's is an abbreviation for it is. Great work, my friend.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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This poem is wonderful. Mood and atmosphere, suspense perfect. Can't get any better than that. The only thing that needs correction: perched it's neck. The possessive pronoun is its. It's is an abbreviation for it is. Great work, my friend.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thank you, CALLAHANMR, I really appreciate your kind and generous review. I will fix that error right away.
Comment from Domino 2
I'm often not a lover of author notes, Dean, especially when they seem needed to explain a poem's meaning, but yours here are interesting and educational, and they add substance to the read.
2nd line, maybe find a substitute for repeated 'glow' (also repeated later). Maybe something like:
'when sunshine's warmth dissolved to night'
I really like the alliteration and excellent metaphor in:
'with any freezing frigid air'
Again, I find the flow rather jumpy due to lack of meter, and yet again you counteract that by wonderful flow in your last stanza.
Entertaining and excellent as ever.
Best wishes, Ted
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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I'm often not a lover of author notes, Dean, especially when they seem needed to explain a poem's meaning, but yours here are interesting and educational, and they add substance to the read.
2nd line, maybe find a substitute for repeated 'glow' (also repeated later). Maybe something like:
'when sunshine's warmth dissolved to night'
I really like the alliteration and excellent metaphor in:
'with any freezing frigid air'
Again, I find the flow rather jumpy due to lack of meter, and yet again you counteract that by wonderful flow in your last stanza.
Entertaining and excellent as ever.
Best wishes, Ted
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thank you Ted, I truly appreciate that!
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It's always a pleasure to read your stuff and remain in contact, my gracious, talented friend.
Ted
Comment from perpetualwallflower
I really wish I had a six star review to give you. This is so beautiful. I love everything about this poem from the topic of owls to the wonderful use of vocabulary to the understanding that things aren't always what they seem. Love it!
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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I really wish I had a six star review to give you. This is so beautiful. I love everything about this poem from the topic of owls to the wonderful use of vocabulary to the understanding that things aren't always what they seem. Love it!
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thank you, perpetualwallflower. The fact that you enjoyed reading it is reward enough for me.
Comment from Louise Michelle
Hi Dean,
That image really does make me think he's sad. Hey, I just thought of something. We have owls here and I was remembering how someone told me how they'll swoop down and eat kittens off people's back porches, etc.
Maybe you might want to consider telling a tale like that. You could write about how hungry he was, couldn't help himself, but then felt regret.
Meanwhile, I really did enjoy this poem. I missed the background music, however. Even checked out my speaker to see if it was turned low. But that falling rain (or is it snow) is terrific.
Hugs,
Lou
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Hi Dean,
That image really does make me think he's sad. Hey, I just thought of something. We have owls here and I was remembering how someone told me how they'll swoop down and eat kittens off people's back porches, etc.
Maybe you might want to consider telling a tale like that. You could write about how hungry he was, couldn't help himself, but then felt regret.
Meanwhile, I really did enjoy this poem. I missed the background music, however. Even checked out my speaker to see if it was turned low. But that falling rain (or is it snow) is terrific.
Hugs,
Lou
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Hah, thanks, Lou. The only times you will hear sounds or music is if you see that the poem is a PICTAPOEM ©, and I will list it as such in the title. That way, people will know in advance to turn their speakers down prior to reading, should they not want to hear the sounds. Too many seem distracted by the music when reading poetry, so I've toned it down somewhat. However, it will always be an integral part of my PICTAPOEM © series.
Thanks so much for your kind review.
Comment from Andrewajgblue
So good, your rhyming was impeccable as always, some fantastic alliteration, I loved "he hung his head as if in shame " I can't believe I felt so sorry for a barn owl, really well done my friend,
Andrew
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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So good, your rhyming was impeccable as always, some fantastic alliteration, I loved "he hung his head as if in shame " I can't believe I felt so sorry for a barn owl, really well done my friend,
Andrew
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thanks very much, Andrew. I appreciate the read and review, my friend.
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I forgot to mention that fantastic picture at the end, it was amazing.
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That animated pic is one of my favorites in my collection.
Thanks again, Andrew, I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Dean
A dark night with an eerie sound-
has a tendency to yes put chills up your spine.
Then as I kept reading with your rhyming poem found out a was a 'very sad owl' not receiving a call back from its mate.
Write about a pack of wolves howling at night,
Now there is scary sound.
Gert
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Hello Dean
A dark night with an eerie sound-
has a tendency to yes put chills up your spine.
Then as I kept reading with your rhyming poem found out a was a 'very sad owl' not receiving a call back from its mate.
Write about a pack of wolves howling at night,
Now there is scary sound.
Gert
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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hah, perhaps I will now, Gert, thank you.
This is actually based on a true experience I had as a young boy. I heard the sounds -- what sounded like screaming -- and I just had to know what it was. I soon found out.
Thanks again!
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You are welcome Dean
Gert
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Dean Kuch,
Having heard the Barn Owl's screech ... yes, we do have them round here. According to one source I have read they also use that scream to scare their intended prey and make it 'freeze'. It certainly makes my Shelties jump.
Good poem on a great topic.
Patrick
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Hi Dean Kuch,
Having heard the Barn Owl's screech ... yes, we do have them round here. According to one source I have read they also use that scream to scare their intended prey and make it 'freeze'. It certainly makes my Shelties jump.
Good poem on a great topic.
Patrick
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thanks, Patrick. As this is based on an actual occurrence from when I was a young lad, I can certainly understand why it causes their prey to "freeze". It froze me dead in my tracks! Then, off in the distance, I caught a glimpse of a white face with huge eyes staring back at me. Naturally, I just had to know...
Comment from amada
Beautiful in its frightening. I went with you in this sad and dark story of the owl...My grandpa had a barn when I was a child, I just heard the wings moving. My fave lines for movement and alliteration "A-i-i-i-e-e-e!-- sentient silence split;
the shrieking grew much stronger."
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Beautiful in its frightening. I went with you in this sad and dark story of the owl...My grandpa had a barn when I was a child, I just heard the wings moving. My fave lines for movement and alliteration "A-i-i-i-e-e-e!-- sentient silence split;
the shrieking grew much stronger."
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thanks, amada. I'd hoped I was able to convey the sound they make using only words. I happy it came across to you as well as it did.
Thanks so much for your excellent review!
Comment from TAB_that's me
This was a little different than I imagined as I thought it would be creepy crawly, then just when I thought it was sort of peaceful, you throw in the line about it being on the wall - poor owl. Oh well, great write!
Teresa
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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This was a little different than I imagined as I thought it would be creepy crawly, then just when I thought it was sort of peaceful, you throw in the line about it being on the wall - poor owl. Oh well, great write!
Teresa
Comment Written 04-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Teresa. It is based on an actual experience I had as a young boy. I still remember how much the screaming terrified me, and of course, I just had to go out into the dark woods and fields to see what it was.
