I Wish I Were a Bumble Bee
rhyming quatrains in 8/7/8/7162 total reviews
Comment from mfowler
This is a sweet poem. A wish to be a bumble bee and a reflection on the essence of the creature's life; gathering sweetness. This becomes the metaphor for a desire expressed by the writer's voice to become a gatherer of life's sweet monets "wherever seeds of joy are sown". Excellent sentiment and great verse!
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2014
This is a sweet poem. A wish to be a bumble bee and a reflection on the essence of the creature's life; gathering sweetness. This becomes the metaphor for a desire expressed by the writer's voice to become a gatherer of life's sweet monets "wherever seeds of joy are sown". Excellent sentiment and great verse!
Comment Written 01-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2014
-
mfowler, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Bryana
Lovely poem Brooke, I always thought
bumble bees had a very busy life gathering
the sweetness from the flowers. It's a
pity I can't go too close to them, I'm
allergic to them and so are my son and
grandson. I rather see the busy creatures
be busy with their duties.
Hugs
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2014
Lovely poem Brooke, I always thought
bumble bees had a very busy life gathering
the sweetness from the flowers. It's a
pity I can't go too close to them, I'm
allergic to them and so are my son and
grandson. I rather see the busy creatures
be busy with their duties.
Hugs
Comment Written 01-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2014
-
Bryana, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from GracieAnn
Brooke, this poem has precise meter and rhyme that flows naturally with a simple universal message that utilizes a personification that works well. :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2014
Brooke, this poem has precise meter and rhyme that flows naturally with a simple universal message that utilizes a personification that works well. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 01-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2014
-
GracieAnn, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Mike Battaglia
Madam, if I may be blunt...
Of course this poem deserves a six star rating. Of course it does. But you do not need them, and there are far more on this site that need the ego boost than you. Furthermore, I feel no less than repetitive in my praise, for your standing and your talent is well documented and duly noted to almost all who belong to this website. Having said that...
This was absolutely wonderful. You have a knack for adding your trademark verve to any subject, turning even the most mundane of topics into a shooting star. That is your gift, and you know how to use it. This poem caught my eye for a reason, and I am no less than giddy to have allowed myself the guilty pleasure of reading it. I recall a comment of yours in one of your recent posts (I believe it was the butterfly butter one), in your author's notes. I cannot quote you verbatim, but essentially you were informing the readers to abandon any and all illusions of finding meaning in the poem. Shame on you, Brooke. Of all people you should know that despite what meaning you ascribe to your poems, despite where your inspiration comes from, once you set your poem free, it belongs to the world and what meaning they choose to draw from it.
This one had meaning for me (as did the butterfly one), for reasons no words can express. It was as beautiful as anything you write, as bright as the sun that shines. Thanks for this ;)
--Mike
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2014
Madam, if I may be blunt...
Of course this poem deserves a six star rating. Of course it does. But you do not need them, and there are far more on this site that need the ego boost than you. Furthermore, I feel no less than repetitive in my praise, for your standing and your talent is well documented and duly noted to almost all who belong to this website. Having said that...
This was absolutely wonderful. You have a knack for adding your trademark verve to any subject, turning even the most mundane of topics into a shooting star. That is your gift, and you know how to use it. This poem caught my eye for a reason, and I am no less than giddy to have allowed myself the guilty pleasure of reading it. I recall a comment of yours in one of your recent posts (I believe it was the butterfly butter one), in your author's notes. I cannot quote you verbatim, but essentially you were informing the readers to abandon any and all illusions of finding meaning in the poem. Shame on you, Brooke. Of all people you should know that despite what meaning you ascribe to your poems, despite where your inspiration comes from, once you set your poem free, it belongs to the world and what meaning they choose to draw from it.
This one had meaning for me (as did the butterfly one), for reasons no words can express. It was as beautiful as anything you write, as bright as the sun that shines. Thanks for this ;)
--Mike
Comment Written 01-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2014
-
Mike, thank you for your thoughtful comments. I appreciate your encouragement. :-) Brooke
Comment from Connie C
I like the positive tone of this, Brooke. We must recognize and grasp whatever joy we find in life just like the bumble bee who, as you say, harvests "drops of fragrant gold contained in every flower." You have such a knack for connecting elements of nature to human nature. As always, a joy to read.
Connie
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
I like the positive tone of this, Brooke. We must recognize and grasp whatever joy we find in life just like the bumble bee who, as you say, harvests "drops of fragrant gold contained in every flower." You have such a knack for connecting elements of nature to human nature. As always, a joy to read.
Connie
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
-
Connie,thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from DonandVicki
Thank you Brooke, another sign of spring that we all need to look for, just not to closely. This is a quite lovely work. Don and Vicki
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
Thank you Brooke, another sign of spring that we all need to look for, just not to closely. This is a quite lovely work. Don and Vicki
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
-
Don and Vicki, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Cumbrianlass
I read it out loud. Harvest drops of fragrant gold. What a gorgeous line! I love bumble bees too, with their heavy buzz and busy lives. Wonderful sentiment in the last stanza.
Av
I read it out loud. Harvest drops of fragrant gold. What a gorgeous line! I love bumble bees too, with their heavy buzz and busy lives. Wonderful sentiment in the last stanza.
Av
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
Comment from fastdigits
Ah the fantasy world of wishes masterfully
written in poetic and artistic fashion, with
the realistic commentary, take what life
gives you and make the most of it.
Another poem of magical words.
Well done
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
Ah the fantasy world of wishes masterfully
written in poetic and artistic fashion, with
the realistic commentary, take what life
gives you and make the most of it.
Another poem of magical words.
Well done
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
-
fastdigits, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from MissMerri
It is remarkable that Sawyer loves bumble bees. I imagine they would be fun to watch if there was no fear of a sting. He is quite a little guy and this is quite a lovely poem, with its frolicking rhythm and ABCB rhymes. But the reason I really adore the poem is for its final stanza which expresses what I'm sure must be Sawyer's philosophy of life. He is always so happy-looking with his large twinkling eyes. Your poem expresses this joy so beautifully. I really like it.
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
It is remarkable that Sawyer loves bumble bees. I imagine they would be fun to watch if there was no fear of a sting. He is quite a little guy and this is quite a lovely poem, with its frolicking rhythm and ABCB rhymes. But the reason I really adore the poem is for its final stanza which expresses what I'm sure must be Sawyer's philosophy of life. He is always so happy-looking with his large twinkling eyes. Your poem expresses this joy so beautifully. I really like it.
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
-
Adonna, I think he loves them because of his picture books and because of the sound of the word. I'm sure he's never been stung yet. Thanks so much :-) Brooke
-
Of course! That makes perfect sense. They are amazing little creatures, in books. :p
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Brooke
I looked for the music "Flight of the Bumblebee" in youtube, and read your poem through parts of it. It works very well.
http://youtu.be/6QV1RGMLUKE
Of course, I had to read it very fast to keep up with the music, but bees are fast critters despite their chubby bodies and big butts, with sacks of nectar hanging from each side.
I like your alliteration, "bumble bee" and "awash in waves", and "perfumed pools".
Kids would like the nonsense of your turning into a bumble bee, and flying over fields of clover.
"I wish I were a bumble bee
exploring fields of clover"
"I'd harvest drops of fragrant gold
contained in every flower"
But you come back down to earth in your final verse,
"But since I'm not a bumble bee,
I'll gather in the sweetness
wherever seeds of joy are sown
in fields of life's completeness." ... I like your message, that joy completes life. How true! Only you could say it so beautifully.
Nicely penned!
your ardent fan,
Kimbob
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
Hi Brooke
I looked for the music "Flight of the Bumblebee" in youtube, and read your poem through parts of it. It works very well.
http://youtu.be/6QV1RGMLUKE
Of course, I had to read it very fast to keep up with the music, but bees are fast critters despite their chubby bodies and big butts, with sacks of nectar hanging from each side.
I like your alliteration, "bumble bee" and "awash in waves", and "perfumed pools".
Kids would like the nonsense of your turning into a bumble bee, and flying over fields of clover.
"I wish I were a bumble bee
exploring fields of clover"
"I'd harvest drops of fragrant gold
contained in every flower"
But you come back down to earth in your final verse,
"But since I'm not a bumble bee,
I'll gather in the sweetness
wherever seeds of joy are sown
in fields of life's completeness." ... I like your message, that joy completes life. How true! Only you could say it so beautifully.
Nicely penned!
your ardent fan,
Kimbob
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
-
Chubby bodies and big butts - thanks for the smile :-) Thank you, Kimbob, for another great review :-) Brooke