I Wish I Were a Bumble Bee
rhyming quatrains in 8/7/8/7162 total reviews
Comment from nancyjam
Beautifully rhymed and metered
quatrains.
This is a delightful look at
bees and their work in the fields.
I like the comparison to human
gathering of sweetness. Nancy
Beautifully rhymed and metered
quatrains.
This is a delightful look at
bees and their work in the fields.
I like the comparison to human
gathering of sweetness. Nancy
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
Comment from Joy Graham
A delightful theme about bumblebees. Makes me think of the song "I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee..." I especially enjoyed your seven syllable lines that have the feel of feminine line endings. Great rhymes and meter, as always. Point me in the direction of those "fields of life's completeness".
A delightful theme about bumblebees. Makes me think of the song "I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee..." I especially enjoyed your seven syllable lines that have the feel of feminine line endings. Great rhymes and meter, as always. Point me in the direction of those "fields of life's completeness".
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
Comment from closetpoetjester
Hmmm, I should think I might want to be a bumblebee after this enchanting romp through the complete sweetness Brooke.
Your way with nature continues to astound and delight me. Boy is that boy spoilt with your talent...he is not featured IN this one, but you wrote it for him...how lovely he appreciates the little buzzers...I'm thinking he is going to applaud this one as the "bees knees" hahaha
Great work...cheers Phillippa xo
Hmmm, I should think I might want to be a bumblebee after this enchanting romp through the complete sweetness Brooke.
Your way with nature continues to astound and delight me. Boy is that boy spoilt with your talent...he is not featured IN this one, but you wrote it for him...how lovely he appreciates the little buzzers...I'm thinking he is going to applaud this one as the "bees knees" hahaha
Great work...cheers Phillippa xo
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
Comment from jmdg1954
That little boy better be careful following the bumble bees. They won't care that he's a little tyke.
You poem was interesting, well rhymed and has a smooth flow.
Just pity the bumblebees who buzz around my deck, pool or flowers... They'll be met by a badminton racket!
Nicely done, John
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
That little boy better be careful following the bumble bees. They won't care that he's a little tyke.
You poem was interesting, well rhymed and has a smooth flow.
Just pity the bumblebees who buzz around my deck, pool or flowers... They'll be met by a badminton racket!
Nicely done, John
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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John, thanks so much :-) I'll warn him about the bees ;-) Brooke
Comment from Lysa Schuler
This was a perfect poem. Meter and rhyme were perfectly timed. Structure made it easy to follow. the poem flowed gracefully, and was fun to read. Excellent writ, and God bless.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
This was a perfect poem. Meter and rhyme were perfectly timed. Structure made it easy to follow. the poem flowed gracefully, and was fun to read. Excellent writ, and God bless.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Lysa, thank you so much for your encouraging and generous review :-) Brooke
Comment from Adri7enne
Oh, I yearn for the days when I might see a bee. LOL! Snow again today! Sigh! I envy the bee, not having to go out and shovel again in the morning.
Lovely bit of whimsy. Wave your magic wand out there, will you? I'm a prisoner in the land of "Frozen".
Brought up good images, Brooke. Loved the artwork.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
Oh, I yearn for the days when I might see a bee. LOL! Snow again today! Sigh! I envy the bee, not having to go out and shovel again in the morning.
Lovely bit of whimsy. Wave your magic wand out there, will you? I'm a prisoner in the land of "Frozen".
Brought up good images, Brooke. Loved the artwork.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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God finally decided to like Pennsylvania - we've had nothing but rain for the past three days, but it's rain, not snow. LOL Thanks so much, Adrienne :-) Brooke
Comment from Andrewajgblue
I thought this was so good, the storytelling was great, and the rhyme was really precise,good alliteration in perfumed pools, and awash in waves, the flow was perfect, and finally a great picture to enhance the poem , I really enjoyed it ( I love rhyme ) well done,
Andrew
I thought this was so good, the storytelling was great, and the rhyme was really precise,good alliteration in perfumed pools, and awash in waves, the flow was perfect, and finally a great picture to enhance the poem , I really enjoyed it ( I love rhyme ) well done,
Andrew
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
Comment from words
I knew I would love this one from the title.
And, you did not disappoint.
This is filled with such joy, it brightened up my day.
Love the lilting rhyme.
Your work makes the best case for rhyme.
Hugs, your fan, d
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
I knew I would love this one from the title.
And, you did not disappoint.
This is filled with such joy, it brightened up my day.
Love the lilting rhyme.
Your work makes the best case for rhyme.
Hugs, your fan, d
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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I won't bother you with my sad tales of how long it take to come up with a third stanza. LOL If I brightened your day, it was worth every single hair I pulled out. Thank you, Diane :-) Brooke
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Through the years I have known you I have shared my poor husband's escapes with the deer and his peach trees and the gardening. Well, now he's decided he doesn't have enough ladybugs. He had me order 1800 ladybugs. He's talking about praying mantises, too. I'm sorry, but I draw a line a bumble bees. I know plants needs them but, I'm highly allergic to them. Loved your poem, it caused another rant.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
Through the years I have known you I have shared my poor husband's escapes with the deer and his peach trees and the gardening. Well, now he's decided he doesn't have enough ladybugs. He had me order 1800 ladybugs. He's talking about praying mantises, too. I'm sorry, but I draw a line a bumble bees. I know plants needs them but, I'm highly allergic to them. Loved your poem, it caused another rant.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Yeah, ordering bees seems a bit drastic, but I love the imported lady bugs, ready to eat their weight in aphids. LOL Thanks so much, Barbara :-)
Comment from Deborah Marie
Another beautiful poem with a virtual "six" here. Just love the way your wrote this from beginning to end. Nice progression, rhythm and flow. Stunning photo too. God Bless, Deb
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
Another beautiful poem with a virtual "six" here. Just love the way your wrote this from beginning to end. Nice progression, rhythm and flow. Stunning photo too. God Bless, Deb
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Deb, thank you so much :-) Brooke