Pohutukawas
Revived Post98 total reviews
Comment from janalma
Never heard of this tree, so very much enjoyed the botany lesson. Which was well said in your sonnet. Gave all the details about habitat and toughness. Musically. Very nice.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
Never heard of this tree, so very much enjoyed the botany lesson. Which was well said in your sonnet. Gave all the details about habitat and toughness. Musically. Very nice.
Comment Written 15-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thank you!
Steve
Comment from krys123
Truly this poem is very powerful along with its beauty and exceptional smooth and delicate way explaining the glamour and gorgeous outcroppings that surround the New Zealand coastline. This sonnet is truly written so beautifully in the rhyming is neither forced, labored or strained by the river flows smoothly throughout the poem. Thank you for sharing your posting this work for everyone and may you always find peace wherever you go.
Alex
PS: Good luck in the contest this is a righteous entry.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
Truly this poem is very powerful along with its beauty and exceptional smooth and delicate way explaining the glamour and gorgeous outcroppings that surround the New Zealand coastline. This sonnet is truly written so beautifully in the rhyming is neither forced, labored or strained by the river flows smoothly throughout the poem. Thank you for sharing your posting this work for everyone and may you always find peace wherever you go.
Alex
PS: Good luck in the contest this is a righteous entry.
Comment Written 15-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Alex, thanks for the kind words.
Steve
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Steve, you are so entirely welcome.
Alex
Comment from Gladness
Thank you, I learned something new :)I will have to share this with a New Zealander at work. I am still not sure I can pronounce it, but the picture helps a good deal to show me what its like. It's so strange for me to think of December as summertime.
Well done poem and notes,
Anita
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
Thank you, I learned something new :)I will have to share this with a New Zealander at work. I am still not sure I can pronounce it, but the picture helps a good deal to show me what its like. It's so strange for me to think of December as summertime.
Well done poem and notes,
Anita
Comment Written 15-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Anita.
Yes, we kiwis get around. We're trying to conquer the world by stealth, infiltrating everywhere.
Steve
Comment from mfowler
Your author notes are very helpful here. Your sonnet form and meter are perfect. The topic is singular in its interest and this allows your focus to stay fully on this interesting and lovely plant. Your opening stanza speaks of its tortured limbs standing as sentinel by the bay. It's a lovely clear image of its environment. You go on to describe the harsh nature of its soil and its ability to find a home among rocky outcrops. I like that line "salute December covered in scarlet cloth"... A great image to cap a very enjoyable poem.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
Your author notes are very helpful here. Your sonnet form and meter are perfect. The topic is singular in its interest and this allows your focus to stay fully on this interesting and lovely plant. Your opening stanza speaks of its tortured limbs standing as sentinel by the bay. It's a lovely clear image of its environment. You go on to describe the harsh nature of its soil and its ability to find a home among rocky outcrops. I like that line "salute December covered in scarlet cloth"... A great image to cap a very enjoyable poem.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thanks for the thoughtful review.
Steve
Comment from SLHarper
As always, Steve, this is an incredible write! I can list all the great technical things, rhyme, meter, all perfect, blah, blah,, ... But, really, you know all this, so I'll just tell you what touched me: Your very last line, "they ask for naught -- and offer beauty back." What a concept!!? What were you thinking? Lol ;)! To be wonderful and to brighten others' lives without expectation of reward or acknowledgement? If even a measurable fraction of people in the world were this way, the WHOLE world would be different. "Beauty is truth; truth beauty/ That is all ye know on earth and all ye need to know..." But why is it so hard for this concept to hit home?
Anyway, thank you. Fabulous. You will make my pizza sonnet sound to the committee like so much cheese on bread, and you will likely win with this entry, too! I shoulda just been a critic... Yours, Steph!
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
As always, Steve, this is an incredible write! I can list all the great technical things, rhyme, meter, all perfect, blah, blah,, ... But, really, you know all this, so I'll just tell you what touched me: Your very last line, "they ask for naught -- and offer beauty back." What a concept!!? What were you thinking? Lol ;)! To be wonderful and to brighten others' lives without expectation of reward or acknowledgement? If even a measurable fraction of people in the world were this way, the WHOLE world would be different. "Beauty is truth; truth beauty/ That is all ye know on earth and all ye need to know..." But why is it so hard for this concept to hit home?
Anyway, thank you. Fabulous. You will make my pizza sonnet sound to the committee like so much cheese on bread, and you will likely win with this entry, too! I shoulda just been a critic... Yours, Steph!
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thanks again, Steph, although you're not quite on the mark this time - third place only.
Yeah, I was kinda hoping that last line might give it enough zing to pull it through.
Steve
Comment from GracieAnn
kiwisteveh, this Sonnet Poetry Contest entry has the perfect meter and rhyme. The personifications are strong and show a brand of selflessness and tenacity. Well done. :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
kiwisteveh, this Sonnet Poetry Contest entry has the perfect meter and rhyme. The personifications are strong and show a brand of selflessness and tenacity. Well done. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thanks for the warm review.
Steve
Comment from DonandVicki
Without close inspection, the tree or bush resembles our bottle brush tree. Never the less your verse is well composed and has excellent rhyming structure. Don
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
Without close inspection, the tree or bush resembles our bottle brush tree. Never the less your verse is well composed and has excellent rhyming structure. Don
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Don.
Yes the two are both members of the myrtle family (myrtaceae) Pohutukawa flowers are less brush-like and their leaves are bigger as are their trunks, but the general leaf-colour and flower type and colour are the same.
Steve
Comment from adewpearl
solid rhyming in excellent English sonnet form
great use of consistent iambic meter coupled with good enjambment to keep the flow going
lovely alliteration in many lines of vivid descriptive detail
effective imagery of the trees as unyielding sentries
great assonance as well as alliteration in mine the miser
effective use of personification throughout
good consonance in cling to rocky
powerful turn in the third quatrain
a beautiful poem with a thoughtful message, all in excellent sonnet form - too late in the week for a six
Brooke
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
solid rhyming in excellent English sonnet form
great use of consistent iambic meter coupled with good enjambment to keep the flow going
lovely alliteration in many lines of vivid descriptive detail
effective imagery of the trees as unyielding sentries
great assonance as well as alliteration in mine the miser
effective use of personification throughout
good consonance in cling to rocky
powerful turn in the third quatrain
a beautiful poem with a thoughtful message, all in excellent sonnet form - too late in the week for a six
Brooke
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Brooke.
I like to post close to the deadline which often seems to be end of the week, hence the cookie jar is often empty by the time I get there....
Thanks for the thorough review,
Steve
Comment from Dawn Munro
What a beautiful sonnet, Steve, and a wonderful choice of topic - you've taught me something precious about New Zealand, and in such a favored and gorgeous way!
Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
What a beautiful sonnet, Steve, and a wonderful choice of topic - you've taught me something precious about New Zealand, and in such a favored and gorgeous way!
Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Dawn
I sometimes feel guilty that I don't write more about my own country.
Steve
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
This is a lovely poem, Steve... a real tribute to the pohutukawa. I've heard of the 'New Zealand Christmas tree,' so this was an interesting history lesson for me, or should I say geography... horticultural? most enjoyable, anyway. Giddy
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
This is a lovely poem, Steve... a real tribute to the pohutukawa. I've heard of the 'New Zealand Christmas tree,' so this was an interesting history lesson for me, or should I say geography... horticultural? most enjoyable, anyway. Giddy
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Giddy.
Steve