Writing Prompt Entries 2014
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Loved"The clue is in the title!
13 total reviews
Comment from paulah60
A truly fabulous little piece with few words that speak volumes! You've conveyed so much in seven little lines and not only let your triple trouble tumble into your bed with hubby, but let US into your bedroom! LOL Great use of alliteration (and this is not forced as I sometimes sense when alliteration is used for effect. This just flowed so naturally). Sixworthy, but I have none.
Though it surely deserves a win in the contest. You certainly have my vote.
Nice work Debra!
Cheers
Paula
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
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A truly fabulous little piece with few words that speak volumes! You've conveyed so much in seven little lines and not only let your triple trouble tumble into your bed with hubby, but let US into your bedroom! LOL Great use of alliteration (and this is not forced as I sometimes sense when alliteration is used for effect. This just flowed so naturally). Sixworthy, but I have none.
Though it surely deserves a win in the contest. You certainly have my vote.
Nice work Debra!
Cheers
Paula
Comment Written 27-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
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Hi Paula :) Thank you for your great feedback :) Our bed isn't sacred any more so I may as well invite you all in! Thanks for your encouragement, I appreciate it :) Cheers, Debra
Comment from mauial
Good job.I like the alliteration of :sated skin, day dawns,flickers into focus, Voices vying,triple trouble tumble and serenity scuppers.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
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Good job.I like the alliteration of :sated skin, day dawns,flickers into focus, Voices vying,triple trouble tumble and serenity scuppers.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
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Thank you mauial for your great feedback :) Kindest regards, Debra
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the picture. I love the poem. I love the author notes. Romantic nights are great. Then there is the dawn of a new day. The results of your romantic nights wake you up.They demand breakfast and they control the whole day. Great work. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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I love the picture. I love the poem. I love the author notes. Romantic nights are great. Then there is the dawn of a new day. The results of your romantic nights wake you up.They demand breakfast and they control the whole day. Great work. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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Hi nelliesellie :) You got it all summed up! Thank you for your great feedback and good luck wishes - I appreciate both! Kindest regards :) ...
Comment from l.raven
very well written and so very true...I being a mother can tell you it isn't always easy...but well worth it...for you are loved unconditionally...and that is a reward in it self...a great write...well said
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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very well written and so very true...I being a mother can tell you it isn't always easy...but well worth it...for you are loved unconditionally...and that is a reward in it self...a great write...well said
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Thank you for your lovely feedback :) I'm so happy you enjoyed my short free verse... kindest regards :)
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you are so very welcome...xxoo
Comment from BeasPeas
Wonderfully written, along with your author's note which is reward in itself. Your first three lines are gems:
"As kisses cool on sated skin
and a new day dawns,
the world flickers into focus."
Flickers into focus--great wording.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Wonderfully written, along with your author's note which is reward in itself. Your first three lines are gems:
"As kisses cool on sated skin
and a new day dawns,
the world flickers into focus."
Flickers into focus--great wording.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Hello BeasPeas :) Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback, I really appreciate your encouraging comments :) Kindest regards...
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
I am loved...
short and sweet, but your words say it all...
I am love -- isn't that what life is all about --
to be loved and welcome each day as a gift, to
be lived to the full
Good luck with the contest.
Margaret
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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I am loved...
short and sweet, but your words say it all...
I am love -- isn't that what life is all about --
to be loved and welcome each day as a gift, to
be lived to the full
Good luck with the contest.
Margaret
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Thank you Margaret for your wonderful feedback and good luck wishes. I appreciate both and your comments are just lovely :) Kindest regards...
Comment from TAB_that's me
This is a great free verse poem for the writing prompt. It has a nice flow to it. Good luck to you in the contest:)
~teresa~
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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This is a great free verse poem for the writing prompt. It has a nice flow to it. Good luck to you in the contest:)
~teresa~
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Hi Teresa :) Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback and good luck wishes. I appreciate both! Kindest regards ... :)
Comment from harmony13
Excellent poem! The poem flows and connects well. The author's words are clear, creative and thought provoking.
The artwork is perfect and compliments the poem.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Excellent poem! The poem flows and connects well. The author's words are clear, creative and thought provoking.
The artwork is perfect and compliments the poem.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Thank you harmony13 for your lovely feedback, I appreciate it. :) kindest regards...
Comment from adewpearl
great alliteration in kisses cool and sated skin and day dawns and flickers into focus
and in several more lines :-)
trouble tumble - excellent assonance
I love the characterization of your delightful children as triple trouble :-)
great detail with strong sensory appeal
you capture beautifully the chaos and LOVE of being a mom :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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great alliteration in kisses cool and sated skin and day dawns and flickers into focus
and in several more lines :-)
trouble tumble - excellent assonance
I love the characterization of your delightful children as triple trouble :-)
great detail with strong sensory appeal
you capture beautifully the chaos and LOVE of being a mom :-) Brooke
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Hi Brooke, thank you for your wonderful feedback, I appreciate your breakdown of what works well. A really lovely review! Thanks again, Debra :)
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
Iindeed you are loved - and it is one of God's most precious gifts.
Thoughtful and it has a very personal focus which you portray well with your chosen words.
Nicely formatted and told.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Iindeed you are loved - and it is one of God's most precious gifts.
Thoughtful and it has a very personal focus which you portray well with your chosen words.
Nicely formatted and told.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Thank you so much for your lovely feedback :) I appreciate it! Kindest regards...
