I've Seen Those Days
quatrains in abab rhyme165 total reviews
Comment from GWinterwin
Another great one by you Brooke. Your word flow is good and rhyming is great. The story is quite true, while winds of the sea can be very cruel and mean, the warming of the sun can be something to look forward to.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
Another great one by you Brooke. Your word flow is good and rhyming is great. The story is quite true, while winds of the sea can be very cruel and mean, the warming of the sun can be something to look forward to.
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
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GWinterwin, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
Brooke, this is so perfect.
A stunning presentation and such well written quatrains which flow so freely just like the tides of which you write.
The poetry seems so effortless and natural which means it is a pleasure to read.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
Brooke, this is so perfect.
A stunning presentation and such well written quatrains which flow so freely just like the tides of which you write.
The poetry seems so effortless and natural which means it is a pleasure to read.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
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Seken, thank you so very much for your graciousness and generosity :-) Brooke
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You are very welcome.
Comment from Alanna Renee
This is beautiful, Brooke! I especially liked the phrases "drowned the shores in sorrow" , "the wars the sea has raged", "as sands were disappearing" and the rhyming of "receded/unimpeded". I also liked the rhythm and flow of this piece with its 8/7 count. Thank you for sharing this! --Alanna :)
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
This is beautiful, Brooke! I especially liked the phrases "drowned the shores in sorrow" , "the wars the sea has raged", "as sands were disappearing" and the rhyming of "receded/unimpeded". I also liked the rhythm and flow of this piece with its 8/7 count. Thank you for sharing this! --Alanna :)
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
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Alanna, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from emrpoems
Solid ABAB rhymes
Good use of descriptive language creating vivid imagery
Soothing rhythm and easy flow of words from line to line
Alliteration throughout.
I've felt the pounding on the shore
as sands were disappearing
and heard the sounding of the roar
as if the end were nearing. Loved this verse
What a surprise! There is no Sawyer
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
Solid ABAB rhymes
Good use of descriptive language creating vivid imagery
Soothing rhythm and easy flow of words from line to line
Alliteration throughout.
I've felt the pounding on the shore
as sands were disappearing
and heard the sounding of the roar
as if the end were nearing. Loved this verse
What a surprise! There is no Sawyer
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
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emrpoems, thank you so very much. Sawyer joined a union and demanded Sunday off ;-) Brooke
Comment from nomi338
Ah yes, after each storm there is always the time for recovery. Only one with a gift of years is wise enough to know this. The young veiw each storm as the ultimate and fear the end is here, but the older and more experienced know that there will always be a calming after the storm. Thank you for the beautiful reminder.
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
Ah yes, after each storm there is always the time for recovery. Only one with a gift of years is wise enough to know this. The young veiw each storm as the ultimate and fear the end is here, but the older and more experienced know that there will always be a calming after the storm. Thank you for the beautiful reminder.
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
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nomi, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from J. P. Egry
Seems like this one is a sure winner for the contest, but then, we never know for sure, do we? The beauty of the message as the sea being a metaphor for life is so enhanced by the flowing rhythm of the lines ebbing and flowing themselves, that one can almost detect the sound of the surf in the words. Unforced rhyming adds to the mood and the artwork, though not necessary for the value of the poem, is a lovely complement.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
Seems like this one is a sure winner for the contest, but then, we never know for sure, do we? The beauty of the message as the sea being a metaphor for life is so enhanced by the flowing rhythm of the lines ebbing and flowing themselves, that one can almost detect the sound of the surf in the words. Unforced rhyming adds to the mood and the artwork, though not necessary for the value of the poem, is a lovely complement.
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2014
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J.P, thank you so very much for your encouraging and generous response to this poem. :-) Brooke
Comment from paulah60
This wonderful piece articulates and exposes what was already implicit in all your writing: that you embrace sunshine AND storms (you can't write the way you do, with depth, if you don't). Nature is the perfect metaphor to convey this (and to convey everything, really), as it's not just outside of us. It reflects what's within.
Lovely work, Brooke.
Cheers
Paula
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
This wonderful piece articulates and exposes what was already implicit in all your writing: that you embrace sunshine AND storms (you can't write the way you do, with depth, if you don't). Nature is the perfect metaphor to convey this (and to convey everything, really), as it's not just outside of us. It reflects what's within.
Lovely work, Brooke.
Cheers
Paula
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
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Paula, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hi Brooke like how your describe with your poetic talent how the moods of folks go up and down
Good ex in you poem when you said-
I have also known the days
when raging waves receded
as sun shone down its loving gaze
and life was unimpeded.
Gert
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
Hi Brooke like how your describe with your poetic talent how the moods of folks go up and down
Good ex in you poem when you said-
I have also known the days
when raging waves receded
as sun shone down its loving gaze
and life was unimpeded.
Gert
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
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Gert, thank you so much, my friend :-) Brooke
Comment from manicblue
Nicely written. It's always a relief when the storms cease and the sun shines again. I just wrote another attempt at haiku about this very thing. lol
I liked the meter in this, a nice soothing rhyme as well. I wish you good luck in this contest.
Lucretia xoxo
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
Nicely written. It's always a relief when the storms cease and the sun shines again. I just wrote another attempt at haiku about this very thing. lol
I liked the meter in this, a nice soothing rhyme as well. I wish you good luck in this contest.
Lucretia xoxo
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
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Lucretia, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from the blue pixel
You know I am an alliteration lover and you never over-do it and just your choice of words, "raging waves receded" and "the wars the sea has waged" - (a beautiful line to read out loud with two words separating an alliteration) roll off the tongue deliciously. Of course I enjoyed your poem with its optimistic ending but first it is delivered in the back to front, "sun to storming. This review is no doubt clear as mud but I think you know me well enough to know I am trying to express my admiration and now for a small favour. Please help me to understand something Brooke for I have been accused lately, incorrectly I believe of using a double negative but my confidence always gets shaken and this is why I noticed your line "as if the end WERE nearing". I would have "the thought "the end" was singular (maybe it can be both) but I am now unashamedly calling upon the time of my favourite English teacher to set me straight - only if you have the time. In any event, superbly written as always. xx Carol
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
You know I am an alliteration lover and you never over-do it and just your choice of words, "raging waves receded" and "the wars the sea has waged" - (a beautiful line to read out loud with two words separating an alliteration) roll off the tongue deliciously. Of course I enjoyed your poem with its optimistic ending but first it is delivered in the back to front, "sun to storming. This review is no doubt clear as mud but I think you know me well enough to know I am trying to express my admiration and now for a small favour. Please help me to understand something Brooke for I have been accused lately, incorrectly I believe of using a double negative but my confidence always gets shaken and this is why I noticed your line "as if the end WERE nearing". I would have "the thought "the end" was singular (maybe it can be both) but I am now unashamedly calling upon the time of my favourite English teacher to set me straight - only if you have the time. In any event, superbly written as always. xx Carol
Comment Written 23-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2014
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As if the end were nearing - this is use of the subjunctive, which is used when something is not actually occurring but is only "as if" - For instance, we say - If I were rich, I would buy...
If he were President, I'm sure he'd support programs for the poor
Hope that helps :-) Thank you for your thoughtful review, Carol :-) Brooke
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Oh yes. NOW I remember. "As if" I didn't really know that, somewhere, deep down. Would you believe I am a former (very former) English Honour student? lol You helped. You have always explained things to me so well and you will be proud to know that I always make sure my dad and Dad are correctly written - uppercase if I could use his name, that's what you said to me and I have never forgotten. Thanks for this Brooke
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:-)
If you were any nicer, I would be left speechless ;-)
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I have a fan of "one" lol Thank dear friend.