Steve's Story-Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 38 "Philosophy Jones"A collection of my poems
63 total reviews
Comment from madhatter1977
This is very good indeed, Kiwisteveh and I am glad you have such faith in your own righteous beliefs in God and Heaven!!! I actually feel sorry for 'Philosophy' as you call him. Is that as offensive as WASP? Just a thought to pierce the nightly gloom. Pete
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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This is very good indeed, Kiwisteveh and I am glad you have such faith in your own righteous beliefs in God and Heaven!!! I actually feel sorry for 'Philosophy' as you call him. Is that as offensive as WASP? Just a thought to pierce the nightly gloom. Pete
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Pete.
Steve
Comment from Gladness
So nice of you to give credit to O.Henry. You have done the story well. The rhymes and everything work the story through to perfection. It caught my attention and kept it all the way through. Well done!
Anita
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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So nice of you to give credit to O.Henry. You have done the story well. The rhymes and everything work the story through to perfection. It caught my attention and kept it all the way through. Well done!
Anita
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Anita
Steve
Comment from J. P. Egry
This is a wonderfully fun story in a song and it rides along merrily on its great meter and rhyme. The setup on the page works very well for ease in reading with the long/short alternating lines and spacing of stanzas. Lots of specific detail provide a vivid picture in the reader's mind of PJ's journey, almost like a reel of film. Thanks for sharing this humorous tale.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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This is a wonderfully fun story in a song and it rides along merrily on its great meter and rhyme. The setup on the page works very well for ease in reading with the long/short alternating lines and spacing of stanzas. Lots of specific detail provide a vivid picture in the reader's mind of PJ's journey, almost like a reel of film. Thanks for sharing this humorous tale.
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thank you for the kind words.
Have a great day.
Steve
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You're welcome.
Comment from DonandVicki
Clever re-write to the O. Henry plot and maybe a little better than his. Nice rhythm and flow to your work with enough rhyme to make it sing. Don
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Clever re-write to the O. Henry plot and maybe a little better than his. Nice rhythm and flow to your work with enough rhyme to make it sing. Don
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thank you, Don
Have a great day.
Steve
Comment from kiwijenny
It is also reminiscent of Otis the town drunk who angled for arrest to get over his drinking in a nice cell and to get away from his wife...
Philosophy Jones is well written
God bless
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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It is also reminiscent of Otis the town drunk who angled for arrest to get over his drinking in a nice cell and to get away from his wife...
Philosophy Jones is well written
God bless
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thanks, jenny.
Have a great day.
Steve
Comment from DALLAS01
This was a delight to read. The story was so tightly written; weaving rhyme, rhythm, and alliteration so deftly that I actually got lost in it. It is a classic on its own. Sorry I do not have a six left.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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This was a delight to read. The story was so tightly written; weaving rhyme, rhythm, and alliteration so deftly that I actually got lost in it. It is a classic on its own. Sorry I do not have a six left.
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thanks for the kind words and the virtual six.
Steve
Comment from RGstar
A little bit long Steve, but beautifully presented, both in thought and deed. I would like to call this an abab structure as the rhymes compliment recurrence within.
A beautiful story, rather like a song of old, rich and telling.
Great image which gives the imprint of a readable blueprint.
I like this.
Good luck in the competition.
Best wishes,
RG
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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A little bit long Steve, but beautifully presented, both in thought and deed. I would like to call this an abab structure as the rhymes compliment recurrence within.
A beautiful story, rather like a song of old, rich and telling.
Great image which gives the imprint of a readable blueprint.
I like this.
Good luck in the competition.
Best wishes,
RG
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thanks, RG
It's a little difficult to tell a 'real' story in shorter form than this.
Steve
Comment from nancyjam
You tell such a great story here with
excellent dialogue and visual images.
Nice alliteration of "frigid fingers" and "th" in 5th stanza.
Excellent rhyme and meter to carry it along.
Best of luck in the contest. Nancy
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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You tell such a great story here with
excellent dialogue and visual images.
Nice alliteration of "frigid fingers" and "th" in 5th stanza.
Excellent rhyme and meter to carry it along.
Best of luck in the contest. Nancy
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Nancy - glad you enjoyed the story.
Steve
Comment from Just2Write
Nice twists and tangles in this poetic story of Philosophy Jones (cool name by the way)
Seems he did, then didn't, then did get his way; that is of course depending on which way he was going to be going.
Nice timing of the words and layout of the plot. Great character building with Philosophy(He was not averse to lifting a purse) and with the lady whose purse was lifted.
Good plot building, and a really thought-provoking climax and close.
Rose.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Nice twists and tangles in this poetic story of Philosophy Jones (cool name by the way)
Seems he did, then didn't, then did get his way; that is of course depending on which way he was going to be going.
Nice timing of the words and layout of the plot. Great character building with Philosophy(He was not averse to lifting a purse) and with the lady whose purse was lifted.
Good plot building, and a really thought-provoking climax and close.
Rose.
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Rose, thanks so much for the great review.
Steve
Comment from Cumbrianlass
Well, I love it. I was reminded of Les Mis, A Christmas Carol, and an alcoholic homeless man I knew back in the UK, called Frankie. Every Christmas, they'd arrest him for vagrancy. The cops kept him in over the holidays and made sure he had a Christmas dinner before they let him out again.
The rhyming and the way you tell this is really excellent. Saturday night = no sixes left...otherwise!!!
I think you'll do very well in the contest with this. I hope so.
Av
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Well, I love it. I was reminded of Les Mis, A Christmas Carol, and an alcoholic homeless man I knew back in the UK, called Frankie. Every Christmas, they'd arrest him for vagrancy. The cops kept him in over the holidays and made sure he had a Christmas dinner before they let him out again.
The rhyming and the way you tell this is really excellent. Saturday night = no sixes left...otherwise!!!
I think you'll do very well in the contest with this. I hope so.
Av
Comment Written 22-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Av.
Are you not based in the UK any more? I guess I just assumed from the site name....
Do you know O. Henry? he has some really great yarns.
Steve
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No - I've lived in Canada since '87. I Googled O Henry. He was born in Greensboro' North Carolina! I have driven thru there so many times. I shall investigate him further, thanks to you. :)
