A Continental Breakfast
flash fiction 100-150 word story27 total reviews
Comment from nordicgirl
This is an excellent answer to the prompt. A complete, interesting and clever tale in less than 150 words. Has my vote. Great job. NG
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
  |
This is an excellent answer to the prompt. A complete, interesting and clever tale in less than 150 words. Has my vote. Great job. NG
Comment Written 09-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
-
Thank you so much. Very encouraging. I'll cross my fingers.
Comment from BeasPeas
A good read, exciting, diabolical. Maybe he'll be successful in pulling off the perfect crime. Good sequencing and insight into his thought process.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
 |
A good read, exciting, diabolical. Maybe he'll be successful in pulling off the perfect crime. Good sequencing and insight into his thought process.
Comment Written 09-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
-
What a great review. So very encouraging. I am smiling ear to ear. If I don't win, this will be my prize!! Thank you so much!
Comment from Michaelk
Excellent story. Great twist. You managed to get a novel's worth of action into less than150 words. Amazing! Calling his wife's phone was a nice touch. I look forward to reading more of your work. Good job. I hope you win the contest.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
|
Excellent story. Great twist. You managed to get a novel's worth of action into less than150 words. Amazing! Calling his wife's phone was a nice touch. I look forward to reading more of your work. Good job. I hope you win the contest.
Comment Written 09-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
-
Thank you so much! I hope so too, but this review will be reward enough!!
Comment from joann r romei
Well not until they catch him, what a crumb killing the wife, this was a good read, no errors noted, good luck in the contest,
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
|
Well not until they catch him, what a crumb killing the wife, this was a good read, no errors noted, good luck in the contest,
Comment Written 09-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
-
Thank you. I'll cross my fingers. I may need the extra cash in jail!
Comment from kiwisteveh
All go isn't it! Hope you didn't leave a footprint on the door you kicked in.... or that your murderous accomplice doesn't rat you out.... or that your girlfriend hasn't vanished with your money and some Mexican drug lord.... or....
Good luck in the contest
Steve
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
|
All go isn't it! Hope you didn't leave a footprint on the door you kicked in.... or that your murderous accomplice doesn't rat you out.... or that your girlfriend hasn't vanished with your money and some Mexican drug lord.... or....
Good luck in the contest
Steve
Comment Written 09-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
-
Rats! I'm not going to make it am I? I knew I needed fifty more words! Appreciate the well wishes. It appears I may need the money. Thank you very much.
Comment from Dom G Robles
This is a prompt story where the requirement is to use some words for the entry. I noted the words listed were used, but I am not quite satisfied on the contents of the story. It is abrupt to come to the conclusive part of the events
surrounding the case. Of course with the limited words of
100 to 150, detailed explanation is not quite possible. Yet, it can be revised to make the story run better.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
|
This is a prompt story where the requirement is to use some words for the entry. I noted the words listed were used, but I am not quite satisfied on the contents of the story. It is abrupt to come to the conclusive part of the events
surrounding the case. Of course with the limited words of
100 to 150, detailed explanation is not quite possible. Yet, it can be revised to make the story run better.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 09-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
-
Could be some revisions, I agree. I was going for a kind of pop, pop, pop, effect. But, I will give your advice some serious consideration. Thank you for some great insights and a thoughtful review. Most appreciated.
Comment from emrpoems
All the words as required have been used---
breakfast, light, rock, phone, clock.
loved the idea of a continental breakfast.
Good plot but do not try it in real life you might not be so lucky
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
|
All the words as required have been used---
breakfast, light, rock, phone, clock.
loved the idea of a continental breakfast.
Good plot but do not try it in real life you might not be so lucky
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 09-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2014
-
Darn! I knew I'd have to move from Mazatlan. Russian airport, here I come! Thanks for the encouraging words. In the real world I'm lucky my wife tolerates me and my Fanstory addiction. Hahaha. Thank you.
