Unravelled
Ummmm... it's a metaphor I think76 total reviews
Comment from amahra
Great art work choice for this writing. Loved the very simple wording of the poem. And loved that the word Capitalization didn't appear in the poem, but yet through great word choice 'it was surely there'.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
Great art work choice for this writing. Loved the very simple wording of the poem. And loved that the word Capitalization didn't appear in the poem, but yet through great word choice 'it was surely there'.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you!
Steve
Comment from Tina McKala
wow, this was very dynamic and profound. to live to its fullest while there is time, but what is time? and in the end we turn back to ash, sin or no sin, sinister or the saint. this was a great write!!
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
wow, this was very dynamic and profound. to live to its fullest while there is time, but what is time? and in the end we turn back to ash, sin or no sin, sinister or the saint. this was a great write!!
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Tina, for the great review and the six stars - perhaps you have understood this more than most....
Steve
Comment from royowen
A very philosophically rich poem, very thought provoking, laced with beautiful metaphorical imagery, and seasoned with descriptive irony! It flows with a lyrical quality, with rhyme and meter consistent and tight! Well done. Cheers, Roy.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
A very philosophically rich poem, very thought provoking, laced with beautiful metaphorical imagery, and seasoned with descriptive irony! It flows with a lyrical quality, with rhyme and meter consistent and tight! Well done. Cheers, Roy.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Roy - I have never been called a philosopher before. Do you have to be able to understand what you have written to qualify?
Steve
Comment from rhymelord
Dear Steve,
Goddam it. Looks to me like another winner. Metre, rhyme and great metaphor for the way life goes, as in "Shit happens and then you die"
Regards
Reg
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
Dear Steve,
Goddam it. Looks to me like another winner. Metre, rhyme and great metaphor for the way life goes, as in "Shit happens and then you die"
Regards
Reg
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Reg, but I wouldn't rush to bet on this one winning. It is a bit different which is partly what I aimed for, and from the reviews it clearly says different things to different people, so maybe that's good...
And what if the judges are more of the 'shit happens and then you are born again' variety?
Steve
Comment from TOMORAL
Time certainly has a way of unraveling that's for sure. I found this most compelling and interesting to read. Well written. Love is a great leveler!
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
Time certainly has a way of unraveling that's for sure. I found this most compelling and interesting to read. Well written. Love is a great leveler!
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you!
Steve
Comment from Bibble Immelman
Really interesting and well rhymed piece, I guess it could be a metaphor for life's journey as you aptly put it "from cradle to pall". Really a nice piece here :)
MK
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reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
Really interesting and well rhymed piece, I guess it could be a metaphor for life's journey as you aptly put it "from cradle to pall". Really a nice piece here :)
MK
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Bibble Tsk Tsk Immelman
Makes about as much sense to me as your name game poem, but it's been fun reading what other people think it's about!
Steve
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Haha, that's true Steve; reading other people's ideas on what your poem means is always interesting. Sometimes it is completely different from what your poem means to you, and that's really special, when you can make someone feel something with just a stein of words :)
MK
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
You sure have a way with words, Steve. This one could be quite famous because it is a kind of proverb. I like the way you cleverly rhymed the lines. Giddy
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
You sure have a way with words, Steve. This one could be quite famous because it is a kind of proverb. I like the way you cleverly rhymed the lines. Giddy
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Giddy.
And like all good proverbs, it takes a bit of head-scratching to work out exactly what it means.... if I ever find out, I'll let you know!
Steve
Comment from Jackarrie
A very interesting abc poem, it has great sentiments in the meaning of the metaphor, a very clever write.
well done and good luck in the contest. Mary
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
A very interesting abc poem, it has great sentiments in the meaning of the metaphor, a very clever write.
well done and good luck in the contest. Mary
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thanks, Mary!
Steve
Comment from Petriesan
good luck in the contest
I love this: Question the Maker and fight for the Ball
we all ought to question everything, use the miind and inquisitiveness with which God instilled us
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
good luck in the contest
I love this: Question the Maker and fight for the Ball
we all ought to question everything, use the miind and inquisitiveness with which God instilled us
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thanks for the review and good wishes.
Steve
Comment from mickbey
This poem is clever and creative, it has a unique sound and 'voice,' and I'd agree, I think it's a metaphor too, it's witty and philosophical, it goes deep but still has a light touch to it, an enjoyable read.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
This poem is clever and creative, it has a unique sound and 'voice,' and I'd agree, I think it's a metaphor too, it's witty and philosophical, it goes deep but still has a light touch to it, an enjoyable read.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you!
Steve