Nothing is a Substitute
rhyming quatrains in 8/6/8/6163 total reviews
Comment from rhymelord
Dear Brooke,
To whom is this addressed? From you to Sawyer or vice versa. I guess the former. This is real Nana stuff and perfect to boot. LOL
Reg
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
  |
Dear Brooke,
To whom is this addressed? From you to Sawyer or vice versa. I guess the former. This is real Nana stuff and perfect to boot. LOL
Reg
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
-
Thank you so much, Reg - I intended it to be from me to him, though I would hope the poem could be from any person who loves another to that beloved person. The fact that I am inspired by photos of Sawyer does not mean I intend the poems to be limited to
him. Brooke
Comment from Liz Dunbee
What lovely words for someone you love. There is no substitute for being with a loved one, no matter how optimistic one is. 'When bubbles burst, I blow some more
to decorate the skies,
and if no hummingbirds come round,
I look for butterflies'- My favourite stanza.
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
 |
What lovely words for someone you love. There is no substitute for being with a loved one, no matter how optimistic one is. 'When bubbles burst, I blow some more
to decorate the skies,
and if no hummingbirds come round,
I look for butterflies'- My favourite stanza.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
-
Liz, thank you so very much for this generous and gracious review :-) Brooke
Comment from onkughosh19
A beautiful poem as always.THis poem begins very well "When ocean views are miles away/ a sandbox has to do''Infact I like each and every line , every word of this write....it is written so well.
THe photo is good and the title is great.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
|
A beautiful poem as always.THis poem begins very well "When ocean views are miles away/ a sandbox has to do''Infact I like each and every line , every word of this write....it is written so well.
THe photo is good and the title is great.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
-
onkughosh, thank you so very much :-) Brooke
Comment from marijmd
Ah this was another sweet one from you Brooke! It made me long for a spring day at the park and watching my boys play and run.
|
Ah this was another sweet one from you Brooke! It made me long for a spring day at the park and watching my boys play and run.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
Comment from Ben Colder
Another great write. It has a great meaning and innocently done in the atmosphere of wonder. You did it again Brooke. Blessings to you and the family.
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
|
Another great write. It has a great meaning and innocently done in the atmosphere of wonder. You did it again Brooke. Blessings to you and the family.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
-
Ben, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from mfowler
You've got the iambic tetrameter/trimeter rhythm working well in this to produce good rhythm as I read. The notion that as a positive thinker, the voice can always find a substitute to keep him/her happy, is infectious. But your conclusion says no one can substitute for you. Your child photo implies that this is the voice of the child, but as with a lot of your poems, it is easy to imagine virtually any relationship being at the centre of your poem's premise. Great suff.
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
|
You've got the iambic tetrameter/trimeter rhythm working well in this to produce good rhythm as I read. The notion that as a positive thinker, the voice can always find a substitute to keep him/her happy, is infectious. But your conclusion says no one can substitute for you. Your child photo implies that this is the voice of the child, but as with a lot of your poems, it is easy to imagine virtually any relationship being at the centre of your poem's premise. Great suff.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
-
mfowler, thanks so much :-) Brooke
Comment from hobopoet
A few things here:
1. Sawyer is a cool name for a kid. Just saying.
2. I love the British use of "round" in S3L3.
3. I really liked this poem. The meter is solid, the flow is absolutely fantastic, and there are tons of sensory input here (ocean views, drab clouds, breezes, burning embers, etc.).
Good stuff. I enjoyed this. :)
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2014
|
A few things here:
1. Sawyer is a cool name for a kid. Just saying.
2. I love the British use of "round" in S3L3.
3. I really liked this poem. The meter is solid, the flow is absolutely fantastic, and there are tons of sensory input here (ocean views, drab clouds, breezes, burning embers, etc.).
Good stuff. I enjoyed this. :)
Comment Written 26-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2014
-
hobopoet, thank you :-) Yes, he has a cool name, but then again, he was named by my cool kid. LOL Brooke
Comment from Dawn Munro
Oh you! How precious is this? About as sweet and precious as a poem can be. You know I have to spread the very few sixes I have around, Brooke, because I follow so my talented writers, but I can't let this one go, just can't!
As always it's so full of imagery, so perfect technically. You and a few others could have sixes on everything you write, you know that, don't you? LOL
Anyway, here it is.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
|
Oh you! How precious is this? About as sweet and precious as a poem can be. You know I have to spread the very few sixes I have around, Brooke, because I follow so my talented writers, but I can't let this one go, just can't!
As always it's so full of imagery, so perfect technically. You and a few others could have sixes on everything you write, you know that, don't you? LOL
Anyway, here it is.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
-
Thank you so much, Dawn. I truly do appreciate your spending one of those sixes on me :-) Brooke
Comment from CR Delport
I am sure the Cute Little One has a fantastic imagination that can keep him busy for hours on end. This is very well written. Soon winter will come to us in the southern hemisphere, and I am not looking forward to it.
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
|
I am sure the Cute Little One has a fantastic imagination that can keep him busy for hours on end. This is very well written. Soon winter will come to us in the southern hemisphere, and I am not looking forward to it.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
-
CR, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Alanna Renee
Love this idea! The imagery is fantastic, and the idea of looking for something else to be happy about is an uplifting thought. I particularly liked the part about the hummingbirds and butterflies. :)
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
|
Love this idea! The imagery is fantastic, and the idea of looking for something else to be happy about is an uplifting thought. I particularly liked the part about the hummingbirds and butterflies. :)
Comment Written 26-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
-
Thank you, Alanna, for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
