I Contemplate
modified octogram206 total reviews
Comment from mfowler
You have set out to explore the imagination of possibility through the voice of a child. It's a clever concept and expertly rendered in your well structured verse. I fancy that travelling with hippos.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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You have set out to explore the imagination of possibility through the voice of a child. It's a clever concept and expertly rendered in your well structured verse. I fancy that travelling with hippos.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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mfowler, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Jendowoz
What a lovely short of Sawyer and a perfect poem to go with it. He looks so deep in thought or very sleepy LOL. The way you roll out those rhymes make every poem you write exciting to read.
Regards, Jen
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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What a lovely short of Sawyer and a perfect poem to go with it. He looks so deep in thought or very sleepy LOL. The way you roll out those rhymes make every poem you write exciting to read.
Regards, Jen
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Jen, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from map261354
A nice poem well organized! One can feel a baby's exact feelings about the present and the promising future, so pure and innocent.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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A nice poem well organized! One can feel a baby's exact feelings about the present and the promising future, so pure and innocent.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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map, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from onkughosh19
Let me first of all say that this photo of your grandson is great....he's looking adorable!
now coming back to you poem...it is beautiful as always. THe children as well as the adults are going to love this poem.
THe title is good and it really seems Tom is contemplating.
I enjoy reading your poems and always look forward to them.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Let me first of all say that this photo of your grandson is great....he's looking adorable!
now coming back to you poem...it is beautiful as always. THe children as well as the adults are going to love this poem.
THe title is good and it really seems Tom is contemplating.
I enjoy reading your poems and always look forward to them.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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onkughosh, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from tfawcus
Your rhythm and rhyme are consistent and form suits the subject well; the short 4-syllable lines and repetition underlining the central theme of the poem. There are indeed so many options open at that tender age; nothing seems impossible. Conversationally 'there's some' is fairly commonplace these days, though strictly speaking it should be 'there are some' rather than 'there is some'. However, in the context of first person narrative from the point of view of the child, what you have written sits quite well.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Your rhythm and rhyme are consistent and form suits the subject well; the short 4-syllable lines and repetition underlining the central theme of the poem. There are indeed so many options open at that tender age; nothing seems impossible. Conversationally 'there's some' is fairly commonplace these days, though strictly speaking it should be 'there are some' rather than 'there is some'. However, in the context of first person narrative from the point of view of the child, what you have written sits quite well.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Thank you, tfawcus. Yeah, I know about my bad grammar there, but I make allowances in my poetry that I would never make in prose :-) Brooke
Comment from RPSaxena
Hello Brooke,
It's a nice piece of Children Poetry beautifully depicting interesting'Contemplation'.
Wording is simple and perfectly matching the theme.
Smooth flow with nice rhyming scheme and lively imagery.
"The possibilities abound,
adventures that might roll around --
so many things beneath the sun
are yet to come."
Excellent!
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Hello Brooke,
It's a nice piece of Children Poetry beautifully depicting interesting'Contemplation'.
Wording is simple and perfectly matching the theme.
Smooth flow with nice rhyming scheme and lively imagery.
"The possibilities abound,
adventures that might roll around --
so many things beneath the sun
are yet to come."
Excellent!
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Thank you, RP, for your gracious review :-) Brooke
Comment from robina1978
An excellent photo, where he really seems to think. And then you wrote about it in one of your favourite forms. He thinks of all the things that are still to come.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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An excellent photo, where he really seems to think. And then you wrote about it in one of your favourite forms. He thinks of all the things that are still to come.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Ine, thank you so much. Brooke :-)
Comment from visionary1234
"are yet to come" - who'd have thought those words could be so magical, Brooke. It's my son's birthday tomorrow so your piece is very timely. He's 17 and yes, so much is 'yet to come'! :)S
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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"are yet to come" - who'd have thought those words could be so magical, Brooke. It's my son's birthday tomorrow so your piece is very timely. He's 17 and yes, so much is 'yet to come'! :)S
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Seventeen, boy, is that a different phase of a child's life :-) My son is now twice seventeen, but I still remember those years. Thanks so much, Sharyn. Brooke :-)
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Well my other son turns 40 this year Brooke!
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My oldest sister and I are 19 years apart - 23 years, I'm impressed! :-)
Comment from jadapenn
Beautiful. I wonder how many little ones ever stop to contemplate the things to come. If they do, then they surely can't remember. I think most of us only start to remember incidences at 3 or 4. It is exciting to await all these adventures, though. After all, they are new to the world. Well penned. luv jada
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Beautiful. I wonder how many little ones ever stop to contemplate the things to come. If they do, then they surely can't remember. I think most of us only start to remember incidences at 3 or 4. It is exciting to await all these adventures, though. After all, they are new to the world. Well penned. luv jada
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2014
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Thank you, Jada. Yeah, Sawyer has had so many cool experiences the past 20 months - sad he'll forget them all. :-) Brooke
Comment from Rondeno
You really hit it, Brooke. You capture that sense of wonder, the feeling of embarking on the great adventure. What a lucky little boy he is!
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2014
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You really hit it, Brooke. You capture that sense of wonder, the feeling of embarking on the great adventure. What a lucky little boy he is!
Comment Written 25-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2014
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Michael, thanks so much :-) Brooke
