Beyond the Sunrise
a dedication to Cj (notes)42 total reviews
Comment from L.A.Matthies
One of the better free verse poems I've read here. Being a less formal style, I'll use emotion as the gauge. There you have succeeded on spades!
This piece of work was written for yourself (a feeling I comprehend quite well), so do not be concerned with ratings or even suggestions. It is beautiful, a stunning tribute, just as it is ...be well!
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
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One of the better free verse poems I've read here. Being a less formal style, I'll use emotion as the gauge. There you have succeeded on spades!
This piece of work was written for yourself (a feeling I comprehend quite well), so do not be concerned with ratings or even suggestions. It is beautiful, a stunning tribute, just as it is ...be well!
Comment Written 22-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
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Hey thank you for that advice. I appreciate your words. I'm touched that you think its one of the better ones. I'm glad ultimately that I posted it as it keeps his memory alive for me. Thank you so much. Truly.
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
The feeling of pure helplesness on both one gone to want to bad to go and on the ones here to wonder why and try to see what thsy missed. Two stories of pain. One over and the other left to morm.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
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The feeling of pure helplesness on both one gone to want to bad to go and on the ones here to wonder why and try to see what thsy missed. Two stories of pain. One over and the other left to morm.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
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Thank you Barb, you got it. Its very tough to understand. I truly thank you for reading and for the great review. Thank you Barb. Really, thank you.
Comment from Merriweather
What a beautiful tribute to your friend -your lovely poem. It is well crafted with deep meaning and reverence, for life, for love, for friendship. The imagery in your poem is very moving. The last line I find very effective and compelling. "Father, Find my smile beneath the wind as I begin to begin my first everything again." Upon their wings I live eternal." A wonderful resolution to your story.
You poem definitely carries a lot of emotion in it that draws the reader in, and is a cause for much reflection. You are a true friend.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
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What a beautiful tribute to your friend -your lovely poem. It is well crafted with deep meaning and reverence, for life, for love, for friendship. The imagery in your poem is very moving. The last line I find very effective and compelling. "Father, Find my smile beneath the wind as I begin to begin my first everything again." Upon their wings I live eternal." A wonderful resolution to your story.
You poem definitely carries a lot of emotion in it that draws the reader in, and is a cause for much reflection. You are a true friend.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
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Thank you for saying that. It means a lot. The last part is the most important in my opinion. I'm glad you saw that too. Its a message for his parents. Thank you so much for reading this, its special to me.
Comment from Spitfire
Oh dear Greg. This is just a brilliant piece soaked in images of the past and the present. Fortunately, the narrator foresees the future of starting all over again. Effective repetition of the butterflies that will carry on. There's a reference to the pain of cancer - Was it too much for him? I can connect with that.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Oh dear Greg. This is just a brilliant piece soaked in images of the past and the present. Fortunately, the narrator foresees the future of starting all over again. Effective repetition of the butterflies that will carry on. There's a reference to the pain of cancer - Was it too much for him? I can connect with that.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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I'm so incredibly grateful. Thank you for such a kind review. His "cancer" was debilitating depression. It ate away at him. He fought hard though. I had a dream he was in Heaven. I really did. It makes me feel good. Thank you so much for reading this.
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Ah, my first thought was depression, but the notes threw me a curb. Spirits do send messages into our dimension--his way of thanking you for the poem.
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Thank you...
Comment from Keturah Martin
Thanks for having the courage to post this and for the notes you included. Judgment is a terrible thing and often that is where people jump as soon as they hear "suicide." You are quite right that no one knows another's battle or pain and therefore are in no position to judge. My abusers programmed me to end it all in suicide and it is a divine miracle that I am here today.
Your written words are very eloquently written from the heart perspective of your friend and portray a vivid picture rousing all my heart's compassion. God bless and keep writing.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Thanks for having the courage to post this and for the notes you included. Judgment is a terrible thing and often that is where people jump as soon as they hear "suicide." You are quite right that no one knows another's battle or pain and therefore are in no position to judge. My abusers programmed me to end it all in suicide and it is a divine miracle that I am here today.
Your written words are very eloquently written from the heart perspective of your friend and portray a vivid picture rousing all my heart's compassion. God bless and keep writing.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Thank you so very much for reading. Thank God you made it. People can be brutal. I hate it. I'm so grateful that you ook something away from this. Thank you.
Comment from hobopoet
Man, you had me from the first line. "The butterflies cried my name tonight." Are you kidding me? That's downright inspired, and very powerful.
You cranked this one right out of the park. Good job.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Man, you had me from the first line. "The butterflies cried my name tonight." Are you kidding me? That's downright inspired, and very powerful.
You cranked this one right out of the park. Good job.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Tank you so much! Truly.
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
Outstanding write, Gregory Cody! This should fare well in the contest. I was very relieved to read your author notes after reading the poem. At first I thought that it might be about yourself, and I was growing quite worried as I read it.
Exeptionally well written, graphic, impactful, and emotional. I loved it all. What particularly stood out for me was your stanza that begins with ... "the agony of lost direction". To me that spoke of someone who just couldn't take it any more, and it tugged at my heart-strings.
"No one knows a person's pain or their threshold for it" ... You are absolutely right! No one can judge another person. We do not know what they have to live with.
You are a very talented writer, GregoryCody. Your writes never disappoint!
Connie :)
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Outstanding write, Gregory Cody! This should fare well in the contest. I was very relieved to read your author notes after reading the poem. At first I thought that it might be about yourself, and I was growing quite worried as I read it.
Exeptionally well written, graphic, impactful, and emotional. I loved it all. What particularly stood out for me was your stanza that begins with ... "the agony of lost direction". To me that spoke of someone who just couldn't take it any more, and it tugged at my heart-strings.
"No one knows a person's pain or their threshold for it" ... You are absolutely right! No one can judge another person. We do not know what they have to live with.
You are a very talented writer, GregoryCody. Your writes never disappoint!
Connie :)
Comment Written 21-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Thank you! That's a very kind review. And thank you for such beautiful compliments. I'm so glad you took away that from the poem. Judgement, etc. his depression was too tough. It hurts my heart. I've dealt wth a horrible past year and I know I only made it through God and his help watching over me. I miss him. Thank you so much for reading this. It was special to me.
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It is so very difficult when one loses a friend, particularly when they are still young and their death is so unexpected. The passing of time does help though to soften the blow. In later years you can hopefully look back and just focus on the good times that the two of you shared. He was very lucky to have such a good friend in you.
Connie :)
Connie :)
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Thank you Connie. I think so too
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, gregory, you did an excellent job writing this poem about your friend's last day and the thoughts he might have had. i wish i had a six for you. good luck in the contest
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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this is very well written, gregory, you did an excellent job writing this poem about your friend's last day and the thoughts he might have had. i wish i had a six for you. good luck in the contest
Comment Written 21-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Thank you so much! I'm really lad ou liked it. You're a great poet
Comment from ravenblack
I hope you know that this is an incredible piece of poetry. The butterflies cry my name tonight- such a perfect opening line, metamorphosis from a place of pain to light calling. Your passages about him looking back at his child self is incredibly moving, the child perspective so well-done, the inner child looking back, to him the adult self a hero. Reminisce from beyond a new tomorrow- excellent transition flowing so naturally into what his life is like and what others will think. The last two stanzas- you have done your friend proud. This is poetry with a capital P!!!
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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I hope you know that this is an incredible piece of poetry. The butterflies cry my name tonight- such a perfect opening line, metamorphosis from a place of pain to light calling. Your passages about him looking back at his child self is incredibly moving, the child perspective so well-done, the inner child looking back, to him the adult self a hero. Reminisce from beyond a new tomorrow- excellent transition flowing so naturally into what his life is like and what others will think. The last two stanzas- you have done your friend proud. This is poetry with a capital P!!!
Comment Written 21-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Wow man thank you. Hearing that from you means a lot. Truly this is one of the best reviews. Thank you. I wrote it as maybe what his last thoughts were. He took his life on that back porch. I wanted to write something to honor him. I was hesitant about posting it here, like subconsciously I wanted accolades or something, but honestly it isn't that, I feel like its good because it keeps me thinking of him, lets others think of him. I dreamt of him in Heaven, really. That makes me feel good. I think he's happy with it. Its for him. Truly man, thank you for reading this. Its the most special to me.
Comment from James Chaima Phiri
This is a sad story. Well, what are friends for? Among many things, a friend should try to defend a loved one, dead or alive. This is what you have done; to explain to the people who are quick to judge before they gather all facts. Thank you for sharing this story.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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This is a sad story. Well, what are friends for? Among many things, a friend should try to defend a loved one, dead or alive. This is what you have done; to explain to the people who are quick to judge before they gather all facts. Thank you for sharing this story.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2014
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Thank you. That's exactly right. You absolutely got it, thank you for that.
