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Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "Goin' to Ella's"
A Whole New Identity

16 total reviews 
Comment from TheWriteTeach
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Ahhh, I knew it! You wouldn't have devoted all this space to Terry and Ella if the readers didn't need to know about it for future refrence. We're getting in knee deep here, and I have an inkling what's coming up the pike! This chapter was so very comfortable - I was sitting down with old friends for a good visit. Loved it.

I loved your description of Chef's eyebrows crawled under his tall chef's hat. What a visual! It was perfect.

Suz

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
    We're gonna get a lot of that soon, and I think you'll like it. Amy almost blows his cover, but they both recover well!

    Lookee there, another sixer from you. I'm humbled, truly, and I can't thank you enough for the time and the effort you've spent here helping me in so many ways.

    Y'all're a ripe, sweet Georgia peach, yes y'are.

    Hugs and big thanks,
    Gayle
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
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I had no doubt the Chef wouldn't be able to work something out. Ella and Terry are right, maybe he needs new meds. LOL I loved reading about my old friends ago.

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 19-Jan-2014
    I think that's what's so fun about a series. The core characters are already familiar, and even though the new characters are prime, we still get to see our old friends, too.

    Thank you so much, Barbara, for the fine review and comments,

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment from Writingfundimension
Excellent
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A terrific chapter, Gayle. The opening sequence with dialogue is really well done - the French-laced English felt just right. And the ending with that fab crab dish. Voila! Hugs, Bev

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 19-Jan-2014
    Hi Bev, our Chef is a card, isn't he? And he's coming into his own with each new book. I love accents so I let him out to play when he's in the mood.

    So glad you liked this one, my friend.

    Hugs,
    Gayle
reply by Writingfundimension on 19-Jan-2014
    Yes, and I think you've struck the right notes between arrogance and caring about the quality of food which I find the trademark of every good French chef.

    You're very welcome, Gayle.

    Hugs, Bev
Comment from Rdfrdmom2
Excellent
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Gayle:

Now I am truly happy - the pups are back and in
great form. I miss them when they are not in a
chapter. I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to eat
Crab Terry due to my seafood allergy; however, it
sounds like something the rest of my family would
love.

love,
jan

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
    It does, doesn't it. Now if I could just pry the recipe from Chef's hand! It's funny about seafood. My sister is allergic to shrimp but has no problem with lobster or crab.

    Thank you for the beautiful card and the gorgeous photo of Lexie. That girl could easily slide into my family. My grand mother, one uncle, my mom, all three of us girls and my daughter have hair basically that color - strawberry blonde.

    All the very best to you, my friend, love seeing you,

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment from MidnightWriter4U
Excellent
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Well...now that I am thoroughly starving after reading this food critic's delight, I will attempt to review it. (Ignore the stomach growling.) Dialogue is excellent. Transitions well from paragraph to paragraph. I didn't notice any Spags. Overall held the attention. One suggestion: I would change at least one of these beginnings to paragraphs--three "The" starts in a row.

The private party business
The staff made great money
The girls sat together

French chef is quite the character, isn't he? Enjoyed this read!

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
    Very good ideas, my friend, and I'll fix. Yes, Chef is a character all his own. Of course, in a series, you get to relying on core characters to give you support, but he's a riot. Can't use him often, but he usually gets one or two scenes per book.

    So glad you enjoyed and I look forward to seeing you again.

    Hugs,
    Gayle
reply by MidnightWriter4U on 17-Jan-2014
    I think his character is a hoot! Wishing you all the best with this series. MN :)
Comment from lludlow
Excellent
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Color me confused. I have no idea who these people are or what they have to do with the Julia and Brad. Then I read some reviews and I'm guessing you have a series with these characters?
For a newbie coming in, this was too confusing. It took a while to figure out that there were dogs in the scene. And the "dance" at the beginning was really confusing. Maybe move it to a later section?
I'm sure this was fine for your regular readers, but I had a lot of trouble following and wondering where the main characters were.
Still well written and the dialog is nice--just confusing.

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
    It's one of the worst parts of writing a series with ongoing characters, no doubt about it, but I really don't know how else to handle it. Julia and Brad are going to go there for dinner and the start of their relationship. They'll be out of the Clinic in a couple of days, and much of the rest of the story will revolve around Jim and Lenny and what they do for a living. If you can, try to hang in. I think you'll enjoy once you get all the players on the plate.

    Thanks so much for hanging in!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
Excellent
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It didn't seem repetitive to me, and in fact I had to read the chapter twice so that I could sort out the characters clearly in my mind. At first reading I was confused between humans and dogs and it took a while to get Terry straightened out... since 'Terry' is usually a male name. Could you check the spelling of 'plebeian'... my dictionary spells it 'plebeian,' (paragraph 16) Giddy

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
    Hi Gayle,

    Y'know, I never realized that about Terry. When I was a kid, one of my best friends spelled it that way. Along the way, I've had other readers mention it should be Teri or Terri. Well, with seven earlier books already in print, I'm sort of out of options.

    Yes, I'll check plebeian. It's probably me, although my spell checker is usually pretty good. Thanks for the catch.
Comment from bookishfabler
Excellent
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Hi again. Very nice. I miss these guys. Can't wait to read more.while he gestured wildly and cursed in French patios.
(French Patios? Is this some sort of expression I never heard?)
hugs Heidi

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 16-Jan-2014
    French Patois. It's a regional dialect, like the dialect in Brooklyn. Oy, just saw something. Did I spell it 'patios'? Let me check that out.

    Hugs and big thanks, and much love,
    gayle
reply by bookishfabler on 16-Jan-2014
    I think you did. LOL.
Comment from lindalcreel
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Thanks for bringing this one out. I didn't know all the background about the restaurant, and am so glad that it was explained in this chapter. Now, I see how the two stories coincided because of the restaurant. Always a story somewhere with the patrons or the owners. Thanks again for sharing.

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 16-Jan-2014
    I gotta do it, Linda. Like Shelly, she's always after me for more! More Amy, more twins, now she wants a new doggie! LOL, love that lil gal.

    Don't you love Chef? Talk about larger than life, lol. And chefs are like that, delusions of Godhood.

    Thanks so much for the gorgeous sixer! It is most appreciated!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
reply by lindalcreel on 16-Jan-2014
    I do love his personality. I think you nailed it with him. He sounds French and arrogant. Two winning combos. lol
Comment from TervLass
Excellent
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Hi Gayle,

Okay,(LOL), I am a "newbie" (having come in mid-way through your last manuscript), and, now it's going to show.....

Have to let you know that I didn't catch on (forget about remembering!)....that Amy has 4 legs. "Ella and Amy stepped out of the shadows. "Wow, that's really something else. Do you guys rehearse or is it spontaneous?"

Notably I didn't even catch on when reading, "compliments of Amy". Truth? Shucks, I didn't realize until...."Amy waited by Ella's side, her inky black coat glistening,", and only then did I go back up to reread. Yep. I had pictured two young women stepping from the shadows! Maybe a tiny, tidbit more descriptor earlier for the likes of m'self. (And, yes, I finally DID remember! but not right away obviously. Ooops.)

Love the scene between Terry and Chef. Dialogue flows realistically well, and the underlying humor is an enjoyable reflection of their working relationship. Also, the wedding plans flow forth seamlessly. Bringing a close via the Chef (Crab Terry) is a nice cap on the chapter, as is his tongue-in-cheek, "...open in five minutes. I love it when things come together. This one was close." He savored every minute of chaos.

Cheers,
Helen

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 16-Jan-2014
    Well, Helen, you've got Chef pegged. Y'know, in a series, where you know all your characters so well, even when they're minimal they take on a life of their own.

    Chef gives me the opportunity to write repartee, to kind of let my funny side out. You might have figured it out by now, but I'm a frustrated TV script writer. Dialogue is my fave although narrative is great fun, too.

    The first time I really used him, can't remember which book, he was telling Ella how he just had to have another sous chef and that if she didn't make it happen, she'd be cooking the next meal.

    So, here comes some gal for an interview with Ella. They're in the middle of it when they hear a crash in the kitchen and Chef hollering in French. Next thing, Chef and an equally infuriated dishwasher burst into her office.

    They take one look at Ella, Chef says, "Back! Back to the kitchen, you insolent pup, before I'm slicing off your tongue."

    So Ella says to the gal, can you start tonight. She says yes, but she didn't bring her knives. "That's okay, Chef has enough to arm a small nation."

    Gal says, "Well, that's good. Overthrown anyone recently?"

    Ella shrugs, "Not so far."

    Other gal says, "That's okay, the day is young."

    Oh dear, sorry about that. Yes, I should have had Amy whine or something - mention her ears, you're right. I just get to feeling redundant, but you're right.

    I can't tell you how much fun it is to see your reviews. Thank you so much!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
reply by TervLass on 16-Jan-2014
    Oboy, yep, I can easily see you deep in script development! Enjoyed your glimpse into the past above, thanks, and look forward to more coming along in this story.

    Your welcome (reviews) - lit review is not my background, but I can let you know when I stub my toe on a character or his/her action, as a reader :-) And I must add that you handle my feedback with great diplomacy.

    Be sure to let me know when you have a tv series picked up!

    Cheers,
    Helen