Reviews from

Writing Prompt Entries 2014

Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Time To Play"
The clue is in the title!

14 total reviews 
Comment from MagKing
Excellent
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A good one! But why no more photographs?
You did very well with this piece, and I think it's contest worthy.

Good luck

MagKing

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 15-Jan-2014
    Hi MagKing, thank you for your nice review and good luck wishes, I appreciate both!
    No more photographs because playing is more fun than posing for the camera!
    Kindest regards, Debra :)
Comment from nelliesellie
Excellent
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I love the picture. I think all kids can get kind of tired having a camera shoved in their face. Now days it is phones. Parents need to put the phones down and play. Great work. Good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 15-Jan-2014
    Hi nelliesellie :) Thank you for your great review and good luck wishes, I appreciate both! Kindest regards as always, Debra :)
Comment from CowboyToo
Good
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I loved it until the "Comprendez Vous?" Of course that is the phrase a person might use when hounded by the Paparazzi, and I get it that you are going for some sardonic humor by having a child speak a weary sophisticated phrase. It just seemed to cause me to stop and think about it, and that isn't what you wanted.

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 Comment Written 14-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 15-Jan-2014
    Hi CowboyToo, thank you for your encouraging review. I'm sorry that the French stopped your enjoyment of the poem in it's tracks! Never mind... it's always good to know what works and what doesn't - I truly appreciate your comments. Congrats on the win by the way - well deserved :) Kindest regards, Debra
Comment from maggieadams
Excellent
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Love this poem with the message. Have you seen mothers and dads at the park, cell-phone camera in hand, snapping shots and not paying attention or really interacting at all with their child. Loved the French phrase. Good job.

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 15-Jan-2014
    Thank you maggieadams for your lovely encouraging review, I'm glad you enjoyed the poem :) Kindest regards, Debra
Comment from in777wr#
Excellent
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This was cute, and very funny. You could not have found a better picture for this poem. The poem flows, and reads well. Best to you in this contest.

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2014
    Thank you for your great review and good luck wishes :) I appreciate both! Kindest regards :)
Comment from Leineco
Excellent
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LOL... Great pairing of picture and poem :-)
A diva in the making (LOL)
(and you managed to squeeze into the 15 word limit!

Nice job :-)

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2014
    Hi :) Thank you for your great review, I appreciate your lovely comments! Kindest regards...:) x
Comment from howard11
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As a teacher, I often wonder how many children get fed up with the self-serving antics of adults, such as showing them off, in person or taking pictures for later. When my son was little I was guilty too. The key line for readers: 'That's enough for now'.

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2014
    Hi howard 11 :) Thank you for your great comments. I love to take pictures of the kids, simply to remind me really of the great times we have... they grow up too quick! I just need to sometimes remember to partake in the fun rather than record it! It's awkward trying to push a swing with 1 hand too! Kindest regards :)
Comment from mfowler
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This is too cute, and the photo confirms it. Your use of the French 'comprendez vous' is pivotal, as it takes the poem from a nice write about a child who doesn't want to,leave play, to an interesting brat who responds sarcastically in a foreign language

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2014
    Hi :) Thank you for your great comments... funny how a 3yr old knows how to be sarcastic... She must get it from her older siblings! (although she doesn't speak french - I used 'comprendez vous' to keep to the meter of the poem, also it didn't go over the word count allowance as it's english equivalent would have lol!) Kindest regards :)
Comment from James Chaima Phiri
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This is interesting. Did the child really think of what is contained in this poem? In any case, it fits well. I wish you the best in the contest.

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2014
    Hi James :) Thank you for your comments and good luck wishes. I appreciate both! She definitely had had enough of having her picture taken for one day (although she didn't write the poem, that was me LOL!) Thanks again and kindest regards :)
Comment from TAB_that's me
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This is a good short poem for the writing prompt. Written in 15 words it follows the rules. Good luck to you in the contest.
~Teresa~

 Comment Written 13-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2014
    Thank you Teresa for your kind review and good luck wishes. I appreciate both! Warmest regards...:)