Good Plan, Bad Timing
Even the simple plans need a little thought19 total reviews
Comment from Ric Myworld
It sure seems difficult to write a story using less than 150 words and being required to use words that really don't relate very well, but you did a great job. Thanks for the read.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013
It sure seems difficult to write a story using less than 150 words and being required to use words that really don't relate very well, but you did a great job. Thanks for the read.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013
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Thank you for the review and comments. It is much appreciated.
Comment from notdeadyet
This is a humorous little ditty showing the good intentions of two in love. You wrote it well, leading up to the comical climax. Hopefully, their love sees them through the mis-calculation. This could be the beginning of a longer story.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013
This is a humorous little ditty showing the good intentions of two in love. You wrote it well, leading up to the comical climax. Hopefully, their love sees them through the mis-calculation. This could be the beginning of a longer story.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013
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Thank you so much for the review and the delightful comments.
Comment from adewpearl
cast it's shadows - drop the apostrophe
You work the contest's required words in well
Good use of natural-sounding dialogue
A fun ending, especially knowing it's a true story. LOL Brooke :-)
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013
cast it's shadows - drop the apostrophe
You work the contest's required words in well
Good use of natural-sounding dialogue
A fun ending, especially knowing it's a true story. LOL Brooke :-)
Comment Written 13-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013
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Thank you so much for the review. I appreciate the comments.
Comment from Cajungirl
All requirements of the contest was met. I enjoyed the short story Sunset Rock sounds like a nice place to visit at Noon. LOL
I enjoyed your short story. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013
All requirements of the contest was met. I enjoyed the short story Sunset Rock sounds like a nice place to visit at Noon. LOL
I enjoyed your short story. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013
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Thank you for the review. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Oh, yes, the best-lain schemes of man often go awry. Stumbling around half-frozen in the dark just isn't conducive to romance! Good job on this little story
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
Oh, yes, the best-lain schemes of man often go awry. Stumbling around half-frozen in the dark just isn't conducive to romance! Good job on this little story
Comment Written 12-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
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Thank you Janice. I appreciate the review and nice comments.
Comment from Tatarka2
You did it! This was a very challenging challenge, I think, and you managed to tell a whole story (and it was even true!) Job well done. I don't know how you could improve it, using those words and with a 100-word count.
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
You did it! This was a very challenging challenge, I think, and you managed to tell a whole story (and it was even true!) Job well done. I don't know how you could improve it, using those words and with a 100-word count.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
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Thank you so much for the review and the nice comments. I'm glad you like it.
Comment from Jose Saic
Excellent short story about a plan of Dave and Marla to get breakfast early morning after hike to Sunset Rock.
Only they did not know that in this place the sun didn't cast it's shadows on the west side of the mountain until 10 a.m.
Sorry for them.They never awake early.
Very good story with a good sense of humour
I liked it.
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
Excellent short story about a plan of Dave and Marla to get breakfast early morning after hike to Sunset Rock.
Only they did not know that in this place the sun didn't cast it's shadows on the west side of the mountain until 10 a.m.
Sorry for them.They never awake early.
Very good story with a good sense of humour
I liked it.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
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Thank you for the great review. I appreciate your comments.
Smiles.
Comment from abbasjoy
I like how you captured romance, and humour in this short story.
The couple were about to have a romantic time together watching the sun come up. Suddenly Dave realizes they are out there in the cold, waiting for what is not going to happen for several hours.
You made good use of all the words required, causing the story to move along nicely, but because of the time this is taking place, wouldn't it be more appropriate to call it Sunrise Rock rather than Sunset Rock?
Perhaps I am missing something.
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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
I like how you captured romance, and humour in this short story.
The couple were about to have a romantic time together watching the sun come up. Suddenly Dave realizes they are out there in the cold, waiting for what is not going to happen for several hours.
You made good use of all the words required, causing the story to move along nicely, but because of the time this is taking place, wouldn't it be more appropriate to call it Sunrise Rock rather than Sunset Rock?
Perhaps I am missing something.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
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The thing is that my son and his girl friend actually went to Sunset rock expecting to see the sun rise. The point of the story is they weren't thinking. The sun doesn't rise on the west side of the mountain. It is a ture story. Thanks for the review.
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Thank you for the explanation.It was a well written story and I have changed the rating.
Comment from Petriesan
Been there,well, not Sunset Rock, but the last was Thunder Hole in the Acadia National Park. I misread what it was all about and felt a little foolish. . . .
All one can do, as I hope you family/characters did was take a nap and wait for the sun.
Never suspected the ending. Good work
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
Been there,well, not Sunset Rock, but the last was Thunder Hole in the Acadia National Park. I misread what it was all about and felt a little foolish. . . .
All one can do, as I hope you family/characters did was take a nap and wait for the sun.
Never suspected the ending. Good work
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013
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Thanks so much for the review and for sharing you own story.
It's much appreciated.