Air
Air is one of the essential elements for life7 total reviews
Comment from Starlit Ink
Yes, air is essential. We usually don't think about it much, but we couldn't live without it.
Every has three syllables, so the last line needs to have 5 syllables instead of 6.
maybe try: until that last breath, or something like that to correct it. Otherwise it is good, so best of luck.
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2013
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Yes, air is essential. We usually don't think about it much, but we couldn't live without it.
Every has three syllables, so the last line needs to have 5 syllables instead of 6.
maybe try: until that last breath, or something like that to correct it. Otherwise it is good, so best of luck.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2013
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No, every is bi-syllabic; /'evri/. Okay? But thanks for the review.
Comment from Silent1rose
This was just great. Hehe. It was amusing. I like how blunt you are. You should write a poem about the smell of grass after it rains. Or the smell of nature itself after it has rained. I just love that smell. :) I know this has nothing to do with you poem above but I think you'd do the smell of nature after it has rained justice. Good poem.
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2013
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This was just great. Hehe. It was amusing. I like how blunt you are. You should write a poem about the smell of grass after it rains. Or the smell of nature itself after it has rained. I just love that smell. :) I know this has nothing to do with you poem above but I think you'd do the smell of nature after it has rained justice. Good poem.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2013
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Thanks, perhaps I'll consider your outlook soon.
Comment from Darkhorse555
from the pictured piece breathing dressed in a blue awakening senses shawl in is presence surrounding us breathing beautiful piece
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2013
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from the pictured piece breathing dressed in a blue awakening senses shawl in is presence surrounding us breathing beautiful piece
Comment Written 03-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2013
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Thanks, you grasped that.
Comment from Selina Stambi
A commonplace fact, you've taken and crafted nicely into lines that adhere to the required format.
Nicely done.
p.s. To all who appreciate (not appreciates)
Welcome to Fanstory! All the best in the contest.
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2013
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A commonplace fact, you've taken and crafted nicely into lines that adhere to the required format.
Nicely done.
p.s. To all who appreciate (not appreciates)
Welcome to Fanstory! All the best in the contest.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2013
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Oh thank you! But "all" in the context refers to everybody; it could be singular or plural.
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It's always in the plural - check it out! :)
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Alright, I'd rather make use of everyone. Thanks
Comment from Ducorse
Short, to the point, and very true. An observation so simple that it is profound. Best of luck in the contest.
Thanks for a great read.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2013
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Short, to the point, and very true. An observation so simple that it is profound. Best of luck in the contest.
Thanks for a great read.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2013
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I, from the tap-root of my heart, give an unquantified and unreserved ThankYou for the encouragement-in-compliment.
Comment from TAB_that's me
This is a good 5-7-5 poem and a good one for the contest. It has the perfect syllable count. Good luck in the contest.
~Teresa~
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2013
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This is a good 5-7-5 poem and a good one for the contest. It has the perfect syllable count. Good luck in the contest.
~Teresa~
Comment Written 30-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2013
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I, from the tap-root of my heart, give an unquantified and unreserved ThankYou for the encouragement-in-compliment.
Comment from Cookie333
This is such a simple concept, but I don't think I have ever seen it expressed quite like this. All the pieces I have read, and I finally stumble upon a masterpiece, thank you
karen
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2013
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This is such a simple concept, but I don't think I have ever seen it expressed quite like this. All the pieces I have read, and I finally stumble upon a masterpiece, thank you
karen
Comment Written 30-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2013
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I, from the tap-root of my heart, give an unquantified and unreserved ThankYou for the encouragement-in-compliment.
