A Perfection's Worth
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Purpose in the Beat"A dedication to unconditional love...
16 total reviews
Comment from ravenblack
Drowning in thought, unable to turn it off. Surreal in that it seems to be underwater or in the air ( twine to a kite) and bursting cannons shouting flame suggesting water. In the old days, to check a river for bodies, they would fire a cannonball over the water. " a heartbeat needing purpose dies" says it all. Just live and be.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Drowning in thought, unable to turn it off. Surreal in that it seems to be underwater or in the air ( twine to a kite) and bursting cannons shouting flame suggesting water. In the old days, to check a river for bodies, they would fire a cannonball over the water. " a heartbeat needing purpose dies" says it all. Just live and be.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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You are extremely intelligent, with a very insightful review here. You're right. You've surprised me with how in tune you are. Thank you so much. Sometimes I'm afraid my words will come off too obscure or that people won't put the energy into looking deeper into the meaning. Searching for it. You have done that and more. Truly a boost of confidence that "you" are out there. That's who I write for. The insightful poets, readers. Thank you so much. I love your info on the cannonball. Could you explain further about what they did in the old days?
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If there was a drowned body, the sonic vibrations from a cannon ball shot over the water would cause it to rise to the top ( as long as gasses or air were still trapped in the body making it buoyant).
Comment from samandlancelot
Greg,
You wrote your poetic take on your point of view well, as always. I do have a different opinion about this. To whom much is given, much is expected. There is a big responsibility with knowing things. It can seem very freeing to now know. I remember after I believed in God when I was tested to the point where I wanted to turn away, I knew I could never go back to not knowing. It is good to keep seeking answers. Once we hear those answers, we are responsible for what we do with them.
I'm so grateful that I couldn't turn back when the heat seemed too hot for me. I got through, and I also received more answers.
Ignorance is bliss, but knowledge is powerful.
Patricia
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Greg,
You wrote your poetic take on your point of view well, as always. I do have a different opinion about this. To whom much is given, much is expected. There is a big responsibility with knowing things. It can seem very freeing to now know. I remember after I believed in God when I was tested to the point where I wanted to turn away, I knew I could never go back to not knowing. It is good to keep seeking answers. Once we hear those answers, we are responsible for what we do with them.
I'm so grateful that I couldn't turn back when the heat seemed too hot for me. I got through, and I also received more answers.
Ignorance is bliss, but knowledge is powerful.
Patricia
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Oooh that last line is POWERFUL. That's poetry in itself Patricia. I actually agree with you to a certain extent. My brain just works too hard. Its always thinking, always justifying or trying to scientifically/logically explain God. Sometimes I wish I didn't do that. Its done subconsciously maybe. Sometimes I don't like asking too many questions. I Love God and I want to ask questions to get closer to Him. Maybe that is what I am doing though.
Thank you so very much for reviewing and reading, and for your compliments. I also thank you for your thought provoking comments. Very powerful.
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I do understand, Greg. I have an analytical mind that tries to find reason and rationale for everything. An analytical mind is a gift, but we need to learn how to use it God's way. There are no fast answers to get there (what our flesh looks for), but it is important we don't cast away what God has given us.
Comment from country ranch writer
if we knew it all we would have nothing to look forward to would we?some times not knowing is worst than knowing.not understanding something could have hazards consequences
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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if we knew it all we would have nothing to look forward to would we?some times not knowing is worst than knowing.not understanding something could have hazards consequences
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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I agree with you. That's a big theme in this. Thank you so much for reading this, and for a great review!
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WELCOME
Comment from Treischel
Beautifully written and rhymed poem with classic abab rhyming and a dark undertone ispt glides smoothly along on that tight and peppy iambic rhythmn. Great alliteration throughout. Nicely composed, this carries wonderfull kinetic energy with such words as awake, agape, rotted, blindly, unraveled...
I really like that first the best in it's Poe-like darkness. ...
The death of dreams is sleeping life
Awake to feel the last exhale
Agape to taste the bleeding knife
A rotted passion sickened pale
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Beautifully written and rhymed poem with classic abab rhyming and a dark undertone ispt glides smoothly along on that tight and peppy iambic rhythmn. Great alliteration throughout. Nicely composed, this carries wonderfull kinetic energy with such words as awake, agape, rotted, blindly, unraveled...
I really like that first the best in it's Poe-like darkness. ...
The death of dreams is sleeping life
Awake to feel the last exhale
Agape to taste the bleeding knife
A rotted passion sickened pale
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Wow, once again,coming from you that's a Great compliment, a truly great review. I cherish it. May I ask you something? I've never heard kinetic energy in a poem defined well for me. Could you tell me? I truly appreciate your kind words and in depth review. Very very much so.
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Kinetic energy is where you use words that carry action or the potential for action to create a sence of movement that the reader can visualize.
As opposed to The use of onomatopoeia which is providing the sensation of sound, like I used when I said Kaboom in one of my poems.
Comment from Ben Colder
The poet reaches into the inner- man and stirs a desire to learn. The poem creates hunger to achieve the unachievable knowing faith will abound somewhere in eon. The Holy Scriptures speak from the mouth Of Jesus 'He that hunger and thirst after righteousness shall be filled."
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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The poet reaches into the inner- man and stirs a desire to learn. The poem creates hunger to achieve the unachievable knowing faith will abound somewhere in eon. The Holy Scriptures speak from the mouth Of Jesus 'He that hunger and thirst after righteousness shall be filled."
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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I Love your review. You seemed to really "get it". Truly thank you for that. It means so much. "Desire to learn" so insightful again. .
Comment from The Death
Hi Greg
the meter was flawless as per the tetrameter scheme.
The abab rhyme scheme for the quatrains is nicely carried out through well rhyming and near rhyme as in 'rhyme and climb'.
Nice alliteration in
death of dreams
passion sickened pale.
Complementing artwork
And the the last line is the show stealer.an excellent work
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Hi Greg
the meter was flawless as per the tetrameter scheme.
The abab rhyme scheme for the quatrains is nicely carried out through well rhyming and near rhyme as in 'rhyme and climb'.
Nice alliteration in
death of dreams
passion sickened pale.
Complementing artwork
And the the last line is the show stealer.an excellent work
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Wow thank you so much. As I said, I love your reviews. Thank you for complimenting the last line too! I asked about the "near rhyme" beforehand as I wanted them to all be perfect rhymes. I was told it was in fact a perfect line. Are they misinformed? If so, is there even a word then that is perfect to climb?
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
