The poor beggar
Inspired from a father begging for his children's food.6 total reviews
Comment from CeciliaLynne
Amelia I found your choice of art interesting. With the help of your notes I could buy into your concept and appreciate your poem. My only concern would be that for future competitions watch if they specify a syllable count or other instructions that are crucial to qualifying your entry. You are truly gifted.
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Amelia I found your choice of art interesting. With the help of your notes I could buy into your concept and appreciate your poem. My only concern would be that for future competitions watch if they specify a syllable count or other instructions that are crucial to qualifying your entry. You are truly gifted.
Comment Written 21-Jun-2014
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Hey sweety. Good try but you have words, not meter so when you post, put whether it is 5-7-5 words or 5-7-5 meter. Meter is syllable count.
Both in rain and strain
he begs for a little grain
family must abstain
Go over to info and click on poem types and that will explain what you need to follow.
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2013
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Hey sweety. Good try but you have words, not meter so when you post, put whether it is 5-7-5 words or 5-7-5 meter. Meter is syllable count.
Both in rain and strain
he begs for a little grain
family must abstain
Go over to info and click on poem types and that will explain what you need to follow.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2013
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Thank you Mrs.Barb and if you don't mind I'd rather call you aunt . And many many thanks for the generous rating and firstly for reading my work. I'm new here and will definitely improve . It's a promise.
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Just write from the heart. lots of ones here will be wonderful and help you learn meter and count. Ask if you need to. I love to hear from the heart.
Comment from adewpearl
You have three lines as you are supposed to but your syllable count is off
This is because it looks like you counted words per line and not syllables
I like your rhymes and the thoughtful point you are making
Brooke
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2013
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You have three lines as you are supposed to but your syllable count is off
This is because it looks like you counted words per line and not syllables
I like your rhymes and the thoughtful point you are making
Brooke
Comment Written 17-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2013
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THANK YOU FOR BRINGING THIS TO MY NOTICE AND I PROMISE TO NOT REPEAT THIS IN ANY OF MY FUTURE WORKS.ALL THE SAME I'M GLAD YOU LIKED MY WORK.THANK YOU FOR SPENDING YOUR VALUABLE TIME AND TAKING THE BURDEN OF BRINGING MY BLUNDERS TO MY NOTICE.
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Hey, we all are new to these forms at one time or another. It's no big deal :-)
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THANKS ADEW FOR BEING SO ENCOURAGING
Comment from fishhook
A 5-7-5 is generally referring to the number of syllables per line, not words. I didn't see anything that would alter that expectation. Also, one should not use all capitalized letters. A 5-7-5 is usually non-rhyming.
Do not despair! I like the image you focused on for this.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2013
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A 5-7-5 is generally referring to the number of syllables per line, not words. I didn't see anything that would alter that expectation. Also, one should not use all capitalized letters. A 5-7-5 is usually non-rhyming.
Do not despair! I like the image you focused on for this.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2013
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THANKS A LOT FOR YOUR INFORMATION.TO BE FRANK THIS IS MY POEM OF THIS KIND AND I'M REALLY GLAD TO RECEIVE SUCH HELPFUL COMMENTS.I PROMISE THAT I'LL KEEP THIS IN MIND AND IMPROVE MY WORK.
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Umm, your caps lock is still on..
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I have the habit of keeping it 'on' all the time.But not this time.:-l
Comment from SaluteDobby
It's very sad that some people lead a decadent lifestyle while others are emaciated due to lack of food. Well written poem, tugging at the heart strings.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2013
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It's very sad that some people lead a decadent lifestyle while others are emaciated due to lack of food. Well written poem, tugging at the heart strings.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2013
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THANK YOU DOBBY.I'M REALLY GLAD TO KNOW THAT PEOPLE ARE TAKING MY LINES TO THE HEART THAN JUST READING THROUGH THE WORDS.AND THANK YOU FOR SPENDING YOUR TIME ON MY WRITING.
Comment from Roblac
It just makes you really think about how lucky you are. The message is a strong message.
I wish you all the best in your future writing.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2013
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It just makes you really think about how lucky you are. The message is a strong message.
I wish you all the best in your future writing.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2013
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THANKS A LOT ROBLAC.I'M GLAD THAT YOU GOT THE MESSAGE THAT WAS INTENDED TO BE GIVEN.THANKS FOR YOUR KIND COMMENTS TOO.
