Reviews from

Savannah Love

Viewing comments for Chapter 36 "Chapter 9, part 1"
Can a fallen confederate soldier encourage love?

71 total reviews 
Comment from Gert sherwood
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Barb,
Good you are making your story more and more eventfully with each chapter
Cash and is even getting on edge and the idea of a hiiden stair case is really mysterious

Gert

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    Thank you for the kind review. I am not sure what it will take for Cash to believe. LOL
reply by Gert sherwood on 13-Mar-2013
    You are welcome
    Gert
Comment from cheyennewy
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Barbara,

I will be home tomorrow and hope I can catch up, just like you. This is a great chapter and one I enjoyed reading. However, I find it a little scary for everyone in the house. I think this whole thing has given Cash pause but doubt he will admit it as not to scare Paige. Now I am worried about a secret staircase and wonder what they will find there. Well done....blessings, chey

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    Thank you for the kind review. I just took a minutes to write down all the things I need to clear up in this novel, so I don't miss anything. I have tangled a huge web.
Comment from Gungalo
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Ooooh a secret staircase. I wouldn't be surprised if there were a tunnel too. This is all a bunch of nonsense. If you ask me, someone is doing it to her and I think I know who.

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    Hmmm, we will have to wait and see. I am wondering if there aren't the beings involved. Thank you for the kind review.
reply by Gungalo on 13-Mar-2013
    Well that was ny first guess. LOL
reply by Gungalo on 13-Mar-2013
    Well that was my first guess. LOL
Comment from Bender8982
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Great job, i am very pleased by the wordage of your work. it has a great emotion to it as well. you have done a wonderful job here and should be happy with your work. keep it coming :) i want to see more.

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Selina Stambi
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another great chapter. You are wise to keep the postings concise.

I like the smell of mystery in the midst of potential romance.

Hapyy Spring Break!

Spags:

your wife's pea shooter can do. (no question mark)

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    Thank you for the eagle eye. I appreciate the review.
Comment from Shadow Pahn
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi barbara,

I haven't read the previous chapters and i usually don't get into reviewing pieces that are already well under way, but because this was so nice and short, i read it just to see if it would entice me.

I would probably read on, but i'll have to delve into the start first to get to know the characters a bit better

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from unimatrix001
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oooo... Secret passage ways in the spooky house. Good tension builder.

Nothing seem[ed] out of order. - minor tense error


 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    Thank you for the kind review. I thought I already fixed that. I must have forgotten to save.
Comment from Norbanus
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Excellent interaction between the character, Barbara.

Here are a couple of spots to check:

and they scanned the room before entering. Nothing seems(seemed) out of order.

It don't(doesn't) make sense



 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    I have fixed the seemed but I will keep the don't because it fits the character of the person doing the thinking. He wouldn't think with proper grammar. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from garrymc5
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Mostly good. A few things:
Morgan put his front paws on the arm of the couch and barked. Paige petted his head. "What's wrong?" ---You have made the dog the subject. Suggest we see it from Paige's or Cash's viewpoint. OR omit, and start with the door knock. It get things moving faster.
From there, the story gets going...
You can omit It don't make sense. It's impied, and adds nothing.
The ending: There's no secret tunnels." Cash started up the stairs. "Where does it lead?" seems like a contradiction, and only confuses. There is a 'hook' that needs reshaping, if you want it to work.
Overall need to tighten up, get all expressions right, and leave the reader wanting more.

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    I have made all the corrections except deleting the puppy. I have way too many fans who love the pup's input. I would probably be tarred and feathered. Thank you for your eagle eye and help.
reply by garrymc5 on 13-Mar-2013
    I see. Fair enough, but maybe the pup can be included a little further down, or use it as the hook.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    I will see what I can do about rearranging the pup. Many of my reviews comment on the pup. Go figure.
Comment from TonyCr
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted


This is excellent it's well written, the plot is strong, the characters are well fleshed out and there is a sense of anticipation at the end of the chapter.

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2013


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2013
    Thank you for the kind review.