Comment from Maureen's Pen

Exceptional

This is a fabulous dramatic story poem. It pulled me into it and along I went as if on a wave cresting the whole work.

I enjoyed it, powerful and thought provoking piece to read.
I found my self pausing after the read but before the review.
It was a "stillness" that spoke volumes.

Thanks for sharing an exceptional work.
Maureen

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Hello friend,

I can`t thank you enough for the six stars. I am so glad my poem spoke to you. Blessings to you and yours.

Comment from Margaret Snowdon

Excellent

I've never read anything like this
before - it drew me in - quite a
dramatic piece on Adam's fall from
grace.

his twisted - His
blinded by his lies - meaning God, I presume -- thus His - cap H


Margaret

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.

Comment from Jane Johnson

Exceptional

I get rather bored with so many religious poems, but his one is excellent. The words flowed so well and told the story of our beginning. I liked the way you approached the subject and the way it came to a finish at the end. I loved the artwork you chose to compliment your poem and the color scheme used. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Thank you so much for the six stars...I truly appreciate them and I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.

Comment from Gungalo

Excellent

We are the lost sheep, He is our Shepherd.
We are the fallen, He is our Savior.
We were condemned to die,
He is the way to eternal life.
For He is truth.
He is Jesus Christ, the Son of God.

And that is the way of the Lord. Adam had to fall for he was part of the garden.

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.

Comment from Deborah Marie

Excellent

Extremely fitting photo choice for a beautiful poem take on Adam... Nice progresson of wording, rhythm and flow. This lends itself to a good read. I enjoyed your poem. Have you considered a Bible verse from Gensis to go with your poem? It would be appropiate and further enhance your poem. Thanks for sharing, Deb

 Comment Written 09-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.

Comment from Fish

Good

I'm not sure that you have gotten your
mythology correct... Adam may have fallen
from grace by plooking Eve, but it was
Satan who wanted to rule the universe
and take over the hot-seat, as it were.
If having any sort of knowledge makes
you evil, then were all pretty much
doomed, according to that quackery.

Oh, I see... in the end, you just wanted
to proselytize.

Fish


This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 09-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Hello Fish,

First, I have no idea what the word plooking means. As far as Adam wanting to rule the universe...that`s not what I said...Satan tempted by saying that they would be like God knowing good and evil and that they would never die. It was not about knowledge for I am sure they knew many things. It was about knowing evil as evil existed as an entity and was not in our nature to desire it. It was also about disobedience. I also believe that one should never put down or mock someone else`s beliefs which is pretty much what you have done. I did not intend for my words to convert anyone they were an expression of my faith. Thank you for reading and reviewing...blessings.

Comment from Misrael

Excellent

Very good way of portraying Adam and how he might have felt. Personally I think that Adam is more to blame because he took of the fruit knowing what would happen. Eve was deceived but Adam was not so he I think bore more responsibility. Good read and keep on writing.

 Comment Written 09-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.

Comment from dmt1967

Excellent

This is a good poem I like the way you emphasized on Adam falling from grace I liked that and the black and white picture was a nice touch thank you for sharing

 Comment Written 09-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.

Comment from mumsyone

Excellent

He is the way to eternal life.
For He is truth.
He is Jesus Christ, the Son of God.

Nicely done. Nice to see someone sticking close to Bible truths. Good job!

 Comment Written 09-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.

Comment from Roxanna Andrews

Exceptional

I think this deserves a 6, very well said, well written. Wonderful words of truth, I applaud your honesty of the gospel. Very well done.

 Comment Written 09-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013

Thank you so much for the six stars and your words...I truly appreciate them and I am glad you enjoyed it...blessings.