Adam (A Fall From Grace)
Adam`s fall in the Garden of Eden60 total reviews
Comment from honeytree
I am not sure what the art work is its presence suits
These words that have been written.
Man had his chance to be happy on earth
Instead he committed a sin that God did not like.
Adam and his wife Eve were banished from God because of sin.
Adam and Eve suffered and because of this sin.
God sent His Son to show us all the right way to live.
Honey tree
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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I am not sure what the art work is its presence suits
These words that have been written.
Man had his chance to be happy on earth
Instead he committed a sin that God did not like.
Adam and his wife Eve were banished from God because of sin.
Adam and Eve suffered and because of this sin.
God sent His Son to show us all the right way to live.
Honey tree
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thank you so much for the six stars...I truly appreciate them and I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
Comment from justatuna
I really enjoyed this poem. It's not something I would normally read, but you did a wonderful job. Very intense words that created a certain dark atmosphere. Great job.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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I really enjoyed this poem. It's not something I would normally read, but you did a wonderful job. Very intense words that created a certain dark atmosphere. Great job.
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
Comment from AprilShower
Wow! This free style poem really tells our original parents' story well. It shows the battles we still fight. This is a well written free style poem. I enjoyed reading it, Idamarty.
April
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Wow! This free style poem really tells our original parents' story well. It shows the battles we still fight. This is a well written free style poem. I enjoyed reading it, Idamarty.
April
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thank you so much for the six stars...I truly appreciate them and I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
Comment from cephira
Congrats on the blue ribbon and all time best seal! You told a story here that spanned creation to the present day - no small feat! I liked the line,"There are glimpses of what once was,if you look past the concrete and steel,past the hardened hearts,past ourselves." I enjoyed the imagery of the concrete exteriors and interiors of the soul.
Cephira
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Congrats on the blue ribbon and all time best seal! You told a story here that spanned creation to the present day - no small feat! I liked the line,"There are glimpses of what once was,if you look past the concrete and steel,past the hardened hearts,past ourselves." I enjoyed the imagery of the concrete exteriors and interiors of the soul.
Cephira
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
Comment from mermaids
I like how the focus of the poem is on Adam and how at the end, redemption is possible. I also like the line about Adam being naked, exposed to himself. Excellent flow of lines and your poem holds the reader's interest. You tell a story with meaning here.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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I like how the focus of the poem is on Adam and how at the end, redemption is possible. I also like the line about Adam being naked, exposed to himself. Excellent flow of lines and your poem holds the reader's interest. You tell a story with meaning here.
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
Comment from RaymondJohn
The traditional interpretation of Adam's fall, and very well put. What I have never been able to understand is if Adam and Eve are really innocent children, why did he tell them not to eat the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil? This would seem to imply there already was evil in the world, and Adam's fall didn't cause all our miseries. Just a thought. Good write. Ray.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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The traditional interpretation of Adam's fall, and very well put. What I have never been able to understand is if Adam and Eve are really innocent children, why did he tell them not to eat the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil? This would seem to imply there already was evil in the world, and Adam's fall didn't cause all our miseries. Just a thought. Good write. Ray.
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
Comment from Gert sherwood
I like your freestyle poem . Idamarty
Why, for once Eve was not acusssed of how God drove out her and Adam out of the Garden of Eden
Note:
I think you really don't need you last stanza,
The previous stanzas say what is needed
Gert
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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I like your freestyle poem . Idamarty
Why, for once Eve was not acusssed of how God drove out her and Adam out of the Garden of Eden
Note:
I think you really don't need you last stanza,
The previous stanzas say what is needed
Gert
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
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You are welcome
Gert
Comment from mshirachot
Great writing. I like how you journeyed from Adam's fall and included his opportunity for redemption...via the spotless Lamb, He who is also called the second Adam.
This was my favorite verse:
"Now I lay naked, exposed to myself, tainted,
blinded by his lies; a forgery of the divine image,
destined to become the dust from whence I came.
Remembered for only a moment, by the wind
that will scatter any memory of me across the earth."
If I had any suggestion at all it would be to link a reference to the second Adam (1 Corinthians 15)...but that is just a personal preference to make it a full circle of Adam's redemption.
Blessings! Thanks for sharing!
Marhsa
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Great writing. I like how you journeyed from Adam's fall and included his opportunity for redemption...via the spotless Lamb, He who is also called the second Adam.
This was my favorite verse:
"Now I lay naked, exposed to myself, tainted,
blinded by his lies; a forgery of the divine image,
destined to become the dust from whence I came.
Remembered for only a moment, by the wind
that will scatter any memory of me across the earth."
If I had any suggestion at all it would be to link a reference to the second Adam (1 Corinthians 15)...but that is just a personal preference to make it a full circle of Adam's redemption.
Blessings! Thanks for sharing!
Marhsa
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thank you so much for the six stars...I truly appreciate them and I am so glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
Comment from hopeflys
I really like reading your poem. The words flowed together great and I really enjoyed reading your piece of poetry. Hopeflys 0:D
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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I really like reading your poem. The words flowed together great and I really enjoyed reading your piece of poetry. Hopeflys 0:D
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
Comment from Reddy Rimer
The unfolding story of the fall of man is told in vivid detail. The hope of the world is then presented in all his glory! You have shown the contrast between the two extremes in well-chosen words and images.
Since Eve is not mentioned before her one sentence, I would include some sort of explanation of who she is. Perhaps something like "his twisted words slithered around my beloved Eve, the beautiful wife given me by the Creator....."
Just saying.
I like this in its entirety so much that I will save it for future reading.
Connie
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
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The unfolding story of the fall of man is told in vivid detail. The hope of the world is then presented in all his glory! You have shown the contrast between the two extremes in well-chosen words and images.
Since Eve is not mentioned before her one sentence, I would include some sort of explanation of who she is. Perhaps something like "his twisted words slithered around my beloved Eve, the beautiful wife given me by the Creator....."
Just saying.
I like this in its entirety so much that I will save it for future reading.
Connie
Comment Written 11-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2013
-
Thanks so much for reading and reviewing...glad you enjoyed it...blessings.
