Falling Apart Completely
Funny poem about my job-just kidding16 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This is a funny and true poem about the hectic scene in schools. I work with teens and know that the elementary is even more harried than here.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
  |
This is a funny and true poem about the hectic scene in schools. I work with teens and know that the elementary is even more harried than here.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
-
Thank you Bill for reviewing my silly poem. Yes, it gets pretty hectic but I love it.
Comment from Rondeno
How about, instead of "We all need a trip to a resort", "But we're committed - hold that thought!" Just a suggestion. I enjoyed the poem hugely.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
|
How about, instead of "We all need a trip to a resort", "But we're committed - hold that thought!" Just a suggestion. I enjoyed the poem hugely.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
-
Thank you Rondeno for your review of my poem and suggestion of how I might improve on it. I appreciate you input.
Comment from mermaids
I enjoyed reading this poem, I am a nurse in a nursing home and it never occured to me, that being a school nurse can be hectic. Well down here and best wishes for the contest.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
|
I enjoyed reading this poem, I am a nurse in a nursing home and it never occured to me, that being a school nurse can be hectic. Well down here and best wishes for the contest.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
-
Thank you mermaids for reviewing my poem. I have never worked in a nursing home but I know it is a challenge. I did a 3 wk. rotation in one while in nursing school. Very difficult work and often very heartbreaking. I have only worked in hospitals, County Health, Home Health, and finally school health. I once had an entire different view of school nursing, too. The school I work in is huge with over 150 of the 800 students with special needs like trachs, caths, daily seizures, MS, CP, Autism, etc. I take care of daycare of staff children from birth to 4. Then 4yo's preK to 5th grade. I also treat and see staff. Busy, but i like it.
-
Nursing home is very difficult and sometimes I am still amazed I work in one. I also like being busy. It sounds like you have quite a variety of patients. Elaine
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi Jo, Love this one. I have very fond memories of the school nurses...lol! I love the rhymes and the humor. Good luck in your contest. This one is great! xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
|
Hi Jo, Love this one. I have very fond memories of the school nurses...lol! I love the rhymes and the humor. Good luck in your contest. This one is great! xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
-
Thank you Kiwi for your generous stars and review of my poem. I am truly glad you liked it.
Comment from missy98writer
Poet,
Your ode to being a school nurse is very well written with colorful imagery painted by your pen.
The cartoon art work you used is priceless.
In your poem you used excellent rhyme and meter.
You used great alliteration: "exhausted elementary, We'll wish & so sweetly."
You also used very good narrative.
I enjoyed your last stanza:
Christmas vacation soon will be here
We'll wish the dears good cheer
Wave goodbye ever so sweetly
And then fall apart completely.
I wish you good luck in the contest.
I'd recommend your funny poem to other reviewers,
Please have a nice day,
Missy.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
|
Poet,
Your ode to being a school nurse is very well written with colorful imagery painted by your pen.
The cartoon art work you used is priceless.
In your poem you used excellent rhyme and meter.
You used great alliteration: "exhausted elementary, We'll wish & so sweetly."
You also used very good narrative.
I enjoyed your last stanza:
Christmas vacation soon will be here
We'll wish the dears good cheer
Wave goodbye ever so sweetly
And then fall apart completely.
I wish you good luck in the contest.
I'd recommend your funny poem to other reviewers,
Please have a nice day,
Missy.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
-
Thank you missy for reviewing my poem. I am very glad you liked it.
Comment from Terror2s
I love the picture. Wow-you must be a lice expert, and you didn't even include that in your piece. Thanks for sharing. Good luck. T2
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
|
I love the picture. Wow-you must be a lice expert, and you didn't even include that in your piece. Thanks for sharing. Good luck. T2
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
-
The lice is in another poem I wrote about school nursing. :o) Yep, I'm probably an expert been doing this 14 years. Love it. Thanks for reviewing my work. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from ajdevore
Cute. Along with the teachers, you have a lot of frustration to inspire your writing. Good job and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
|
Cute. Along with the teachers, you have a lot of frustration to inspire your writing. Good job and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
-
Thank you ajdevore for reviewing my poem. Yes, it can be frustrating but so very amusing and rewarding, too.
Comment from Benjamin Valencia
Hello. Very neat description of your job. Your rhyming symmetry was great. I liked how you related this to Christmas too. Indeed, full of energy these creatures have from all the sugar they eat. Good luck in the contest and cheers.
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2012
|
Hello. Very neat description of your job. Your rhyming symmetry was great. I liked how you related this to Christmas too. Indeed, full of energy these creatures have from all the sugar they eat. Good luck in the contest and cheers.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2012
-
Thank you Benjamin for your comments and review. I am glad you liked my silly poem. Yes, get the kids all sugared up and it's a hoot.
Comment from prayingpoet
Aw yes, school nurses, teachers and aides will be happy for that break we call CHRISTMAS BREAK! Good luck with the contest. Very nicely written.
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2012
|
Aw yes, school nurses, teachers and aides will be happy for that break we call CHRISTMAS BREAK! Good luck with the contest. Very nicely written.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2012
-
Thank you Janice for your kind review. Yes, we are all chomping at the bit to "get out of here."
Comment from GE Parson
Hey that's funny. Loved it.
Sending you a poem of a jobI once had. Of course I doctored it up. GRAMPA'S GOT A NEW JOB
Yep! That's right, 'O Grampa finally got
A new job, as a night security man,
In the most elite Sports arena
In all of Casa Grand.
"Hey Grampa, that's really great!
I thought you said no one wanted old men."
"Yep, that's what I always said."
"So how did you get this job?"
"I lied. From my real age I deducted ten."
"Grampa! You didn't! Tell me you are lying now !"
"OK I promise you I'm telling you
The truth, the whole truth
And everything but the truth."
"Grampa, there is no way,
Any one would believe
You are only sixty-three "
"Yeah you're right,
Many think I' m fifty-three."
"Yeah sure and some people
Think I'm Babe Ruth; honestly Grampa,
Sometimes I can't tell if you're exaggerating
Or telling the truth!
(Gramma says....
"You know he's lying,
I mean exaggerating
When ever you see
His lips moving!"
"So how did you do on your first night?"
"Well as you may or may not know,
There is a lot of night activities
Goes on at the Casa Grande Francisco,
People come from all over the world
To golf, play soccer and honey moon,
Famous people like Tiger Woods
Bradshaw, and singing legend Pat Boone
With whom I was honored to have been
Invited to have lunch with him and his entourage
OH C'mon, Grampa! You don't expect any one
To believe that bunch of hodge-podge!
There is a lot of drinking goes on there,
And I don't mean soft liquor, or lemonade,
After a person has stood at the bar for awhile,
Their good sense just naturally begins to fade,
And that's exactly what happened last night,
Two drunk friends got into a fisticuffs,
In my most authoritative, but caaalm voice,
I screamed, "OK YOU GUYS, THAT'S ENOUGH!!!!
Immediately they released each other,
Turned and looked at me with eyes of fear,
I looked back at them with sternness of face,
The entire bar crowd broke into a great cheer.
Well the rest of the night went without incident,
I had established myself to one and all,
If you don't behave yourself,
Security Officer Jerry will get a call
- By Grampa G. E. Parson
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2012
|
Hey that's funny. Loved it.
Sending you a poem of a jobI once had. Of course I doctored it up. GRAMPA'S GOT A NEW JOB
Yep! That's right, 'O Grampa finally got
A new job, as a night security man,
In the most elite Sports arena
In all of Casa Grand.
"Hey Grampa, that's really great!
I thought you said no one wanted old men."
"Yep, that's what I always said."
"So how did you get this job?"
"I lied. From my real age I deducted ten."
"Grampa! You didn't! Tell me you are lying now !"
"OK I promise you I'm telling you
The truth, the whole truth
And everything but the truth."
"Grampa, there is no way,
Any one would believe
You are only sixty-three "
"Yeah you're right,
Many think I' m fifty-three."
"Yeah sure and some people
Think I'm Babe Ruth; honestly Grampa,
Sometimes I can't tell if you're exaggerating
Or telling the truth!
(Gramma says....
"You know he's lying,
I mean exaggerating
When ever you see
His lips moving!"
"So how did you do on your first night?"
"Well as you may or may not know,
There is a lot of night activities
Goes on at the Casa Grande Francisco,
People come from all over the world
To golf, play soccer and honey moon,
Famous people like Tiger Woods
Bradshaw, and singing legend Pat Boone
With whom I was honored to have been
Invited to have lunch with him and his entourage
OH C'mon, Grampa! You don't expect any one
To believe that bunch of hodge-podge!
There is a lot of drinking goes on there,
And I don't mean soft liquor, or lemonade,
After a person has stood at the bar for awhile,
Their good sense just naturally begins to fade,
And that's exactly what happened last night,
Two drunk friends got into a fisticuffs,
In my most authoritative, but caaalm voice,
I screamed, "OK YOU GUYS, THAT'S ENOUGH!!!!
Immediately they released each other,
Turned and looked at me with eyes of fear,
I looked back at them with sternness of face,
The entire bar crowd broke into a great cheer.
Well the rest of the night went without incident,
I had established myself to one and all,
If you don't behave yourself,
Security Officer Jerry will get a call
- By Grampa G. E. Parson
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2012
-
Thank you for the review of my poem. I enjoyed your poem, too.
