Becky's Beach Adventure
A fun day at the beach, or is it?28 total reviews
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi J, Believe it or not, that is also my ultimate goal to produce children's books such as this one. I think you have given us an exceptional drama come learning experience with this one and I wouldn't hesitate to find some professional publisher to read it. I think you are on to something with this sort of thing. Loved it! xoxo deborah
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Hi J, Believe it or not, that is also my ultimate goal to produce children's books such as this one. I think you have given us an exceptional drama come learning experience with this one and I wouldn't hesitate to find some professional publisher to read it. I think you are on to something with this sort of thing. Loved it! xoxo deborah
Comment Written 10-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Wow, that's like one of the best reviews I've gotten for that story. I want to take all the reviews on the story and look at those with corrections/suggestions and then move forward. Again Deb, thank you. John
Comment from Vinnyfan
Cute little story. Very realistic dialog at the beginning with Becky asking one question after another without stopping. Anyone with children can attest to that.
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2012
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Cute little story. Very realistic dialog at the beginning with Becky asking one question after another without stopping. Anyone with children can attest to that.
Comment Written 13-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2012
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Thank you vinny for reading and commenting in the story. Yup, with three kids, they always kept firing questions...
Comment from Titanx9
This is an interesting story. It has great imagery, and one can see how this would be a great picture book for children under 10, perhaps. I think you did a great job!!
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2012
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This is an interesting story. It has great imagery, and one can see how this would be a great picture book for children under 10, perhaps. I think you did a great job!!
Comment Written 12-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2012
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Thank you Titan for reading and positive comments
Comment from Silverjay36
Fun story! I noticed a few words not written correctly; such as tupid which should be stupid, tunburn should be sunburn, and so on. I do not know if they were purposely written this way, but children need to know the correct spelling of words in picture books.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2012
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Fun story! I noticed a few words not written correctly; such as tupid which should be stupid, tunburn should be sunburn, and so on. I do not know if they were purposely written this way, but children need to know the correct spelling of words in picture books.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2012
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Those words were intentionally written as such which related back to her toothless smile, the inability to say the word properly. It was used as a mechanism to have the reader say the word as such and hopefully get the reader to listen,
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
This looks a good length for a child's picture book. and it was good to see the main character, little Becky, overcoming her fear of the ocean. I wonder about some of the words for a little child for example 'spotted' and 'frazzled.' Good luck for the contest.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2012
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This looks a good length for a child's picture book. and it was good to see the main character, little Becky, overcoming her fear of the ocean. I wonder about some of the words for a little child for example 'spotted' and 'frazzled.' Good luck for the contest.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2012
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Thank you Giddy for reading and your comments. I understand your concern for words above their head. I'll take a look. Much appreciated!!
Comment from rexgal
I like the first part when Becky zoned out and went into her fantasy world when her mother was talking to her.
I would like to see more childlike thoughts through out the rest of the story.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2012
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I like the first part when Becky zoned out and went into her fantasy world when her mother was talking to her.
I would like to see more childlike thoughts through out the rest of the story.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2012
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Understood! Thank you rexgal for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate it and will look at it.
Comment from Darla9
Nice story for kids. I like the SunnyGirl superhero idea. It's hard to judge picture book without the pictures, but I do believe it has a potential. Well done :)
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2012
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Nice story for kids. I like the SunnyGirl superhero idea. It's hard to judge picture book without the pictures, but I do believe it has a potential. Well done :)
Comment Written 11-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2012
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Well I agree about the non-picture comment, but also saying it has potential regardless leads me to believe that with a few tweaks here and there, maybe there is a possibility. Thanks for your time and positive comments.
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Yes this reads very well you brought Becky to life very well with the descriptions through out a very good fun read for children well done good luck in the contest regards Jill
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2012
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Yes this reads very well you brought Becky to life very well with the descriptions through out a very good fun read for children well done good luck in the contest regards Jill
Comment Written 11-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2012
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Thank you Jill for reading and positive comments.
Comment from Leen1
Wonderfully written from an adult and a child's point of view. I truly enjoyed this piece. As a reader I found myself engrossed in finding out just what that day at the beach represented. This is a book with a clear message for children to be mindful whenever enjoying themselves at the beach or pool. Good job!
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2012
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Wonderfully written from an adult and a child's point of view. I truly enjoyed this piece. As a reader I found myself engrossed in finding out just what that day at the beach represented. This is a book with a clear message for children to be mindful whenever enjoying themselves at the beach or pool. Good job!
Comment Written 11-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2012
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Thank you Leen for reading and for the positive commentary you provided. I appreciate your time and talent.
Comment from Chris Tee
This is so sweet and Becky had a rough rider in the shallow surf. Great write that we have here. Well done indeed and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2012
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This is so sweet and Becky had a rough rider in the shallow surf. Great write that we have here. Well done indeed and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2012
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Thank you Chris for reading and the positive comments, I appreciate it very much.
